to not get smashing things with Cancer written on them?

[Bogeyface]

Just seen it on The Last Leg.

Dont get me wrong, I think fundraising for research into treatments for cancer is a great thing, happy to raise money for that, especially given how many people in my family have been taken by it.

But I dont understand the point of smashing something up. Do the smashers up donate when they do it? If they do then greatm but from what I can see they just do a "making a point" smashing of a melon or whatever and then nominate someone else.

I dont see the point.

I realise I will probably be flamed but we have a family member who fought and fought so hard to live, but cancer killed her, and she hated shit like this. She felt that by implying cancer was a thing you could shout at, beat up and win against, it also implied that anyone who lost that battle was somehow weak. Probably that is colouring my view on this.

[Bogeyface]

bippity

I agree that any fundraising is a good thing, but from what I have seen there is no fundraising attached to "smash shit up against cancer". If it was a case of "Give £10 to Cancer Research" and smashing shit up to publicise it, then great, but from what I have seen it is just smashing things.

I hope your dad gets well xx

[Bogeyface]

kittens it saddens me so much that a person who is dealing with cancer cannot be frightened and angry for fear of being seen as not fighting it. Its so wrong.

I think that the people who thought up this campaign did it from the best of motives but with no knowledge of the reality.

[ToastDemon]

The ice bucket challenge wasn't even meant to be for cancer. It was for Motorola Neurone Disease and got hijacked which must have diverted a lot of funds away from it.
I totally agree. My mother died of Non Hodgekins lymphoma. It wasn't a thing you can "stand up to". The doctors did their best but it killed her. I take offense at the implication that she didn't fight hard enough.

[ThoraGruntwhistle]

Totally agree. It's a horrible bastard illness, that has to be treated by doctors, not something that can be shouted down or stood up to. The idea that a person hasn't fought hard enough or has somehow 'let it win' if they don't get better is really insulting.

[PigletWasPoohsFriend]

I think this is only my opinion as my dad does feel as though it's a war, thats the attitude he believes got him into remission the 1st time so hope it's the same again!

I agree.

I am fighting it yet again and to me it is a constant battle.

[mrswhiplington]

Piglet

I had cancer 4 years ago. Underwent a mastectomy. Myself and the doctors and nurses just quietly got on with it. No amount crying or shouting helped me. Just the gentle support of others.

If people really want to help rid the world of cancer, give generously to cancer research. They are the ones really making the difference.

[maisiejones]

I work for a cancer charity and have banned the words beat, fight, win etc. from my staff's vocabularies. I absolutely hate these words in this context.

[AttilaTheMeerkat]

Bogey

I agree with you.

I detest with a passion all the battle analogies that are talked about around cancer and I blame the media for further using such language as well. I never heard such even a decade ago, let alone when my grandparents were diagnosed.

Nicknacky by the bucketload. My DH would have some idea of how you feel because his dad also died from a brain tumour.


(I was shocked to learn that cancers of the brain kills more people under the age of 40 than any other type; was this fact at all mentioned on C4 yesterday?)

[exLtEveDallas]

I liked the message from the Welsh Judo player (is player the right word? It sounds wrong)

He said (paraphrasing) that he treated Cancer like one of his matches - every match there was a winner and a loser, and one day he would be the loser (terminal diagnosis). But he wasn't going to stop training or playing (living) because of that. He'd just do what he could until the last bout.

Sometimes you don't have to 'fight' you just have to get on.

But what I really think: People with cancer, or with friends/family with cancer. Express yourself however the fuck you like. If that is wailing into a pillow - great. If that is smashing up a melon - great. If that is shouting "Fuck You Cancer" or "Kick Cancer in the Dick" or "Please leave me alone to die in peace" - great.

Do whatever works for you.

[Hassled]

I left the room when they started smashing things. I realise it may help some people - but using the smashing/fighting/battling analogies sort of implies that if you die from the bastard thing you just haven't fought hard enough, that you've failed, and that certainly wasn't the case for my mother. That's what makes me uncomfortable about it.

[user1476656305]

I also hate the 'battle' thing with cancer.
Just think if my mum had just 'fought' a bit harder she wouldnt have died of leukaemia.
What a load of rubbish.
I also find the personification of cancer really really silly.
'kick cancer in the back' 'we are coming to get you cancer' 'cancer doesnt want this or that'
Utterly pathetic/
Anyway it doesnt seem to be cancer that kills you but the medical treatment you get.

[Isitadoubleentendre]

I agree that this whole thing about 'fighting' cancer can imply that if you complain/cry/die then you aren't fighting hard enough.

But I also think that actually a lot of 'kicking cancers arse' and 'standing up to cancer' isnt about individuals illnesses but about raising money for research and new.treatments, which there was a lot of talk of last night as well.

I also agree that anyone who has had cancer, or has watched someone die of cancer can shout 'fuck you cancer' if they want. Adam Hills and that NZ Paralympic guy both lost parents to cancer, and it was AH dad who coined the 'kick cancer in the dick' thing, and if they want to smash things up, especially on telly where it might raise money for more research into treatment, then I do struggle to take issue with it.

[Isitadoubleentendre]

I also thought that the film about that little girl, Eve, was good because it didn't just show her as a 'smiling thumbs up cancer kid', it showed her crying in pain and upset when speaking to the doctor.

I know it's still quite far from the reality, but I hate the way that cancer and chemo, especially with kids, is almost romanticised. Like the child will go to hospital, be given some drugs, maybe vomit a bit and lose their hair, but they will smile through it all, and they will either lose or win their 'battle'. The reality of cancer and its treatment is so different.

[HelenaDove]

YY user147. I could not cope with taking steroids if i got ill.


A friends BIL has had 8 rounds of chemo but refused the steroids.