To ask for your definition of SuperMum?

[TheABC]

My son thinks I fit into that category when I produce an ice cream , but I would like to aim a little higher. What's your definition (and Superpower)?

[WeirdAndPissedOff]

Forgot to add - I hate the public competitive parents (think the ones who tell you/publish a story all about how amazing they are, how amazing and fulfilling their kids childhood is, all the fab things they do that other lesser parents don't).

However I do think people are entitled to pat themselves on the back now and then.

[Thatsmeinthecorner2016]

Not me. I'm a Supermum for my DD (at least for now) and that's what matters.

[WeirdAndPissedOff]

Any mum who tries to do right by their kids - no matter who you are parenting is a shit-hard job and getting through if makes you super in my books.
I would call someone a super-mum I'd I felt they had a more challenging parenthood, though. Eg dealing with disabilities, learning difficulties, bereavement, no support etc etc. (I hope that doesn't seem condescending)

[trilbydoll]

Always equipped with wellies when required and doesn't go out with wipes but no nappies or vice versa

[mygorgeousmilo]

A genuine 'supermum', to me, is any mum that doesn't call themselves supermum!! It drives me nuts when people hashtag themselves as #supermum, although most mums probably deserve the title - there's just something that grates when they say it to themselves

[sparechange]

A couple of posters have mentioned 'keeping them all alive'
Some of the most amazing mums I have met are ones who have kept their shit together, and their families together, while dealing with child illness and bereavement
They are superhuman, IMO...

[TitaniasTits]

It stands to reason that some women are better at being mums than others though, right? I mean, we can't all be good at everything, and some peoples skills must just lend themselves to parenting more effectively than others.

[thecatsarecrazy]

Well I don't know enough about Minecraft or Dan tdm to be super enough for my kids. My dh has bought tickets for insomnia next weekend. I have to go because we will already be away from home and my son told me he doesn't really want me there

[LaurieMarlow]

I gave birth (by C section ) and I've kept him alive and thriving this long. That's enough.

I don't do much in the way of crafts, my DS watches way too much TV, my house is a tip, my relationship with my husband not as romantic as it should be, I'm hanging onto a stressful job by the skin of my teeth, I wear the same three outfits day in day out.

I'm not interested in supermums. I'm interested in holding it all together. I agree it's a stick to beat women with and I wonder what prompted you to ask this question OP?

The competing expectations of motherhood, wifedom, the professional self, societal roles create a ridiculous pressure on women. 'Having it all' is a crock of shit, I constantly feel like a failure.

So terms like 'supermum' can go fuck themselves.

[Theimpossiblegirl]

My friend thinks I'm a supermum because I have one of those bags that always seems to have exactly what we need in it and I make a mean picnic.

My teen doesn't think I'm a supermum at all because I'm nosy and shout at tell her to tidy her room.

It's all relative.

[currentlyunavailable]

For me a super mum is someone with a welcoming house, where kids and their friends love to be, who is (pretty much) always patient and cheerful and doesn't seem to be stressed about little things, and who can be here for her kids when needed: taking them to all competitions and sports events, coping with any last minute school request (costume, art project, cakes...)

This kind of mums always seem to be good looking and have lovely well behaved kids. You can't even dislike them, it's annoying.

[AngieBolen]

I've only ever met one supermum.

She's a really lovely person with 5 DC.

The difference between her and us lesser mortals seems to be energy. She never seems tired, even when heavily pregnant and running after a toddler.

She is also naturally blessed with good looks, patience, enthusiasm and good taste.

I've heard "how does she do it?" muttered behind her back a good few times.

Her children are also the loveliest DC you could ever meet. She's definitely doing a fab job at parenting.

[NoCapes]

Thanks ABC yes everybody is fine now, we're having a very slow day today

[WhooooAmI24601]

I have a friend who works incredibly hard to be a 'super mum' and, as others have mentioned, her self-esteem is through the floor so she overcompensates by trying to be this spectacular woman who everyone can look up to and admire. She burned out this year, quit her job and is now being treated for quite severe depression. So I don't buy a lot of the 'super mum' stuff because often it's hiding something else.

I count myself as a super mum if I haven't shouted "what the fucking fuck" at anyone by 7pm. I love being around children, work full-time in a school and enjoy cooking and baking and crafts, so if friends visit there are always fresh cookies, paints ready to go and home-made playdoh. On the outside I'm sure folk look and think "shit, I don't do that" but the truth is, I hate playing with the DCs and struggle to force myself to sit on the lounge floor in a tent clutching a Playmobil pirate, waiting for them to attack me, and it drives me fucking bezerk when they dismantle everything in the house to build a den. Other parents I know sit and play for hours with their DCs. I just can't stand it. So whilst I've some strengths, I've also plenty of weaknesses. And it's fine to admit that and not be that perfect parents.

Also, by 7pm most evenings there's a bottle of wine open in the kitchen. That's how I survive parenting. That's how I'm super mum.

[MaddyHatter]

my DD said i was supermum for dealing with DS's very public meltdown in the middle of Barmouth last week, with all the other tourists judging looking on.

However, DS's idea of me as supermum is when i agree to sit down and play computer games with him.

[Boogers]

Ana spot on!

[AnaVanda]

Everybody fed. Nobody dead 😊

[user1471504509]

To me a SuperMum is someone who is present and makes time for their kids. You do that then you're awesome in my eyes.
I think you're a superdupermum when you have found things tough or faced PND and came through the other side or still keep fighting.

[TheABC]

No Capes , I hope everyone is feeling better now. Keeping three kids from implosion in A&E is bloody hard work!

lovelilies, chugger have done that to me before -sling, shopping everything! I reckon they see us as easy targets as we can't run away.

PrincessHairyNcClairy, interesting point. DS'S definition would include trains. I agree with your post about facades and the ultimate outcome of your parenting efforts. Assuming mine don't try to destroy the world first.

[TheABC]

Loving some of these -especially itcouldbeworse. Whilst I understand where posters are coming from on the "no such thing", I just hoped for lighthearted discussion.

RobiticSealPup, those sort of articles always felt fake to me too. And given to my toddler to shred

spare change, it's a nice motto, but in practice you would burn out!

SlowJinn, that sounds pretty damn Super to me.

[meck]

I'm with whoever said 'no such thing'

[AppleMagic]

It's a(nother) stick to beat women with.

[SlowJinn]

I was never a super mum. Just a mum. Battled with undiagnosed PHD. Struggled as a survivor of childhood abuse. My four beautiful children, all adults now, were, and are, my greatest achievement. And they make me proud every day. I just hope my issues didn't cloud their childhood too much.

[sparechange]

not my definition, but I read somewhere it's when 'you work like you don't have children and parent like you don't have a job'