to ask when you told your daughter about periods?

[alificent]

My daughter is 9 and so naive about everything. I love her innocence but wonder if I'm doing her a disservice by not having discussed periods yet. When did you discuss them with yours?

[pearlylum]

My mother was very old fashioned and valued innocence, her own and mine.
She told me nothing about periods. Luckily I had an older sister.

I remember once asking my mother what a smear test was and she described it as this:
"the doctor gets something like an umbrella and puts it inside your womb, opens it ans scrapes the inside of your womb"

She thinks that knowing too much about your body is dirty. My friends husband recently had a vasectomy, and my mother was there when my friend was discussing it. It was clear my mother though vasectomy and castration were the same thing, she said that our kitten had just recently had the same procedure, the removal of his testicles.
I really wouldn't want to rely on my mother for sexual heath information.

[DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen]

Ds was 4 or 5.

Thank God schools do the talk as clearly parents still aren't doing it!

You're child is MORE likely to remain ' innocent' if she has sex education as she can make informed choices.

[DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen]

I'd also be very surprised if she doesn't already know lots from the playground.

[noeffingidea]

My daughter has special needs so I didn't tell her.
However, I agree with other posters. If you are open and treat periods as part of normal life you won't need to make a big announcement about them.

[SquidgeyMidgey]

When she was 8. It's not about losing innocence it's just part of life.

[TaliZorahVasNormandy]

My DD is nearly 9 and has known about them for years. I've never hidden them and when she asked about them, I told her. She knows she'll get them one day and they are perfectly normal.

[SaucyJack]

I don't really know. I've never sat them down and had a formal chat.

But they're always coming in to talk to me when I'm in the bathroom so they've picked up enough over the years to know that it's a normal part of life for women.

[Lurkedforever1]

Dd was probably about 2/3 when she first asked about my tampax. So initial idea then and gradually expanded on it as and when as she grew. Just like any other bodily function. Knowing about the mechanics of puberty and reproduction at preschool age is nothing to do with innocence.

I do think by 9 they should know, one of Dd's friends started at that age in the school toilets. Because both were informed, dd simply went and quietly asked a female staff member to come with a towel. If they hadn't known, not only would her friend have been scared, but humiliated because dd would quite likely have ran off to publicly announce it to the first teacher she saw, under the impression her friend was injured.

[JasperDamerel]

I remember both my children wearing my (clean) moon cup as a teeny tiny hat when they were toddlers, so I'd guess they knew about periods by around the age of two.

[ThisisMajorTomtoGroundControl]

My five year old found out about them two weeks ago. I always answer their questions 100 per cent honestly, factually and age appropriately.

[Longtalljosie]

Within the last year - she's six. What do you say to her when she asks you what the tampons in your shopping basket are?

[corythatwas]

Do you have the same attitude of preserving innocence when it comes to other areas of knowledge about the world around her? Would you hold off telling her the name of the capital of Belgium or what elephants eat or what happens to water when you boil it, for fear of tampering with her natural innocence? And if not, why not?

If you give her the message now that you think reproductive functions are shameful and embarrassing, it is not going to be easy for her to ask your advice later.

[TheSparrowhawk]

Yes, I won't tell my children about how their food is digested until they're at least 12 because we don't want them to be 'guilty' of knowing things do we?

[puzzledbyadream]

My mum told me nothing about puberty. When I asked about sanitary towels in the shopping trolley I was just told "You'll find out when you're older." I found out most thing through guesswork, the dictionary and hearsay when I was about 9. My mum was really big on "protecting our innocence".

When it came to sex ed in school I was so convinced I wasn't allowed to know that I told the teacher I didn't think my mum wanted me to know! She then spoke to my mum and it turns out my mum was just leaving it to the school. Fortunately I was 14 when I started and well-versed by then.

I plan to tell my future children whenever they ask. I read something on here about describing how a woman grows a baby blanket each month and if no baby needs it it comes out. I really like that.

[TheWitTank]

My DD is ten and has had her periods for over 6 months now, so she knows all about them! I had explained what they were when she was 8.

[ghostyslovesheep]

they where all around 5 - they saw me changing a tampon etc and asked

DD2 had pubic hair at 7 so I'm glad I told her

they are all still innocent ffs!

[iammamam]

My girls are 4&7 and know basics, mummy bleeds from there sometimes and it means there's no babies in her tummy.
I started at 10 and no one had told me, I didn't go to the bathroom with my mum so I didn't know anything about and I was scared

[allowlsthinkalot]

My six and four year olds know about periods. Not sure what it's got to do with innocence unless you think women's bodies are seedy and disgusting?

[megletthesecond]

The 'sex talk' should have been done by 9 IMO.

[Oysterbabe]

Pretty sure I'd discussed it with friends in the playground by 9. My mum never discussed it with me but I had a big sister.

[NeedACleverNN]

My daughter is 3 and whenever she's come into the bathroom to see me changing a pad, she's had a look maybe asked a question and toddled off. I don't have periods now because of the coil but I'm coming off it soon for a different birth control so they will start again. I will carry on letting her see it and answering any questions. She will grow up seeing it as a completely normal bodily function. The same will happen with my son

[elfycat]

DD1 is 7. We covered periods a couple of years ago. Sex was last year. This week has been rape and paedophiles.

I answer her questions, let her reflect and come up with new questions. This week she asked what rape was as she caught the word on a radio broadcast (BBC I might add) so I explained that sex without permission is a nasty, nasty crime.

DH is resigned to them learning the truth about stuff nice and early (I pointed out that they will know it all well before they start dating). DD1 is sensible and understands not to talk about it with the other children at school, as she hasn't with periods and sex.

[dowhatnow]

I didn't actually tell either dd or ds, it just came up and talked about as and when, when they were very young.

[Emmaroos]

I couldn't agree more with homemama. My sons are 4 and 6. They have seen me using tampons and they know that 'big girls' have a little bit of blood every month and that it comes out from the same place as where a baby grows inside the Mum. Small bits of age appropriate information about reproduction (just as you would do about health, manners and everything else you need to teach them). To be honest, leaving it till a girl is 9 sounds a bit risky to me...I hate the thought of kids hearing this kind of information second hand from their peers.

[cmwife]

I told my 8yo recently. It was fine - except she then explained what tampons are for to my 2 yo. Now if Miss 2 sees a tampon she follows me about, brandishing it and demanding "put it in your 'gina".