AIBU about DD at baby ballet?

[justnotaballetmum]

DD goes to baby ballet. She concentrates for the first part of the session but then loses focus, wanders off and just dances (after a fashion) by herself. She's not in anyone's way and she's happy (likes the mirrors.)

One of the mums commented to me in quite a pointed manner last week and I'm a bit about going back now!

AIBU to think she's fine?

[justnotaballetmum]

I probably am overthinking it. I just hate it when I feel people are judging my parenting. I do try really hard but my line is 'is she being a nuisance' and if she isn't I let her get on with it. So there will typically be a circle of tiny little girls and mine is somewhere on the other side of the room roaming around :)

[Noodledoodledoo]

I feel the same at our baby ballet, my little one does enjoy it and not all the other little ones sit nicely.

My issue is my little girl is taller than lots of the others but is one of the youngest (she started as soon as possible - I wanted a class to be established to help when no. 2 turns up) because she is taller I spend the whole time thinking the other mums are thinking she is older than she is and badly behaved as they are all sitting nicely!

i have booked for another term but not shelling out for the kit just yet as I am not convinced its for her!

[LIZS]

If he wants her to do it you need to make him take her!

[Buggers]

Shea wandering off half the session than she's too young and yes it probably does distract the other kids if they are all standing still. What about a swimming class for her? Younger they are the easier it usually is for them to learn swimming.

[waitingforsomething]

I'm really sorry but I just don't understand why anyone takes toddlers to organised classes. It is almost guaranteed to end in a tantrum and they will learn exactly nothing. DD only ever enjoyed free-play playgroups or gym sessions at that age that might have ha 5 minutes of singing at the beginning or end.
She is 3.5 now and has only just started her first organised class which is swimming - I was hesitant even at her age but it's fine now. At 2 it would have been a disaster.
I would either do something much less structured or ignore any comments as there's not much you can do at that age.

[Buggers]

If she* not shea

[justnotaballetmum]

I think the other little girls are closer to three. Mine has only just turned two. That said, there's a couple who are a tiny bit younger than her. I think the concentration does dip but the others don't tend to start meandering around whereas mine does, so obviously this means everyone looks at her!

[OwlinaTree]

2 yo doing ballet😂 that teacher must have patience of a saint!! Bet it's cute to watch though.

[AngieBolen]

My DD struggled to conform in baby ballet. We gave up because I could clearly see I had not produced a natural ballet dancer. And the whole thing was just to painful to watch. Dd found great joy in having rebellious naughty toes.

With hindsight she was just too young.

[Buggers]

I do agree though there is no need for classes at that age but swimming is a valuable life skill so if you must do a class I'd advice that over ballet.

[PreciousVagine]

If she's enjoying it and the teacher doesn't mind her wandering about a bit, fuck the other parents judging you! People judge you for absolutely anything so it might as well be for letting your dd have a nice time.

[justnotaballetmum]

Shea and Amy

LIZS ha, not a chance! Too early on a Saturday for one thing and it IS a rather 'feminine' environment!

She's only little and she does love the teacher which is nice (and the teacher really is lovely - I can only dream of her levels of enthusiasm and perkiness!) it's just the wandering.

[AmyInTheBoonies]

There is a three year old at dd's Irish dancing class who is too young to be there and just runs in circles around the edge distracting my four year old!

It is annoying - I don't know why the parents persist in coming / paying.

However ballet is easier to teach to little ones and my daughter is in a mixed nursery class with two years olds and it works fine.

[blueberryporridge]

Unless she is actually distracting the other children or interrupting the class, I would keep taking her. It sounds as if she is enjoying it and she may well be taking things in even when she seems to be in a world of her own.

I would ignore the other mum unless your DD is causing problems. It would be worth double-checking with the teacher that she is not worried about what your DD is doing.

The idea of these classes is to introduce the children to music and movement, not to have them performing to Royal Ballet standard! If your LO is paying attention for some of the time then doing her own dancing for the rest of the time, I would say she is definitely getting something out of the class.

[ExtraHotLatteToGo]

You're DH thinking its 'cute' 😊

I understand where you are coming from re her just wandering about, playing in the mirror, not bothering anyone, but part of the value of these types of things is them understanding the rules & learning to follow them. Even at two they can understand that they need to do as they're told and not as they please - if you don't want to enforce that yet, then leave the BB for a little while. Tell DH she'll still be cute in 6 months 😁 It's really not fair on the other children to be doing as they're told while she's doing as they please, then another little one joins, sees your DD doing that and wants to do that instead and before you know it, there's total chaos!!

We did a couple of music things & it was a bit like hard work for me, but they loved going, Tumble Tots on the other hand was just wayyy too frustrating, so we went to the soft play/park instead 😁

[justnotaballetmum]

Angie, I have to admit I do worry a little bit about this - in a 'vaguely crossed my mind' way, not 'up all night fretting' you understand.

It's hard to tell, but she does look like me and if she takes after me shape wise then she will NOT have a dancer's body!

[pasbeaucoupdegendarme]

If she genuinely enjoys it and you're happy to keep taking her, I think you need to ask the teacher frankly if she's a pain - and maybe tell her that another mum had suggested that she was. If the teacher says it's fine, then you can confidently ignore the other mum.

[branofthemist]

I just hate it when I feel people are judging my parenting

sorry to say this...but get used to it.

Everyone gets judged. But once you have a child it seems to give the world a signal that you need more judging.

Happens all the time. And other parents are often the worst. My oldest is 12 and a few years go I ran out of fucks, for the judgy twats, to give and never felt better

[justnotaballetmum]

Am I being a bit too lax, ExtraHot? Do tell me, I can take it - I think I DO err on the 'permissive' side and she does have a strong will - she can tantrum like nobody's business, while her brother was far more placid.

She also invents stories about what the other girls supposedly said which I suppose could have annoyed this mum, but it seems unlikely!

[Onlyicanclean10]

If the teacher doesn't mind and your dd is happy I would ignore the silly cow.

Your dh sounds hilarious with teamwork at 2 though.

[girlinacoma]

If she is enjoying it and the teacher is happy then keep going.

I would struggle not to piss myself laughing if a sour-faced parent looked down their nose at my 2 year old not being able to concentrate for longer than five minutes.

[Alibabsandthe40Musketeers]

He wants her to go, so you get out of bed early to take her. WTAF is going on there??

Tell him to sod off.

[ExtraHotLatteToGo]

Actually. Are you sure it's not just your DH's way of getting a quiet house for a lie in every Saturday? Not so much DD being cute but you being cute not noticing this 😁😁

[branofthemist]

Oh and yes if your dh wants her to be cute at baby ballets he needs to take her.

Let him deal with the judging.

The hobby my ds does is dominated by dads rather than mums. It was me that wanted both Dd and ds to do it. I take them. Simple.

[justnotaballetmum]

We have other children so it's a break for me!

He wouldn't admit to it but I think it's the costumes he likes!