To be annoyed I get given less food because the cook thinks I need to lose weight?

[MrsAttending]

We have catering on site and the lady who serves it (2 days a week) always gives me less than my colleagues. On other days a different lady serves and I get the same amount.

She's very slim and always talking about diets etc. I need to lose weight and it's very noticeable that she agrees when she serves up my food. It's a set menu e.g. I'll be given two sausages and one scoop of mash) and my colleagues would get three sausages and two mash.

I know it sounds petty but I am just as hungry as they are!!

She came into the staff room about 5 hours after lunch and I was having a snack and she said "you're not eating again" as if I couldn't possibly be hungry after the tiny meal she gave me.
Then yesterday I was eaten a homemade biscuit given to me as a thank you and she saw me and said "I've seen you" like I had been caught doing something wrong.

AIBU to be annoyed she is treating me noticeably differently? I pay the same as everyone else! It's a small environment so can't really complain.

AIBU?

[Jelliebabe1]

Would loooooooove to know how this turned out it what happened next!!! 😁

[Catmuffin]

Any news op?

[BoboChic]

Seriously unprofessional behaviour. She is discriminatory and exercising judgement where none is required of her.

[Catmuffin]

Yes take a photo of yours and other peoples' meals. She may stop doing it without you needing to complain once she sees you collecting evidence

[StealthPolarBear]

Did she give you a look? The more I think about this the less I think you should care - what a little life she must have.

[pinkyredrose]

That's a great idea! She shouldn't get away with giving people more or less depending on what she thinks is they should have.

[MrsAttending]

I have only had desert served by her. I got the standard, regular portion so I can't complain although 2 colleagues got double serving of same desert.
Next week I am taking my phone down to photograph!

[Lweji]

Man up

It would be interesting to see if the OP showed up in man's clothes and a beard if she was then given a full portion.

[Beeziekn33ze]

Man up and tell intrusive moo to back off!

[Behooven]

Exactly lweji

There's also a huge rise in eating disorders so my eating half a willie winkie would you also expect people to come on tell me I'm too skinny gwen - either way it's no one else's business to police my food.

[Lweji]

f I started a thread all about how much I want to have that big portion, I'd expect some people to say it's too big a portion.

As nobody knows what other food the OP has during the day and what type of activity she does, nobody can say if it's too big or not.

[Gwenhwyfar]

"Why do other women love feel the need to comment (in a sanctimonious fashion often) about other peoples portions/meals."

Because Britain has an obesity problem and big portions are a part of that.

"If I wanted 5 sausages and mash and veg I'd have it,"

So would I, but if I started a thread all about how much I want to have that big portion, I'd expect some people to say it's too big a portion.

[Behooven]

Why do other women love feel the need to comment (in a sanctimonious fashion often) about other peoples portions/meals.
If I wanted 5 sausages and mash and veg I'd have it, if I wanted half a wee willie winkie and a hollow chip I'd have that too - and it's not anyone else's business.

[Monsterpage]

Is there a chance this member of staff could be doing to a chubby child at the school? This needs to be addressed before she gives kids at the school a complex.

I thought weight was included in all the equality and diversity stuff. Shows how much attention I paid at the one day course I did a month ago. Must try harder!!!

[upontheroof66]

What happened today op?

[Gwenhwyfar]

"I'm also disgusted some posters here are commenting on portion size here - judgey attitudes to womens' bodies even on Mumsnet. angry"

What do you mean 'even' on Mumsnet. Is MN supposed to be a place where large portions and being overweight is never questioned?

[ToomuchChocolatemeansBootcamp]

Am also waiting to see if OP gets full portion today. I am uncommonly annoyed by this woman's presumptive behaviour - how dare she!! I would also go with the "I'd like the full portion that I've paid for" line with a Paddington stare!

[BigChocFrenzy]

YANNNBU
That conduct is unacceptable and unprofessional
I'm also disgusted some posters here are commenting on portion size here - judgey attitudes to womens' bodies even on Mumsnet.
Irrelevant if you eat it all, bin some, or make it an artistic sculpture for posterity: You've paid for it.

Slam her down and don't consider her feelings, because she certainly doesn't care about yours.
Get the contact details of the caterers.

IF you feel able to face her, then the next time she serves you reduced amounts say:

"I will report you to your supervisor if you make shaming remarks again, or give me smaller meals than my colleagues. I want the full amount NOW !"

If she does anything other than give you the correct amount, hopefully with embarassed apology, then contact the caterers that same day.

IF you don't want to confront her, skip that step and go straight to contacting the caterers.

You can phone, or even EM with topic "for manager re serious complaint."
State the address of your school or whatever, then be blunt:

"One of your servers keeps making body-shaming remarks and serving me reduced portions instead of the full amount.
If you don't stop this unprofessional conduct immediately, I will escalate to an official complaint about your firm to my school"

[VestalVirgin]

Are you advocating wasting food then.? If I don't want to eat it I won't put it on my plate. People who take food and chuck it away really grind my gears.

In restaurants, you usually don't put it on your plate yourself.

And sometimes, you overestimate the amount you can eat.

I do think that the fact that when I was a child, my father would eat everything leftover from children's plates contributed to my healthy eating habits. I was never forced to eat everything on the plate, even if I had put it there myself. (Which is also not the norm in all families)

Besides, food is wasted already as all the not-so-pretty vegetables are sorted out and thrown into the compost before they even go to the supermarket. I don't see why I should make a martyr of myself in trying to make up for this massive waste of food ... and then have to go on diet after diet because I don't notice anymore when I am hungry and when I am not, because the natural instinct has been replaced by full plate - empty plate system.

Besides, if you face the problem at home, you can put the food in the fridge and eat it later.

[Catmuffin]

Op did update yesterday evening. I wonder if she'll get PITA woman serving today.

[Chippednailvarnishing]

Where is the OP?

[MoonfaceAndSilky]

OP, if you don't want to challenge this bitch woman, could you get your lunch with a colleague and they can ask her why you get less than everyone else?

[StealthPolarBear]

Although I disagree with a pp that she has no duties other than to dish up. Even if she only serves adults I'd have no problems with her saying something like "I noticed you often end up throwing out a lot of you dinner. Would you prefer a smaller portion". But obviously not to op who presumably isn't throwing out anything as she's only getting half portions to start :o

[StealthPolarBear]

I don't think this is discrimination. Weight is not a protected characteristic.
She's just a dick.

[Monsterpage]

Haven't read all the replies so a pols if repeated what others have said.

She is acting in a discriminatory fashion and under equality and discrimination you are well within your rights to go to your senior management team or if outside caterers her boss and tell them what is going on and you want it stopped.

Not only for you but what happens if she is doing the same to children giving them all manner of complexes. She shouldn't be near children if she thinks this is acceptable.