Aibu to possibly request meeting with nursery

[NeedACleverNN]

Dd (2 will be 3 in March) started a new nursery 3 weeks ago (today is her 3rd week) and she is coming home with suspicious bruising.

I'm not jumping to conclusions and suspecting anything too wild (unlike my dh who immediately asked what her Minnie looked like) but they are right at the top of her inner thighs near her nappy and are small finger shaped. Not really a place she could bruise by falling over

It could be the staff are a bit rough changing her nappy but even so this isn't on.

I'm going to fully check to her tonight before bed and again before sending her to nursery tomorrow and if she comes home with any new bruising, I was thinking of requesting a sit down meeting with the staff and asking directly how is she with nappy changes(she normally just lays there but I respect she might be a bit more wriggly at nursery) and how do they do it.

I really want to handle this sensitively and not accuse anything but if there is something going on I want to protect my daughter.

What would you do?

[Goingtobeawesome]

It's a red herring, and a dangerous one, to say that a child would be clingy if they were being hurt at nursery and show signs of not wanting to go. Of course some children would be like this but not all.

[rainbowstardrops]

Most would. I've worked in various child care settings for 25 years. Children usually say/show when they're scared or unhappy.

That works both ways too. I've seen kids point blank refusing to go home!

Lots of kids come into school because they're upset about leaving mum, hamster, whatever. As an experienced child care worker and mother, I honestly think a child would show signs of being distressed if something untoward was going on.

Obviously not all the children are the same. OP did say her child was able to communicate. Careful questioning would be the key.

[Lndnmummy]

Feel for you op. My ds went to a nursery where he repeatedly came home with bruises and bad scratches to his face. It was awful and not once could staff tell me what had happened to him. Once his dad had enough and demanded to find out what had happend. Managar looked him straight in the eye and said "oh lndnbaby had that on his face when he came in, it must have happend at home". We gave our notice there and then. At best it shows terrible neglect on their behalf to not be able to keep the children safe.
He has been with a new nursery for 6 mnths and we have had 2 bruises/marks in those 6 mnths. At both times there has been an incident report and a good explanation to what occured. First time a child bit him and second time he scratched his face as he picked up a football behind some bushes.

[Ironfloor]

Yeah, in DD's nursery also, there was an accident boo. Where everything was recorded and the parents had to sign it at pickup time.

[Chinks123]

I think you've done the right thing, I would of removed her from nursery too. It's scary not knowing what your child is doing all day and you have to have real trust in the nursery. All toddlers bruise, my DD's little legs are always bruised but you can tell they are just from falling over, riding her scooter etc. The picture you posted worried me a little it looked very dark and similar to a bruise I got myself when I was nipped very hard on the thigh. Hope you manage to get her settled somewhere you can feel really secure with

[PagesOfABook]

Not true at all that very young children will act obviously sad or distressed if they are being treated badly. I know from personal experience unfortunately.

[Goingtobeawesome]

I agree with you Pages and I am sorry for your experience. Also shared.

.

[Ironfloor]

Any update OP.

[Ironfloor]

?