to not know what to do about my eating habits or my weight?

[FeedMyFaceWithJaffaCakes]

Hello everyone.
Posted this a couple of places, as really need advice.
I have tried SW (slimming world) three a few times and failed every single time.
I'm quite fat. 5'4 and (I haven't the nerve to get on the scales) but probably about the top end of the 12stones...
I think the reason I'm failing is because I don't eat very much, is in I eat little potions of good and healthy food. Even though some of it like chicken, tuna jacket potatoes, leafy salad and avocado I love. I just don't always feel hungry. Sometimes I go days without eating anything, especially If I'm tired/stressed/anxious (delete as appropriate!) I enjoy big meals if I go out (to somewhere like nandos approx. Once a week) and will always have three courses if there's something I fancy if we go to a pub (that's probably more like once a month though)
I've never ever eaten breakfast, I leave the house at 6.15am every morning and the idea of eating then makes me feel physically ill. I'm sure I don't drink enough either.

I love chocolate and biscuits and cake and can easily eat a share bag of malteasers to myself.
I don't do any exercise at all and I hate all forms of exercise, except swimming which I do quite like.
I'm a nurse so I do spend all day on my feet but I'm not really sure that counts!!
So really, I'm just asking, do you think I should try SW again?
Or is there another diet healthy eating plan that might be more effective?
I know I need to do something, but I'm not sure of the most effective solution.
Because I can't go on like this.
I want to look beautiful in my wedding dress. 

The flavoured water is most likely full of sugar.

All this for lunch?! "mackerel salad with five baby potatoes, a boiled egg, 2 tbsp of hummus, two crackerbread, an avocado, a yoghurt, a naked bar, a Heinz cups soup, fruit in jelly, a packet of choc gems."

And still buying cans of Coke?

Why post for advice if you're then going to ignore it all??

Whatever changes you make must be small and you need to commit to making these changes for the rest of your life. I hate the word diet, and by following one, you will set yourself up to fail. Decide on a lifestyle change - a small one, and stick to that. Once that change becomes a habit, made another small change. I'd start with the processed carbs - cakes, biscuits, sweets, coca cola. A drastic change will never work long term, so start by limiting. Next, I'd work on the hating exercise bit - a brisk walk everyday is not onerous, and will make you feel great.

Your eating habits are pretty dire - you claim to eat very little, but I think what I am reading is that you eat very little real food but make up for it in the nutritionally empty junk. I'm not sure why you bring a smorgasbord in for lunch - why not just stick to one thing and fill up on it? Picking at different foods actually will result in you eating more so I'd avoid doing this.

Additionally, you need to address your addiction to sugar. To me, the quantity of junk sugar you eat is astounding, and the fact that you can eat an entire packet of maltase's meant for multiple people in one go point to a disordered relationship with sugar. I don't limit sugar, but more than 3 malteasers makes me feel sick as it really has little flavour beyond sickly sweet and I could never drink more than a quarter can of Coke due to the huge sugar hit. Until you deal with why you abuse sugar, you will not lose weight in any permanent manner.

Im sorry but all that for lunch? Far too much.

One avocado with pepper does me most days.

The OP very clearly said she wasn't going to eat all of that, but wanted options. Don't let that stop you guys criticising, obviously.

OP, I eat like you - small healthy meals, skip meals, don't mind being hungry, then I compensate with empty sugar and refined carbs. I agree with everyone saying try and ditch the sugars. I know you're worried about feeing deprived, but the thing about sugar is that the more you have, the more you want. If you can switch to only natural sugars, you will genuinely NOT feel deprived within a couple of weeks. It's a huge difference. Once you've given up the sugary drinks and chocolate and jelly and things, you can basically eat whatever you want and not worry about it too much, I think. Your eating habits are fine when it comes to meals, it's the snacks that do you in.

(Also, a lot of teetotallers/near teetotallers are sugar fiends!)

Do you like soup?

One change only - give up suger. That will force you to get your calories from healthier food choices .

I sympathise , working shifts left me eating the same as you , stopping suger cured all manor of evils .

I have knee problems and walk like a marathon runner for an hour a day. If I didnt do that I'd be at least a stone heavier.

Have your thyroid and liver functions tested several times over a few months. It can take more than one test to pick up any problems. But it does sound like you are heavy for what you eat, plus your job. (Unless there is a new type of nursing where you just sit around for a whole shift.)

I think it's worth calculating how many calories you actually need - for example I'm 5'8" abd relatively active abd I only need 1879 calories a day, more than that and I'll gain weight. You're much smaller and likely need much less so it will only take a small amount of Coke/chocolate to tip you into a calories excess. The idea that the average woman needs 2,000 calories a day is a bit of a myth. You can check your calorie requirement here
tdeecalculator.net

If you use mfp for a few days you'll probably see that you're hitting your calorie requirement with relatively little food/drink as your food choices are sugary and calorie-dense

Goodness, why are people being so critical? It's a start. I think it's a great start. Ok there are some foods in there that ideally should be left out but doing it all at once is daunting and more likely op will throw the towel in! I'd go for that and then next week try and drop something else eg the sugary drinks. Take it slowly.
Good luck op you're doing brilliantly

Just catching up with this thread.

I am a failed and successful dieter. My weight ranges from 10 to 14 stone. Apart from being pregnant I am the heaviest I have ever been.

I have a good long think about why I am fat at the moment. Like I said further up the thread I genuinely don't eat a lot. And actually enjoy healthy food more than crap. My problem the last few years has been bfing for 18 months and then alcohol. I am really cutting down on the alcohol this month. And working on moving around more. And have ditched the sweetener in coffee.

They are my 3 small things to achieve this month. I have lost 3lbs already (in a week).

The alcohol is a pretty big thing for me. So I need to consolidate that before I move into something else.

When I think back to when I was a proper size 10 I only drank at weekends, ate homecooked foods and was busy all the time at work.

So that's what I am aiming to do again. But if I try and do too much at once I will lose weight but also motivation. This is why the diet industry is worth millions. Because we all succeed then fail.

Look back to a time in your life when you were happy with your weight and think about what has changed and try to implement one change. Consolidate that then move on to the next thing.

Looking at your food diaries I would ditch the fizzy drinks full stop. Water or well diluted juice. Apart from anything else they are terrible for your teeth. Even diet or sugar free flavoured waters are bad.

Then when you are confident that you have that under control look at how much sugar and processed snacks you are having. So chocolates and biscuits. Get rid of those then move onto the next thing which would be for me white bread/pasta. So processed carbs.

You won't lose lots of weight quickly but it will come off and you will be healthier for longer.

But when you lose something you can't replace it with something else. So don't ditch the coke then take up wine!

I think potentially you're not eating enough. Your metabolism slows to a standstill if you eat below your basal metabolic rate(bmr) You need to find out your total daily energy expenditure (tdee) and your bmr, work out if you need to reset your metabolism, and then cut 10-15% off your tdee and work in some weights.

forums.eatmore2weighless.com/showthread.php?tid=12114&page=22

Okay so I am not going to listen to all these people slating me.
I'm going to say this once.*
This is my thread, I posted here for general encouragement. Not to be told off like a small child for what I choose to take for lunch, when it's clear I'm trying to make changes.*
With that out the way, rather pleased with myself today.
Here is what I've eaten so far:
Didn't get a chance to eat my oats as did the Drs Round and had my first and only break at 13.30.
I ate: my mackerel salad, boiled egg, only managed 3 baby potatoes, 2tbsp hummus, nakd bar, choc gems, 150mls of coke.

I'm going to have chicken stir fry for tea and take the rest for dinner tomorrow as I'm on a late.
Lots of to all the lovely posters who are being so supportive of my journey to healthiness. You're diamonds!! X

Feeding. You should start your day and metabolism with REGULAR portions of food. Like giving meds. You need a bit of food almost every two hours 0800, 1000, 1200, 1400,1800

Snap with dinner, I had stir-fry tonight as well :)

Doing a radical overhaul of your diet is rarely a good idea unless you medically have no choice. And there's nothing wrong with a treat occasionally either. Some people on here are acting like the occasional slice of cake means you can never be healthy again

You're doing well, OP. Small, baby steps. The important things to remember are fruit and veg, drink plenty of water, healthy snacks and the occasional treat. And lots of protein!

Good luck (again!).

Feeding. You should start your day and metabolism with REGULAR portions of food. Like giving meds. You need a bit of food almost every two hours 0800, 1000, 1200, 1400,1800

Most people will never manage that. I don't know any jobs that let you wander off and eat every two hours!

Hello hermonie I've been wondering about you! How are you!?
I'm just cooking mine now :)
I know I'm like to that- couldn't live without cake occasionally and I'm just trying to take it day by day!
X

Yes, good thanks :) Well done for sticking to it, my weakness is the vending machines at work with cheap chocolate, although I've resisted so far this year!

I find if I bring my own healthy food, I'm less likely to buy crap at work. Kind of like, if the food isn't around, I can't eat it, and I'm too lazy to go out and buy more lol.

You'll be fine, nothing wrong with a few treats!

My office job lets me eat whenever I want, as long as I've brought the food with me. That's not particularly unusual.

OP, you've been given some great ideas here but a lot of them contradict each other. So some people have said do calorie-counting or low fat food. Some have said low carb. Others have suggested cutting out one thing at a time. All these approaches work, but you have to pick one and then do it religiously. What do you fancy? Do you think you could calorie-count everything you eat? You don't honestly sound like you have time, and you really don't sound like someone who would go for low carb. So the sensible eating/cutting down on 1 thing at a time approach might work for you. Or you might like the 5:2 where you eat very little on 2 days a week (no more than 500 calories) but can eat normally (within reason) the other 5.

I'm sure there are other options out there - I just think you should pick an approach that you think you could stick to for a long time, whatever that approach might be. Good luck!

Hermonie we have chefs at work (I work in a hospice) who will make us lunch if we ask, but it's all delicious and unhealthy baguettes and things like that.
Currently chomping on my stir fry now. Going to have a cup of tea and Angel slice afterwards.
Need to find some inner strength from somewhere to get on a set on scales at some point.
It's going to be dreadful.

OP I'd consider reading one of Susie Orbach's books before joining a diet. Her book Susie Orbach on Eating and her more famous Fat is a Feminist Issue blew my mind!

I had a very dysfunctional relationship to food and it has totally helped me to do something really basic: eat when I'm hungry, stop when I'm satisfied. I lost weight very naturally as a result and I'm never going on a bloody diet again!

I'm sure the weight loss organisations will help you shift the weight but for the long term, you've got to kick the unhealthy and unhelpful habits.

Well done
Just try to reduce on the last three slowly but surely
Mackerel and hummus good for protein!
I would also try 5:2 I even eat up to 700 my usual is twice that and I'm still losing weight
Another thing I'm realising to watch out for is salt! I love a stir fry too
Also to add bulk to your stir fry look into these carbless rice/spaghetti/noodles which you can but from Holland and Barrett they really work but have hardly any calories as its plant protein one just had some now and it's filled me up

Hi OP,

Read the whole thread and think you're doing great.

Saw that you don't like breakfast - so don't force yourself to eat it. There's a recent thread about someone who lost a stone in a month or something just not eating breakfast! I'll try and find the link. If you are not hungry, don't force yourself to eat.

Don't think low carb would work for you.

I do reckon 5:2 would though.

Make small changes : yes Coke is sugar, but a tiny can is better than falling spectacularly off the wagon and drinking a 2 litre bottle. We all need a treat.

And keep the avocado, mackerel and spuds FFS!

Thanks toffee and Yo
I'm really trying my hardest.
I'm on a late tomorrow so have packed my naked bar and my stir fry ready :)

Will post tomorrow with what I eat!

skip breakfast thread

Yes, don't force yourself to eat if you're not hungry. I often have "breakfast" mid-morning because I can't face anything more than a coffee first thing in the morning!

How's it going today? :)