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AIBU?

To wear white tomorrows wedding?

29 replies

Pohtaytoh · 23/07/2015 19:10

Short story- i have a wedding tomorrow, still bf so my dresses are no good. Settled on a blue pencil skirt here but I can't find a top that goes with it. I've just made my umpteenth and final trip to town and come back with a white lace off the shoulder top. Can i wear it? Any ideas i may be missing in my wardrobe?

Disclaimer I wouldn't have cared if someone wore white to my wedding, infact i picked a white wedding dress for my Mum to wear (she rocked it).

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CuttingOutTheCrap · 23/07/2015 22:11

I think its fine too.

Could it be a bit tricky to bf in though as it looks to be quite tightly fitted? I have bf in off the shoulder tops (pull top down slightly, scarf draped to cover as needed) but I have a couple of similar lacy tops and don't think i could manage it in those.

Hmmm, might have to try that now, it's been aaaaages since I wore my lovely black lacy top.......

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wafflyversatile · 23/07/2015 22:10

I think it will be ok. People will see you before you sit down so know you're not wearing all white. And when you are sitting down it won't be at the top table. Just to make double sure have a few conversations with people along the lines of 'I love your dress. I had real problems finding something to wear while breastfeeding and ended up having to buy this top just yesterday. I was a bit worried about it being white but everyone on mumsnet said it would be fine.' Wine

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cerealqueen · 23/07/2015 22:09

A little scarf french style to pick out the blue and white would look lovely!

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TheAnswerIsYes · 23/07/2015 22:02

I think it's a lot more relaxed here. I got married in a Catholic church in Malta and bare shoulders in church is definitely not okay there.

With regards to that white top I think it would be fine but I would break up the white with a coloured shawl or brightly coloured jewellery or something.

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annandale · 23/07/2015 21:09

Shoulders covered at dinner and church is what I grew up with but am beginning to feel very old and crusty on these things...

I would drape a scarf around to break up the colour and the shoulders.

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LazyLohan · 23/07/2015 21:04

vvviola, your mates Mum fell for the oldest con trick in the wedding dress sellers book.

A couple tried that on me when I was choosing. They told me that the Catholic Church in Ireland (where I married, but I'm English) would disapprove of a strapless dress and I had to buy a shawl too. I didn't end up buying anything from those shops or anything strapless.

But it came up in conversation with the priest marrying me who was very old and very traditional and he said it was absolute nonsense and nobody would bat an eyelid. But he did say that he had been contacted by several brides before who had asked the same question (if bare shoulders were a problem) and it was always because a salesperson had told them that while pushing an expensive shawl on them.

I also have a relative who is a C of E vicar and I asked him out of curiosity and he said he had exactly the same thing several times.

I've reached the conclusion that because wedding dress sales people work on commission they see that as a convenient way of getting people to buy an unnecessary and expensive extra which will bump up their pay packets.

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LazyLohan · 23/07/2015 20:20

That should be fine. But there is one thing I think you should check with the bride first. An awful lot of brides are going for lace shouldered/sleeved tops a la Kate Middleton, Nicky Hilton, Emily McDonagh. It is a trend at the moment and something that is very common.

I would check with the bride that is not what she is going for. The only reason I can see that top being a problem is if it's just too similar to the top of the brides dress.

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vvviola · 23/07/2015 20:12

I know captainfarrell mine was too - but some churches still seem to be strict about it. I was a bit Shock when the mother of the bride told me. But I do now tend to avoid off-the-shoulder for church weddings now just in case

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captainfarrell · 23/07/2015 19:58

Off the shoulder??? Ha ha , most wedding dresses these days are strapless!

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CactusAnnie · 23/07/2015 19:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BringMeTea · 23/07/2015 19:55

Totally fine.

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vvviola · 23/07/2015 19:54

It'll be fine.

Although if it's a church wedding the off-the-shoulder might be frowned on. (Oddly, my Irish Catholic church has no problem, but friend was married in Church of England ceremony and had to get a shawl for her off the shoulder dress. Guests were quietly warned by mother of the bride that bare shoulders would not go down well)

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green18 · 23/07/2015 19:48

White blouse is quite a bit different to a white wedding dress, sitting down or standing up. What about men in white shirts?Only a bridezilla would notice tbh. Have a great day

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SantanaLopez · 23/07/2015 19:46

Can you really breastfeed in the top?

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SantanaLopez · 23/07/2015 19:44

when you are sitting down at the church or at the table in a white lacy off the shoulder top then from the waist up it will look like you are wearing a wedding dress

This, unless you have a jacket or something over the top?

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BikeRunSki · 23/07/2015 19:43

It'll be fine.

Not like my sister who wore white to mine and both our brothers's weddings. And hers.

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nulgirl · 23/07/2015 19:43

How much time are you going to be standing for because when you are sitting down it will look like you are in a wedding dress?

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ftmsoon · 23/07/2015 19:41

That top in white with a blue skirt will be fine. I would only be pissed off if you came in a white dress that could appear to be trying to take the focus off me.

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nulgirl · 23/07/2015 19:40

I know that your skirt is blue but surely when you are sitting down at the church or at the table in a white lacy off the shoulder top then from the waist up it will look like you are wearing a wedding dress? Would have thought that was a bigger faux-pas than just wearing a white outfit

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Pohtaytoh · 23/07/2015 19:38

Must be new new in store because i cant find a pic online but it's like this only white obvs. The bride is lovely and not at all bridezilla, but i just wanted to check!

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crazykat · 23/07/2015 19:37

That sounds fine.

If it was a white top and white skirt then no but a white top and blue skirt is fine.

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AuntyMag10 · 23/07/2015 19:30

I think it's fine, the skirt is blue so will not clash with the bride.

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ListenWillYou · 23/07/2015 19:29

Sounds ok to me. Have a great day.

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Tuskerfull · 23/07/2015 19:26

Depends how Bridezilla the couple are, but I think this would be fine.

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HoldYerWhist · 23/07/2015 19:15

I think it's fine because you're wearing a blue skirt! Can you link a picture of the top.

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