A SAHM walks into a bar...

[Magalouf]

And goes to order a round, when one of the guys in the round comes up and says 'I'll get these, I've got a job'.

AIBU to be pissed off! I said it's fine I got it, but he was pretty insistent. I didn't want a scene. He's a friend of DH, who wasn't there at the time.

[Stealthpolarbear]

But surely sahms are sahms because the family income allows it?
I'm sure loads if them have more disposable cash than I do

[Shodan]

IMO, 'I'll get these' = friendly gesture.

The addition of 'I've got a job'= patronising.

[Magalouf]

Ha! If a woman said that I'd think she was a thunderc£*t!!

[FenellaFellorick]

"Thanks. I'll have a quadruple whisky."

If someone wants to spend money being an arse, bloody let them.

[ihategeorgeosborne]

Maybe he fancies you and wanted to buy you a drink!

[Stopandlook]

Being on mat leave is different - it's a temporary change in circumstances. If I'd just lost my job I wouldn't be offended if male or female friends offered me a pint. But I would never say to a SAHM I'll pay for something she was about to because I have a job. Ignorant and patronising grr.

[tulipgrower]

Surely some are SAHM's because the child care costs don't make working worthwhile, and some can't return to jobs which are incompatible with having small children. Ideally the move to become a SAHM has been well planned. But in some of the cases I know, the decision still required significant belt tightening.

[Mintyy]

There are plenty of sahms with more disposable income than their friends (male and female) who have jobs.

It was a knobbish, stupid, arrogant, twat-faced thing to say.

[Stealthpolarbear]

Do you not think it's rude to assume? I think it's natural to assume that if someone is recently out of work or on mat leave they will have less money than before but to assume (and tell thwm) that you have more money because you work?

[tulipgrower]

I think it's rude to say "because I've got a job", but I think the intention may still have been well intended. ( I know a lot of socially- challenged nerds who have hearts of gold, but would probably blurt out the job part)

[ihategeorgeosborne]

You don't think it could have been his attempt at a joke?

[Timetoask]

I met up with an old male friend sometime ago, when I told him I was currently a sahm he said "oh so you're a kept woman", !!!! Made my blood boil.

[windchime]

I work part time as a nurse and I have friends who are very rich and often pick up the tab when we go out. I do not take offence as they are dear friends. Pride comes before a fall.

[fredfredgeorgejnr]

Round buying is a tricky thing, and one of the responsibilities as a member of the round who has significantly more disposable cash is to engineer things such that you buy more rounds without it being unnatural.

Let's be generous to the guy and assume this was his attempt, and he simply failed in how he did it, he knew the idea, but not the exact practice.

[Prettyinblue]

My friends and I often buy for each other but that's when know the other one is skint.

Think it depends if he is usually a bit of a knob.