Fanta - in your situation, I am Eve and dh is Adam. Right from the word go, we have had a joint account - that's the only current account either of us has, so everything goes through it - the direct debits and standing orders, and then we both have debit cards so we have the same access to the money.
Dh is very good at financial modelling, planning and tracking - he has a spreadsheet that tracks his income, all the fixed outgoings each month, and then he splits up what is left - we have notional budgets for car and petrol, clothing, food, family fun, and he and I each have an allowance (we get the same amount).
If we get a big, unexpected expense, he will juggle money round the budgets - take a bit out of petrol money, for example, if we haven't used as much as normal, and use it to put a bit extra into food, if we are having guests. Or, if I want to myself to something a bit more expensive, he will let me 'borrow' against future allowance money, and he can do the same.
Whilst he is in control of the money - because he is better than I am at keeping track of what's come in and gone out, and what is going to need to go out in the future - and whilst I do ask him before I spend a larger sum of money, I can get at the spreadsheets and records whenever I want, and feel as if I am an equal partner in the relationship.
I feel it works well for us, I don't feel controlled or that he uses my non-earner status as a 'hold' over me. Your friend Eve is in a very different, and potentially abusive situation. At the very least, there should be a joint account, so she can make purchases for the household without having to go cap in hand to Adam. That is more than unfair, in my opinion - it is plain wrong.