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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Not not like the term guys

78 replies

GingerbreadBaubles · 25/05/2015 04:57

Hi guys table for 2?
What can I get you guys to drink?
Thanks guys
If you guys want to wait a minute someone will be with you shortly

I hate it! Please stop.

OP posts:
Pipbin · 25/05/2015 11:28

How about using the word "children"?

"Come on, children, time to get back to the classroom"? I'm not a Victorian governess.

Nope, I do use 'chaps' sometimes too.

Fluffyears · 25/05/2015 11:42

Our boss dies it and I have picked up the habit which I hate. Even worse was at school a representative from a local college kept referring to us as 'guys and gals'!

Andrewofgg · 25/05/2015 11:45

Pipbin I think Children is of German origin; it may be out of date now but at one time anyone could address a group of people regardless of age and gender as Kinder.

ChristmasEnthusiast · 25/05/2015 11:55

I don't like "children" at school, it sounds a bit cold to my ears (possibly because I've heard it used repeatedly in a condescending tone by a head teacher).

I do use 'girls and boys' sometimes, and ocassionally 'people'. Also everyone, folks, room 2, primary 7, and once with a very lovely small group on a trip 'right gang, this way!'

ScarlettDarling · 25/05/2015 12:11

I'm a teacher and I use 'guys', 'girls and boys' , 'gang', 'year 2' and 'right, everybody'.

I like guys, it's friendly!

ShakesBootyFlabWobbles · 25/05/2015 12:17

YABU it is fine.

Don't know what you guys are getting frothed up about.

Pipbin · 25/05/2015 12:20

Folks is a good one, I use that too.

Libitina · 25/05/2015 12:22

I use this term at work when I need to get the attention of the whole operating theatre ranging from students upto consultant surgeons and anaesthetists for the brief and debrief of every operation. It's a good 'catch-all' and I find it less offensive than the derogatory 'you people' that I know someone else uses, even though I question it every time grrrrr.....

juliascurr · 25/05/2015 12:35

did you see that guy on TV? She was talking about the EU
misgendered
'guys' is hideous

BackforGood · 25/05/2015 12:38

Well, YAN being unreasonable to dislike it - if it grates for you then it grates, but personally I don't mind it at all.

But then, I don't get offended as easily as many MNers do.
I'm quite happy with guys, chaps, people, ladies, and will commonly call people I'm meeting "the girls" even though we are quite ...ahem... mature now.

Theycallmemellowjello · 25/05/2015 13:05

Oh wow, I had no idea anyone was annoyed by this! I use this, indiscriminately of gender. what's a better alternative? 'Ladies'/'gentlemen'/'ladies and gents'/'folks' all sound a bit cringey to my ear...

CrystalMcPistol · 25/05/2015 13:09

Fuss over nothing.

LadylikeCough · 25/05/2015 13:18

I wouldn't use it in writing, but it's surprisingly difficult to find (as Libitina called it) an informal 'catch-all' to use when speaking to a group of people. 'Guys' does grate but everything else is worse.

'Good morning, people': you sound like a cartoon alien ('greetings, humanoids')
'Let's go, men': WW2 captain mustering troops
'Well, ladies/girls': like madam/ma'am/miss, someone's going to feel aged up or down
'If you women could just...': over-familiar UKIP politican
'What do you folks...': ingratiating Southern (US) politician

'Time to go, children': Mary Poppins
'Hello boys': Wonderbra
'Are you chaps...': Hugh Laurie in Blackadder

'Everyone' and 'everybody' are passable, but somehow seem better suited for reproaches and bossy instructions: EVERYONE OUT, everyone calm down, we're not leaving until everybody gives me their finished essay.

I quite like Missy Elliot's 'whussup, fools' as a mass salutation, though.

Andrewofgg · 25/05/2015 13:27

Good morning, all

I don't think that offends anybody, or does it?

Malenky · 25/05/2015 17:03

I don't like it, not because it is mis-gendering women but because it's very over-familiar if it comes from a stranger. I am usually formal and polite with people I don't know so when people are overly matey with me as if it doesn't matter I feel a bit disrespected especially as a customer.

greeneggsandjam · 25/05/2015 19:06

I have always really disliked it. What I hate more is when someone says 'guy' as in, that guy over there'. It just gives me that screeching chalk on a blackboard feeling. Argghh.

TheHumourlessHarpy · 25/05/2015 20:30

This reply has been deleted

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AnImpalaCalledBABY · 25/05/2015 20:38

I Like it, it works well in lots of situations

I hate 'folks' though so swings and roundabouts Grin

manicinsomniac · 25/05/2015 20:39

I use it all the time, especially to refer to a mixed sex group. It's just easy. Never heard anyone object to it before.

I don't mind ladies either

The only thing that really gets to me is girls and boys being used for adult men and women.

Andrewofgg · 25/05/2015 23:38

manicinsomniac On the rare occasions when a meeting I convene is all male I sometimes say Morning boys or morning fellers - it depends on the audience. But by definition I am not giving offence to women if there are none there - am I?

manicinsomniac · 26/05/2015 00:53

No, of course you aren't - what have I said that makes you think I would find that offensive to women?

The only think I wouldn't like about that is calling adult men 'boys' - I find it patronising, personally. Same with calling women 'girls'.

No issue at all with 'fellers'

SnowyPiglet · 26/05/2015 01:20

I think 'guys' is alright in an informal setting (Pizza Express or suchlike)
'Everyone' or 'Everybody' is much better and more normal.
'Girls' for adult women is patronising and I hate it.
'Ladies' is fine (for that is what we are!)
I work mostly with males, and have been called a 'chapess' before now by my colleagues, (which I think is ok, actually, but would understand if others found it annoying!)

Pipbin · 26/05/2015 08:47

My dad used to use chaps and chapesses, Snowy I quite like it and use it with friends.

SuburbanRhonda · 26/05/2015 10:32

In our school, our HT would never address the children as "guys" or "gang".

She's about as far from a Victorian governess as you could possibly imagine Smile.

watchingthedetectives · 26/05/2015 10:48

Ladies is awful and seems to have a patronising tone to it, any other option is better. I find guys while not ideal is much less irritating

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