Aibu to be unsure about these photographs?

[CanisSapiens]

Whilst I applaud the girl and her mother for trying to change peoples perception of people with Down's Syndrome, and the girl looks lovely, something about the underwear shots in particular don't sit well with me. But I am quite prepared to be told that I am wrong.

www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3081890/If-people-beauty-inside-models-world-syndrome-Meet-inspiring-young-woman-genetic-condition-determined-change-face-beauty.html?ito=social-facebook

[CalleighDoodle]

Im not keen on the swimwear one as i dont think it is a particularly nice bikini. The other photos are great.

[thornrose]

Agreed, it absolutely isn't helpful or meaningful. I've never felt the need to use it as shorthand. Emotional age maybe but mental age, no!

[ArgentinianMalbec]

I love this. Brilliant, good on her - she looks great. No reason she can't do all the same things as other young women her age. How refreshing!

[RedButtonhole]

I think she looks great- I wish I'd had such confidence at her age.

People with Downs Syndrome are able to live independantly, have jobs, date, get married. She is an adult, there is no reason why she shouldn't be able to decide to model as a career.

[Morloth]

She is obviously an excellent model because I am wondering where she got her trousers.

She isn't a child.

[GrumpyKitty]

I think she probably looks a damn sight better in that bikini than most people with genuinely negative opinions would in it!
She's a very pretty girl, and to lose nearly 4 stones despite a predisposition to be heavier is quite impressive, why shouldn't she show off her achievement?

[PrimalLass]

Even the DM comments are more supportive than your OP.

[thornrose]

My dd is beautiful, boys/young men are starting to look at her in that way.

I sometimes think her life would be easier if her difficulties were more apparent. I know that sounds wrong, sorry.

[millionsmom]

Their chronological age and their mental - or IQ - age doesn't match.

Even if her IQ puts her higher than 'normal' Downs of 50 - the IQ of a 8 or 9 year old - it's unlikely to be that of a regular 18 year old. That's the concern for me. I wouldn't be happy seeing an 8, 9, 10, 11, 12 year old/young teen like that.

[Pagwatch]

I think it's good that you posted this with a view to being told you are wrong. I think feeling something is uncomfortable and then trying to examine why is a good thing. So I applaud you for challenging your thinking.

I think what you are expressing is, in part, a manifestation of the way society often copes with the differences people with disability present by patronising them.
'They' are less scary, one is less wrong footed, if we see them a sweet and childlike. To do that would be to deny her much. She is a beautiful 18 year old woman. She wants to enjoy that. Your discomfort may arise from the fact that it makes it harder to infantilise her to allow you to empathise with her.

I'm not blaming you. It's how society works at the moment.

[katese11]

I'm not so keen on the fat shaming in that article but hey....Daily Fail

She does look great but the tone is a bit "even people with an extra chromosome can look great if they lose 20kg"

[TestingTestingWonTooFree]

IQ doesn't increase with age though (I don't think).

[letscookbreakfast]

Her pictures have been doing the rounds on Facebook and I personally think that she looks amazing but then I have Cerebral Palsy so I'm all for anyone with a disability breaking down barriers and changing the publics perception.

[loveareadingthanks]

I think it's true that while IQ doesn't change much as you get older there are other factors that effect ability to make decisions. I think the 'mental age thing is very unhelpful, for example, my son was tested as part of dyslexia tests and came out very high IQ and we always knew he was very smart, so as a 9 year old his IQ was a lot higher than average and he was visibly smarter than a lot of average adults by then, but he was a 9 year old with the knowledge, experience, emotional development,, wisdom and judgement of a 9 year old. So not much then. Works the other way too. We do't keep on getting more intelligent as we get older, test us at 18 and 85 years old and IQ won't really have changed but the person has - I doubt many of us think an 18 year old has the same wisdom etc as someone in their 80s.

So although her IQ may be at an average 9 year old level (or not, we don't know) she has 10 years more development in other ways, and 10 years more life experience and wisdom etc so it's not right to compare her cognitive ability to a child.

[Aeroflotgirl]

Well millionsmum what do you expect an 18 year to wear on the beach, a Peppa pig or Dora the explora swimming costume . Yes she may have a low cognitive age, but does not make her a child! She is still 18, and wants what her peers have got. That bikini looks lovely, why should she not wear a bikini. shock horror, even people with DS have relationships!

[Aeroflotgirl]

Where woukd you draw the line million, what if she is 30 and still with the same cognitive function of a 9 year old, would you still say that it's inappropriate for her to wear a bikini like other adults her age! It's about breaking down the barriers, people with disabi,itis want what other adults want.

[5madthings]

I think she looks amazing, gorgeous hair and well done to her on her achievements,,cricket, dancing, swimming, modelling etc. She has worked hard and deserves every success.


As for using someone's IQ as a measure of their mental age, that's just riddiculous.

[MidniteScribbler]

I turned on the tv the other night and one of those top model shows were on, and 16 year olds were parading around in swimwear. Why is it ok for them, but not for this girl? I think she looks great - better than I look in swimwear, that's for sure.

[hazeyjane]

It is great to see people with disabilities modelling and appearing in tv shows, and I look forward to the day when it doesn't feel like a 'novelty'.

Downs Syndrome and other conditions are always seen through such a negative filter. From the very moment we find out we are pregnant, there is a fear of disability, and it shouldn't be that way - seeing people with disabilities in the media just being models and actors and presenters etc is hopefully part of 'normalising' something that a lot of people would like to see as 'other' to their lives.

Agree with other posters about the 'mental age' thing. Ds's paeds don't use the term 'mental age' they say it isn't a useful or relevant way to look at a person, whose development is made up of many different areas.

Ds nearly 5) may have very little expressive speech (so would be in a developmental age bracket of 8-20 months in this area), but has a lot more to say than an 8-20 month old, knows his colours, numbers, tells jokes and can write his name - he just needs other ways to communicate.

People can't be boxed up into one neat defining age - a man of 30 may be deemed to have the cognitive abilities of someone a lot younger, but he would still have 30 years of life experience, and have other areas of development that would be at very different stages.

[HighwayDragon]

She's beautiful!

And I want her trousers

[orchid15]

Yabu - she's 18 and looks beautiful! I wish her every success!