Feeling rubbish at failing driving test (again!) at 40

[WaitingForMyRealLife]

Just failed my driving test again after many many many hours of lessons. Feel rubbish. DH thinks I'm being over dramatic but am truly feeling like a huge failure - 40 and not able to drive, how useless is that?

[DonkeysDoRideBroomsticks]

I can't tread water and am a poor swimmer, and evacuate a room rather than deal with a spider. Now that's feeble.

Look at it this way, on that particular day you didn't convince an examiner over 45-60 minutes you're ready to have a full licence. But you're gaining more experience every time you go out behind the wheel. Another test, another day, you will pass.

DH probably hopes to reassure you it's not a big deal but you'd got your hopes up you'd be driving this weekend without L plates.

It's disappointing but don't give up.

[Manymoons14]

Really feel for you- I failed my third attempt yesterday with only 7 minors, and one major for 'lack of confidence'. After two horrible tests I thought I had done it, but nope. I've had so many lessons its not even worth talking about, and my instructor says I'm the best driver he's taught who hasn't passed the bloody thing .

Please don't feel 'over dramatic'- failing a driving test is the utter pits, you just feel so crap so allow yourself to feel that, as I really think you had to feel crap before you can feel ok about trying again. Yesterday I came home and howled on the floor (quite hard to do 25 weeks preg!) but I just needed to wallow for a bit. You're also not alone about feeling like a huge failure- there are no prizes for second place in driving tests however blimmin close you get. You are putting yourself through the test and the learning, despite how hard it is- defo not a failure.

[ApprenticeViper]

I failed mine three times when I was 17/18, then gave up trying. I think I decided that I just wasn't meant to drive.

I started lessons again when I was 27, after getting thoroughly fed up of waiting at bus stops in the rain. Failed twice more, then passed on my sixth attempt. I hadn't told anybody I was taking it, and I had a stinker of a cold so I really didn't expect to pass, so I think that took most of the pressure off. I was so surprised when the examiner told me I'd passed. I think I actually said "Are you kidding me?!" lol

Ignore your DH, other than telling him that a bit more support might be nice. Keep at it. You will get there

[Summerisle1]

Don't think of yourself as any sort of failure. Passing driving tests is hard!

OK, I was lucky enough to pass first time but ds1 (who was a really competent driver who had driven across the US!) took 4 tests to pass and was 31 when he passed. Everyone assumed he'd just sail through the test but he didn't. Not because he was hopeless or a failure but because it is HARD!

Keep going and tell your DH that a bit more support would help!

[LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726]

Six times a charm for me too... each failure to pass my test felt like the end of the world though, so sympathies. Have a little cry and get that test re-booked. You know you're ready otherwise you wouldn't have been put in for it in the first place.

Don't ever give up!

[Nomama]

Climb back on that horse. Just don't tell anyone

I have no happy little story of 7th time being the charm, I too passed forest time. But I booked a week off work and did a week of lessons, sat in the driver's seat for the first time 10 am on Monday morning, passed my test at 2pm on Friday. It was the most knackering week I have ever had. I would fall soundly asleep the second I got home and was in trouble waking up in time for the next morning.

DH called it a Crash Course

Might that be an option? Just go on holiday (or hide at home for the week) and come back fully qualified?

[whatadrain]

I passed on attempt 9! My problem was nerves. Eventually I went to the doctor and he prescribed me a beta blocker just for my driving test! Worked a treat. I know it's awful to fail, but you will get there!

[WeAllHaveWings]

Still remember the disappointment of failing my test 25 years ago! I passed 3rd time, but tests were much much easier (and cheaper!) back in olden times.

Keep going, you'll get there in the end, I honestly believe for a lot of people its just luck on the day of what instructor you get, weather, route etc etc.

[ithoughtofitfirst]

You'll get there!

Driving tests are a mysterious bastard. I think they're just luck on the day.

Fwiw I wore a really short skirt for mine and passed. Hth.