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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think we need a Dadsnet?

114 replies

mumtoateen · 29/07/2014 08:56

So dads cannot be single parents? There's a nansnet and mums net but no Dadsnet. Yes there's a single topic for it, but surely dads should be able to have their own site?

OP posts:

TakemedowntoPotatoCity · 29/07/2014 10:04

Maybe Bifaux but as pp's have mentioned it tends to be geared towards st specific e.g. hobbies.

Sherborne · 29/07/2014 10:09

As a guy, I don't think I need a Dadsnet. There are enough threads on here that I feel can contribute to, when I feel like I have something positive to add to the discussion.

Many of the topics are not deliberately gender specific, but do benefit from the knowledge of those with experience - For instance, I regularly lurk in the Good Housekeeping threads - I imagine that would be a pretty dusty place on a "Dadsnet"

I'm not put off by the mumsnet brand, if anything, it makes everything feel a bit more woolly and welcoming as long as I steer clear of AIBU

shakethetree · 29/07/2014 10:12

I always imagine the men on here to be a bit like Mr Swainey from one foot in the grave.

firesidechat · 29/07/2014 10:16

I think the very fact that the dadsnet and gransnet forums on here are so underused, says that most posters, be they men, women or oldies, see themselves as just posters. They don't need a separate space and are happy to muck in with everyone else.

I believe that there are a fair few men like Sherborne on here and mumsnet is the richer for it.

Ohwhatfuckeryisthis · 29/07/2014 10:22

If men needed/wanted another dadsnet then wouldn't they have set one up already? I mean it's not like there are no men who don't know how the internet works is it?

DiaDuit · 29/07/2014 10:25

There are plenty of male oriented parenting sites.

Were you not aware that the internet exists beyond mumsnet?

firesidechat · 29/07/2014 10:26

Apparently there is a dadsnet Ohwhat. It's very "stark".

themightyfandango · 29/07/2014 10:33

I regularly post on an interest forum that is at least 80% male posters. The general talk section is thriving and those men regularly post about their lives, issues, problems, gossip etc...much in the same vein as mumsnet. The responses are often wildly different to what is posted here. I often read responses with my mumsnet head on and imagine some of pant hoiking that the opinions there would induce.

I can't imagine many of the posters there seeking out somewhere like mumsnet to discuss personal issues although I often think they would get much better advice if they did.

DiaDuit · 29/07/2014 10:33

Personally I think mumsnet should transition to a non gender specific title

Personally i think mumsnet should carry on doing what has made it so successful and that anyone who wants a nom gendered parenting site should stop gurning and go set one up themselves. MN is not responsible for what anyone else does on the internet. You are free to set up a parenting site for giraffes if it pleases you.

BaileyWhite · 29/07/2014 10:39

Funnily enough I rarely discuss the kids or parenting on this site. It's kind of the last thing I would think to use it for.

mommy2ash · 29/07/2014 10:42

why can't they just post here and I don't think a dad has to be a single parent to use a parenting forum.

CoteDAzur · 29/07/2014 10:43

YABU. We don't need a DadsNet. You might need one. If so, set it up.

The rest of is would like MN to remain a place where we can discuss menstruation, childbirth, domestic violence, vaginal thrush etc.

HotPinkWeaselWearingLederhosen · 29/07/2014 10:45

If a Dadsnet is posted do all the male posters have to leave here?

What about the non Dads?

TheGoop · 29/07/2014 10:50

"Is this was a site mainly for males women would hit the roof."

ha ha ha

there are lots of sites 'just for males' or aimed at males. No one is hitting the roof. Most people don't give a shit. The rest of the Internet is over there >>>>

WatchingSeaMonkeys · 29/07/2014 11:17

I don't think there's as much need for it as Dads tend to talk to other Dads/Men if they have a problem/question.

I remember when our kids were babies that my OH would often get quite down because our kids appeared to be the only ones that weren't "perfect". It was easy to cheer her up a bit because I knew they were exactly the same as ours from talking to their dads.

All the mums seemed to believe that they daren't admit to each other that things were tough & not going right whereas the Dads had no qualms about it & we'd have some quite in depth moans/discussions about our kids/babies/wives....

We were in a very closed environment (Forces) but when I read some of the posts in AIBU it's pretty obvious that a lot of women don't discuss issues "in person" and prefer to do it anonymously.

I'm trying not to generalise too much and am not talking about "all" of either sex by any means...

gertiegusset · 29/07/2014 12:14

I'm a Granny, does this mean I have to bog off to Gransnet now?

firesidechat · 29/07/2014 12:26

Well I'm a granny and I'm staying right here.

In my head I think of this as peoplesnet and pretty much ignore it's actual name. I'm sure I'm not the only one.

sezamcgregor · 29/07/2014 12:35

If you want a forum for single dads, try having a look over on www.gingerbread.org.uk - they have a whole section for single dads over there.

ifyourehoppyandyouknowit · 29/07/2014 12:41

So men feel a bit sidelined and thing that the job of providing somewhere for them to talk should fall to women? Because looking after men is clearly women's work.

And there are loads of men and grandparents and various other types of non-mums who post on here.

CaptChaos · 29/07/2014 12:43

You do like starting odd AIBU's don't you?

There is a Dadsnet. If men don't like DN and don't want to post on MN, then they are more than capable of setting up their own site. It's not sexist to say that, it IS sexist to suggest that we all should be running about doing it for men. It suggests that the women on MN are there to do the bidding of disenchanted men, and it infantilises those men, by suggesting they are so helpless that they can't do it themselves.

HTH

WatchingSeaMonkeys · 29/07/2014 13:08

It suggests that the women on MN are there to do the bidding of disenchanted men, and it infantilises those men, by suggesting they are so helpless that they can't do it themselves.

Agree, if there's a call for it then there'll already be a forum for it! Just because it's not called "Dadsnet" doesn't mean it's not already there.....

CuttedUpPear · 29/07/2014 13:15

Ah I see OP.
I've commented on two of your threads today without realising it was the same poster.

You are being deliberately provocative.

MollyHooper · 29/07/2014 13:31

I think you are a bit mixed up OP.

DH and his penis post on MN all the time. It would be sexist if he wasn't allowed to post because of the penis bit.

BadLad · 29/07/2014 13:41

DH and his penis post on MN all the time

Let me have a try.

bn vmxnv bnbmc nbmc

I hope his is more coherent than my effort. And, shame of shame, all from the bottom row, and three hitting the space bar.

Morloth · 29/07/2014 13:43

You do know Molly that I am now imagining your DH typing with his penis

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