To think compulsive over eating is a mental health illness *warning may be sensitive*

[OhFFSWhatsWrongNow]

"All you have to do to lose weight is to eat healthier and exercise more"

Oh really? I had no idea. So all the over eating I have been doing for the last 22 years to comfort me through a very rough childhood can be cured just like that? Wow, thanks, that's very helpful, all my problems are solved then.

No! I'm sorry but this is an extremely ignorant view. Would you say to an anorexic "just eat more food. You'll be fine in no time"? I sincerely hope you wouldn't. So why would you challenge an over eater as to why they don't eat less food?

Don't get me wrong, I understand people must take responsibility for themselves. I'm not denying that. But for people who have had traumatic upbringings or events in their lives and turn to food for comfort, it can feel like they have lost all control over their eating. This is how I feel, and yes, I need help. It's not so easy to ask for it. Being obese is shameful enough without going to someone and admitting it. From the outside looking in, it doesn't seen so bad. But when you're the one asking, it can seem truly daunting, so many people just don't ask for it.

I want to talk about a taboo subject here, and debunk a myth that states all fat people are just lazy slobs who have no self control and just like to eat all day. This is not only judgemental and a disgusting way to think, it's also completely ridiculous. Many larger people have active lives, many of us take part in sports and have normal active lives. Just because we are over weight doesn't mean we lie around all day stuffing our faces. I have 6 children, do you think I have time to sit my arse on my couch all day? And no, my children are not overweight, for those wondering.

The self control issue, however may be correct. Because when you eat until you are so very unhealthy, you have lost control haven't you? If I could just stop over eating I would. Why the hell would I (or anyone) eat so much that they got dangerously overweight on purpose? I don't enjoy it, and don't know many people who do. I'm not saying it's an excuse to be fat, or makes it ok.

I guess the point I'm trying to make is that compulsive over eaters have a problem, just like people who starve themselves, or people who have depression(which I also have) and deserve help, sympathy and respect, and not ridicule and being made fun of.

So to all my school bullies, and those "friends" and family members and even judgemental people who think obese people are too lazy to do anything about their weight, trust me, you are just making a mental health problem worse. Unless you have struggled with this problem you will never understand.

[Sleepwhenidie]

Absolutely Just - so the answer to the OP has to be 'YANBU, but there can be exceptions and it depends on the level/definition of 'over-eating' ?

[fuzzpig]

Only just read this but wanted to say I was nodding fervently when reading the Caitlin Moran quote, about overeating being an alternative to more obviously dangerous addictions. I am generally very sensible, I have never even tried smoking let alone recreational drugs, I have a little alcohol only a few times a year. Eating is my vice. I comfort eat.

I don't have BED or COE though, I have numerous mental health issues and a history of abuse but the addiction I had in the past was self harming (I was hospitalised in my teens because of it, and my arms are covered in scars).

For me the eating badly is due to low self worth - I wouldn't bother to make good choices and nourish myself because what was the point? I'd still hate myself anyway. I'm only now learning to enjoy looking after myself, at the age of 27, and my food choices are starting to reflect that. The Eat Better threads are really helpful, I am finally able to treat myself with compassion and talk openly about my eating. Sleepwhenidie is fab :o

I think it's just luck that my MH issues didn't manifest themselves in a serious eating disorder (although bad luck that my scars will be there forever). I guess whatever made me cut myself, in someone else would make them get hooked on drugs or alcohol, or in someone else would trigger risky behaviour and gambling, or in someone else would make them binge on thousands of calories at a time.