I have an 8 week old and MIL is obsessed with saying that he either looks like DP or DP's sister. It does my head in and I don't know why. She keeps texting DP this evening sending him photos of his sister when she was a baby saying 'DP look how much your DS looks like your sister'. Whenever we go round she brings it up and I say 'oh my mum thinks he's looking a bit more like me now' and she says 'oh no he's the spitting image of SIL'. Arghhhh. When we go round she gets baby photos out and is like 'Aww look the expression he's making is just like the one SIL used to make when she was a baby' when he really looks nothing like her. I constantly feel like her and SIL are trying to edge me out - first night we brought him home from hospital they descended on us and left me sidelined while they took photos with him.
It's really grating on me tonight! AIBU to feel pissed off? I don't really know why it annoys me so much, it just does!
AIBU?
I know I probably am...
Slh122 · 22/03/2014 18:34
My in laws do this. It doesn't help that they have very distinctive eyes (very very light blue and startlingly beautiful). But I also have blue eyes. DD has inherited the DH eyes. Although in every other way she looks like me! But they still go on and on about how she looks like DH or SIL as if I'm merely the incubator. She also has very slow growing hair like I did at her age (my mum used to sticky tape bows to my head) but noooo they completely ignored that comment and said it was like SIL's and would get thicker when it came through. She's 3 next month and still has very fine fair whispy hair... Like (surprise surprise) her MOTHER! 
I totally understand OP. You do SO much to bring them into this world. You just want a bit of credit that you gave them something good from your genes and then stupid in laws disregard you played a vital role in their existence! Bah!
My DD was the splitting image of her dad and didn't look anything like me at birth. After a couple of months, she looks nothing like him, and looks like me now. So don't worry 
My MIL did this even though DS looked the double of me as a baby and absolutely nothing like DH (for which I had a few comments from people 
). She was constantly saying "oh his eyes are definitely getting darker", "his hair is definitely getting darker, I think it's going to go curly" in a desperate attempt for him to look something like her DS. At 18 months he still has bright blue eyes, and the straightest blonde hair you have ever seen!
Was quite funny when we showed her a pic of me as a baby and she mistook it for DS, she couldn't argue with the resemblance then 
holiday! My baby does not look like a potato head! Fact.
Dd is the spit of ds and he is the spit of his dad. I can't see me in either of my children so doesn't worry me when people comment on how much alike they are/their dad. But then no one says it spitefully. If they did they would prob piss me off so I think yanbu.
My MIL used to tell me how much my daughter looked liked her own daughter. Harped on and on about the fact. Then one day I sent them a photo of wee one pushing a pram and she gushed all over the latest granddaughter picture and commented on how daughter was still the spitting image of Aunty X.
I took great delight in telling her the photo was actually of me at the same age daughter now was. Never again did I hear so much as a whisper about who she looked like 
Hello,
I must be VU too!! My dd is now three and people tell me still she is nothing like me and all my DH blah blah blah.
Does sound like your mil is harping on quite a lot (that maybe your hormones).
Apparently they are meant to look like their dads anyway when they're born so they aren't rejected (so I've heard, it might have been from one of those Robert Winston programmes).
So maybe say, enjoy it for now, baby will change (sinister face)
Anyway, congratulations.
Yes! Totally agree with Terror!
It is like saying "he looks like us, he's ours!"
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I guess it is to be expected- babies don't really look like grownups, they look like those adults did as a baby, and your mil didn't see you as a baby, only her own children.
my mil does the same. Both dh and i were blonde children, but now have dark hair. I seem to give birth to babies with a full head of dark hair that then gets lighter, until my toddler now has a mass of white blonde locks.
when dd2 was born mil forgot all of this and went on about dd2 having dark hair. When i said it was already lightening and i expected she would go blonde like her sister, she said she hoped not for my sake as it would be nice for one of them to take after me! i had to remind her that i had blonde hair as a child too, as it appears she only thinks they look like dh as she obviously never saw me as a child thank goodness
when dd1 was small she kept bringing over dh's baby photos. Now she is carrying around little photos of herself saying that my little blonde bombshell looks like her as a baby let's hope not for her sake) actually the only likeness i can see is that all toddlers have heads proportionally too big for their bodies.
YANBU DS is the image of DH apart from
he his eyes are like mine - his left one is even a tiny bit bigger than his right like me. But Will MIL acknowledge it? No. She can only see DH. DS is really fair and DH and myself are both dark haired so he obviously gets his coloring from BIL even tho DB is really fair too!
I'm sure they mean no harm and it gets less annoying after a while but it is insensitive and it's one of those things that really grates when you're already tired and emotional. I would just try to ignore though, use it as an excuse to catch up on sleep when they visit as 'you know they won'tt mind'
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