birthday cakes at birthday parties

[geriatricmom]

am I BU to think that if you have a birthday party and everyone sings happy birthday around the cake for the child to blow out the candles , the cake is then shared out or wrapped up and put in party bags.
I have been to three childrens parties this year when the cake was then taken home intact for home consumption only, the guests received cupcakes or a slice of generic cake to take home, my dd age 5 was looking forward to a piece of the special cake and was a bit disappointed with a cupcake, although she didnt notice the generic cake was not the party cake on the other times. now not complaining because the parties were lovely and the parents had put a lot of effort into them, I was just wondering why bother with a birthday cake if its not to share. the birthdays were either on the birth day or the birthday had been on a weekday before the party, so they were not saving to have on the day coming up (in which case I totally understand) it seems to be the norm now to show a lovely cake but not cut it for your guests, is this the done thing now?

[have4goneinsane]

where we are the cake is cut up and eaten actually at the party - I'd forgotten all about the English thing of sticking paper napkin to cakes and then squishing them in party bags whence they eventually end up in the bin

much more fun and you send the children home ready sugared-up! Although my ASD DD1 does have a habit of wanting a particular piece and then prostrating herself on the floor and howling and kicking if she doesn't get it!

[crazycanuck]

Holy frak, I've heard it all now. What a load of nothing to worry about. I fully agree with itiswhatitiswhatitis

[Madamecastafiore]

Good god, this would be my idea if a dream. Cake without the addition of spittle. I shudder at small children huffing and puffing their mucus all over birthday cakes!

[ZingSweetCoconut]

in Hungary you eat the cake there and then. done

I don't get the whole "cake in party bag" or "replacement cupcake" or any other crap that goes down

[GertTheFlirt]

If there was ever a reason to be outraged it's got to be "the wrong bit of party cake" rolls eyes

[Hotbot]

Hmm too much thought into this . I baked a real cake and did posh cupcakes for ds party. They were amazing and power ranger themed. Can't believe in the petty remark tbh. I am crap at cake cutting and cupcakes a re easier. Tbh I would much rather be enjoying the party with the kids a than stressing about cutting and wrapping cake.

[Partridge]

Sorry if this has already been said, but my "fancy cake" which is usually heavily themed is disgusting.

It usually has icing that is extremely thick and well handled to manipulate it into a particular shape and I have often hacked away at the sponge and stuck it together with jam to make the base a particular shape too.

I am totally going to make/buy a nice cake for party bags and bin the "themed" cake after the candles have been blown (and the cake has been gobbed on by 20 kids). Great idea and the parent who inevitably nicks the cake from the party bag will thank me.

[Sparklingbrook]

Good god, this would be my idea if a dream. Cake without the addition of spittle. I shudder at small children huffing and puffing their mucus all over birthday cakes!

Exactly Madame,

[BrianTheMole]

I put pre cut cake or cupcakes in the party bags. I haven't got time to be cutting a cake up in to 30 plus bits at a party. Less stress. Surprised its even an issue. Its just cake.

[Iggi101]

I don't like this approach. It does seem very "showy" - here is our fancy cake but you don't get any.
Mind you I don't approve of it in the party bags either! You blow out the candles, you cut the cake, and everyone who wants one gets a bit. That is the ancient way of cake and one which we will be preserving in my family!

[BrianTheMole]

Funny what people read into it isn't it. That the fancy cake is being held back from them. . My cake was exactly the same quality, both shop bought, nothing to fight over.

[Sparklingbrook]

I never took a bit of notice of the cake, I just assumed everyone went to Asda and bought one.

I must have missed some showy masterpieces.

I certainly never made one.

[Blu]

We just cut it up at the table after the candles and share it out to eat there and then. No messing with wrapping it up for party bags!

Then the other parents can't judge my cake making skills when the party bag gets home

[GoodnessIsThatTheTime]

They're mainly home made around here. And often very good! There's an industry of people who make to order and sell too!

[Sparklingbrook]

I don't see the point of making a masterpiece when Asda sell cakes for £8.

[DamnBamboo]

I have done this.
When there are 40 kids at a party, it is much easier to have a pre-cut cake or cupcakes ready to go.
If the kids get some cake, who really cares.

YABU.

[ZenGardener]

It's an interesting idea. I never thought about it before.

I think the OP was just asking. I don't understand where the accusations of her being outraged or complaining about it being a first world problem have come from.

[Nocomet]

I've have a DF who does this as all sorts of relatives come to tea, some after helping with the party.

Fair enough except, chunks of tray bake are too obviously not the cake with the candles even to a 6 year old.

They may well just give the cake to DH, but they want their gift to dad to be "birthday cake", such things matter when you are 6.

A small cake surrounded by lots of well decorated, in the same theme, cupcakes is absolutly fine.

DCs will understand the cake won't do everyone and have been displayed and sung over, the buns become birthday cake, in a way generic cake hiden in the kitchen clearly doesn't.

[Aeroflotgirl]

It's very odd and rude. If you want to keep the special cake for family don't bring it to the party, have a cheaper cake for tge kiddies party, which you sing round and dish out. It's not about the cake but the principle, yes kids do notice. What's the point in singing round the special birthday cake if no child gets any!

[PeaceEagle]

Last party we had for ds there were only cupcakes on a stand, which the children ate there and then. No big cake at all and none to take home. I can only imagine what you must think of me.

Not a single six year old was bothered, btw. We did the singing and candles - I thought that was the important bit?

[Fillybuster]

I make pretty large cakes and always cut them up and send them home. But I'm fairly certain lots of it gets chucked away by parents post-party, or just sits somewhere getting stale and I find cutting up and wrapping 30 slices in hurry quite hard work (plus I miss the end of the party....).

So (contra the OP - sorry!) I really like the idea of pre-cut flat cake or similarly decorated cup cakes to send home. But I do need to figure out how I make complicated cakes in smaller sizes....

[itiswhatitiswhatitis]

Ooh filly I made the same dinosaur cake for ds's party (and gave none to small children mwah ha ha ha)

[Fillybuster]

I don't mind giving cake to small children - I make 4 x quantities of Nigella's Old Fashioned Chocolate Cake recipe for most of these, and there's a limit to how much of that even I can eat (I think ) but I would love to make something smaller (which maybe doesn't take 6 hours to ice...) and get rid of the faff-factor involved with rapidly cutting and packing 35-40 slices in the last 30 mins of each party....

[ThornOfCamorr]

I really think it's up to the people having the party who eats the cake! Children have so much now,party bags,fab prizes and exciting activity parties. Expectation has gone through the roof.When I was little eating the cake really was a massive deal- having a bit of cake was a rare treat! You went to your friends house for the party,played a couple of party games (and not everyone got a prize!) had a few sandwiches,crisps and sausage rolls then sung Happy Birthday ate a piece of cake and went home- without a party bag. imagine if I did that now I appreciate the cake is still very very important to children but they do have many treats.Lots of people splash out on a great party for their child's friends and like to keep the special cake to share with family. I don't see a problem with that at all.

[ebwy]

when I was a kid, the cake was cut up and eaten at the party with pieces being wrapped up to be given to absent friends.


but then, it was the 70's and early 80's, and we didn't do party bags etc either, and were limited to about 6 or 7 kids around our dining table so numbers were naturally limited