Wondering about correct protocol

[Janet365]

Hello there! So I've just started a new job and I'm a bit clueless about what's acceptable and what's not in the kind of situation I'm in.

I'm being sent for about 4 days to an office in a different city just to get a better feel of the role, and my employers have boooked accommodation for me. This is obviously great, but there is a wee problem that I'm facing. I have my older sister visiting me from abroad at the moment. She's my only family and is more like a mother to me. That week will be her last few days in the country and I really don't see the point of us being apart. If she comes with me we can at least spend the some of that time together. I'd book her in a different hotel, but the closest one is quite a distance away and is also very, very expensive.

So is it unacceptable for me to have her stay with me in the same room as the one the company have booked for me? The hotel obviously has no issues with it because the room is suitable for two people, but do I need to seek permission from my employers since they are paying for it?

And will I come across as strange and needy if I ask them about this?? I wouldn't want to send out the wrong impression so soon into my job.

[MadIsTheNewNormal]

As long as you are very careful to make sure that you do not bill your employer for anything she had, extra bed if needed, drinks, breakfast etc., then I don't see why it should be an issue, but if you are new and unsure then I think it would be a good idea to run it by your immediate superior first, as a matter of courtesy.

[ZillionChocolate]

Is there any way you can ask a more established colleague how these things tend to work?

[ArsePaste]

Your sister will be your sister for the rest of your life, but you'll never get a second chance to make a good first impression on your first business trip with your company. Turning up with your sister is ... unlikely to make that impression a good one, even if you do have permission.

[whois]

It's will probably be fine, but I would mention it to your manager.

I used to work away a lot and sometimes my boyfriend stayed with me, it was reeasonably common and acceptable as long as they don't cost anything.

One thing tho, you might be expected to do stuff with work people in the evenings, do you might not see your sister that much anyway.

[BorderBinLiner]

Bad timing with the new job and your sister's visit but I think your going to just have to accept it and put work first.

DH & I will accompany each other occasionally to conferences but only those that we've sussed out before and know that because it's an interesting place there will be a lot of other spouses.

I was in TV, it would not acceptable to bring any one to a hotel if you were researching or filming. As a minimum you would have breakfast, lunch and dinner with your colleagues and depending on the team and the length of the project - think months, go to the cinema/bowling/clubbing/skinny dippiing/get hammered.

You will be fine, go by yourself, work hard and be sociable (but not over the top) with your work mates.

[Joysmum]

I'd ask your employer making it clear that if ok, you'd of course ensure this doesn't affect the costs of you staying and you'll get a separate invoice and receipt from the hotel for her extras so it doesn't go on your expenses.

[kungfupannda]

I wouldn't do this. I think it will create a bad impression. These sort of events tend to involve everyone socialising together in the evenings. If you choose to spend time with someone else, rather than with your colleagues, then you are going to look stand-offish at best, and unprofessional at worst.

And if you do socialise, but with your sister sitting in the room on her own, your colleagues may feel awkward about it and feel that they have to invite her to join you.

It's bad timing, but I don't think it would be at all appropriate to take your sister along.