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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Saying "ta" instead of "thank you"

192 replies

saffstel · 29/01/2014 17:59

Dd2 (10 months) is staring nursery in a couple of weeks. We did an intro hour yesterday.

Her key worker (who was also dd1's key worker) says 'ta' to the children when she hands them toys, food, etc.

This is a pet hate of mine and it annoyed me when she did it with DD1.

Wibu of me to ask her to say "thank you" instead of "ta"? The discussion sounds really petty when I have it in my head, but I really, really hate "ta".

OP posts:
PrimalLass · 29/01/2014 19:10

Oh I see, south of England 'tar'? This is all getting too confusing.

PrimalLass · 29/01/2014 19:11

In Scotland it is ta as in ta(p).

SwedishEdith · 29/01/2014 19:11

Ha ha @ the shock at people using it at work. I use "cheers" and "ta" at work - sometimes in the same sentence - especially when someone makes me a brew Wink

shushpenfold · 29/01/2014 19:12

Totally with you here - I refused to use it when mine were little although lots did. I don't say 'ta' I say thank you so why on earth I'd teach my children to say anything different is beyond me. Say something (although she'll think you're bonkers!!)

hoppingmad · 29/01/2014 19:12

I don't like ta - or hiya which is my other pet hate. It's nothing to do with misplaced snobbery, they are just irritating words.
I've never said them to any of mine and they've always managed, however I wouldn't bring it up with nursery - don't make yourself seem like 'one of those parents' just yet!

IRCL · 29/01/2014 19:14

YABU, it is just a word.

Is it because it's easier for the child to say Ta then Thank you?

I don't know but in the grand scheme of things it is such a non issue.

shushpenfold · 29/01/2014 19:15

....unless it's an issue for the OP, in which case it isn't.

YouStayClassySanDiego · 29/01/2014 19:15

Who is actually clutching those fucking pearls, as some of you have suggested?

Ta is a word some people dislike, we all have words we hate [plenty of threads about them] and anyone jumping on 'you're just being a snob' bandwagon is a prat.

BlueSkyandRain · 29/01/2014 19:15

The urban dictionary says " Ta: A slang word for Thanks. The word is a result of the heavy Danish influence on the English language. Most people do not realize that the English language roots are really Danish or Jutland. Equiped with this knowledge this word is easy to decipher.

The Danish word for Thanks is tak. In Scotland and upper England it was common to drop the k at the end because of the way words were pronounced during the time of old English and Middle English. Hence the slang word "Ta" which should actually be pronounced "TA-k" but over time became "Ta" is really Tak meaning "Thanks" ".

I guess that's why it's considered normal for adults up north, and southerners get it wrong again (along with not knowing what a breadcake is etc ;) ).

Shelbury · 29/01/2014 19:15

It was described as rage worthy and offensive up thread

Agree it's misplaced snobbery though

SwedishEdith · 29/01/2014 19:16

I'm northern and pronounce it "tar". Never heard it said as "ta" so assume that's just a regional variation? I like the idea that I'm speaking Scandi.

RabbitRabbit78 · 29/01/2014 19:17

'Ta' gives me the rage. Kids should be taught to speak properly and the way to do this is by modelling speaking properly. Yes they may say ta to mean thank you but they should understand what they are trying to say.

I also get the rage over baby talk like 'doggy' etc so I may BU. I think it comes from being an ex primary teacher who heard a lot of kids old enough to use the proper words still using baby talk because their parents did. I would pick the nursery up on it because IMO it shows a lack of understanding of modelling correct use of language (although tbh for me I also think it shows a lack of respect for the kids).

matildamatilda · 29/01/2014 19:18

I'm from the US and I live in W. Yorkshire. I think there's a big difference regionally.

I hear "ta" at work a lot and it's clearly just an informal "thank you," like "thanks."

But sometimes I'll hear it down south and it has a different feeling. Like a person saying "cheers ta!" to the cashier after buying a newspaper--it sounds maybe a little condescending?

grumpyoldbat · 29/01/2014 19:19

I thought ta was short for tapadh leat Blush.

saffstel · 29/01/2014 19:20

Didn't mean to start a north/south war! Sorry northern sisters!
For me the issue is not liking baby talk, not class!

OP posts:
Upsy1981 · 29/01/2014 19:20

Ta perfectly acceptable here and yes it is proven rhat to use 'baby talk' helps to develop the bond between adult and child and aid communication. I'm sure some people will be along to say that they never used it with their children and they have a perfectly strong bond with their children but nevertheless that is what research says, although obviously there will be exceptions to any rule.

I honestly didn't realise that toilet or pardon were considered rude until I read it on here a while back. Where I live (NW England), parents from all backgrounds actively encourage their children to say pardon. I'm sure in ye olde days that might have been the case but as language has developed it has become more frequently used.

But this is from a 30-odd year old woman who inadvertently used the word 'innit' the other day, much to the amusement of my DH.

Upsy1981 · 29/01/2014 19:22

Matilda, you should try living where I live where 'cheers, ta, thanks a lot luv'is a perfectly acceptable way to finish a transaction in a shop.

hoppingmad · 29/01/2014 19:23

See I have no problems with pardon, it's better than the grunt or 'huh?' I normally get from the older ones!

FootieOnTheTelly · 29/01/2014 19:24

PrimalLass. I don't think saying tar is unusual! Confused I have said it like that my whole life and allmy family say it like that.

'Ta' sounds Liverpudlian in my head. Tar sounds normal.

Dawndonnaagain · 29/01/2014 19:25

Actually this is fascinating. I have a huge problem with Pardon because it's nearly always used in the wrong context, as in 'what did you say'. I hate pardon unless I'm actually asking for forgiveness for a misdemeanor.
Also hate toilet and serviette and for some unknown reason, the word 'crepuscular'. I shuddered as I typed that! Grin

pancakesfortea · 29/01/2014 19:25

pyjamas I grew up in east London and Essex. I say "Ta(r) love" to my kids all the time.

Good job I don't mind being common.

shushpenfold · 29/01/2014 19:26

....or 'what' (or rather 'whoh') from my 13 and 11 yr olds....9yr hasn't started with that gem as yet.

lunar1 · 29/01/2014 19:31

I can't stand ta, I have no idea why. Im Northern and when I hear it it makes me cringe as much as if someone ran their nails down a chalk board or was chewing cotton wool. I feel the same about the word Kids.

IneedAsockamnesty · 29/01/2014 19:31

I don't think I've ever met a RL person who actually says lavatory

I do but only when I'm talking to people who look like they may faint at shit box

PrimalLass · 29/01/2014 19:31

'Ta' gives me the rage. Kids should be taught to speak properly and the way to do this is by modelling speaking properly.

But it is speaking properly.