To ask your best baby tips?

[BroodyTroody]

A Christmas tips thread has just got me thinking...

What is your one golden nugget of genius advice for a new mum, either something specific I should do, or an invaluable item I should by?

Thank you!

cardie

Ignore most advice unless it looks like it might suit your baby

Seriously - some babies nap well so you can sleep when they sleep, but if they don't then that is the single most annoying advice you can hear. Some babies love being carried in a sling all day, other babies scream at it. Some babies love co-sleeping, other babies hate it. Some babies hate a routine, others hate not knowing what might be coming next.

So what works well for one mum and baby might be terrible for you and your baby, but you just end up stressing out because it sounds like good, well-meaning advice but it just doesn't work

(I speak from having a 1970s-style baby who resisted all the current recommendations such as blw, slings, co-sleeping etc, so most well-meant advice I was given just didn't suit us.)

My personal advice is a really decent waterproof coat and walking shoes!

My tips: most newborns can only stay awake for up to 1 1/2 hours a t a time. If you have tried everything and they are crying its probably tiredness. Cuddle them to sleep and get some rest!

Slings are a parents best friend. I wished I had used them round the house earlier.

Avoid difficult to put on clothes from vertbaudet

Do not feeling guilty and try to run on instinct.

Babies can't read the baby books is my favourite advice ever! They also can't read birth plans

Just slow down. You don't have to do anything else except look after the baby.

Never sit down to feed without a drink of water, the phone and the remote by your side.

If you live somewhere hot and use a buggy, I swear by a shade-a-babe - sunscreeens for buggies. You just pop it over the buggy rather than suncreaming the wriggly screaming infant when you only wanted to pop out for a pint of milk...

relax about everything.
as cute as spending time gurgling at baby whilst changing them when they are small is, get good at speed changing whilst they don't move you'll be thankful when they can.
best buy was over sized muslin squares, great for so many things.

Oh, you will get masses of clothes. As they come in, sort them out. Lots of people buy bigger baby stuff but for the season you're in So DS was born in July and got lots of age 6 months short suits, for example.

Keep them in the wrappers, take them back and get a credit note to use later, or actually a lot of shops will take back un-tampered with stuff a few months down the line.

Do what suits you as a family and not what you feel you 'ought' to be doing.

If it works for you to have a strict GF routine, controlled crying etc - then do it, and ignore the comments on Mumsnet this is what I did .

Equally if you are happy with a laid back, do as you like, routine-free lifestyle then do that.

Do not worry what anyone else says or does. .

Best buy - big piles of muslin cloths!

A friend told me to get them and I had no idea why or what the hell for before I had the baby, but they are fantastic :)

Totally agree with Thurlow, ignore advice that doesn't suit your baby. (As the mother of a sleep-fighting velcro newborn, by one week in I was sorely tempted to throttle each 'helpful' person who suggested I should sleep when the baby sleeps.)

But as a general tip, prepare as much as you can in order to make life easy those early weeks. Cook food for the freezer, stock up on toilet roll and toothpaste, clean the house from top to bottom. And then when baby arrives you can sit on the sofa for six weeks solid...

The outer leaves of a Savoy cabbage in your bra if your boobs get sore. I have no idea why this works but it was an absolute god send when I was engorged

Oh and best buy... right now it's a baby snot sucking thingymibob and a bottle of saline drops. You never know when that first cold will hit, and your baby starts screaming that they can't feed because their nose is too blocked up to breathe.

CailinDana bloody hell I never knew that about the vests, my kids are now 23, 20 and 5 they all had them!!!

Accept all offers of help, don't be a martyr like I was. Friends would offer to bring meals round for us and I'd say 'oh no don't worry it's fine'. Craziness! I'm pregnant with DC2 and this time I'm determined to say yes to all offers (except they probably won't offer as I said no last time!).

Don't worry if you don't really enjoy the first weeks. It's a great time, but also really tough. It gets loads better and easier.

Agree with chocolate!
I had exactly the same same situation and have only just ploughed through the 6weeks worth of housework! Very therapeutic, very dusty house!
Have spent all my time cuddling dd and keeping us fed.

Not so much babies as small children:

1. Quit while you're ahead. As in: leave the playground before they are too tired to accept that you have to go home. Leave the party just before they start the spiral of hysteria that ends in tears.

1. Never, ever make a threat you aren't prepared to carry out. It doesn't have to be a dire threat, but it must be done if they call your bluff.

1. Decide what you find really important and then be really, really persistent about it. Eg: shoes off and put away at the door, or pleases and thank yous. You have to be relentless about it, and eventually it will stick.

It was worth reading this thread for Cailins vest advice alone. Dc2 is 8 months now, how could I not know this?

Something else I wish I had known at the time - you might not be overwhelmed with love the minute your baby is born, everyone always tells you 'it's the best thing that will ever happen' - but for many women it is not. You might be tired, sore, in a lot of pain, struggling with breast feeding, feeling emotionally overwhelmed etc etc and that is quite normal. When I got back from hospital I actually didn't want to sit on the sofa with my baby all the time, I wanted to do 'normal' things that reminded me I was a person, not just a mother. I remember our first night home and DH kindly urging me to sit down and rest when all I wanted to do was get in the kitchen and cook myself a decent meal after a week of hospital food. and not eat my DH's cooking.

Save up for a jumparoo. Life saver.

^^ Ragwort that should be laminated and put in every midwife's waiting room my dear. Excellent advice

Don't dress the baby in clothes.
Baby grows till they are 9-10 months old.

1. they wash great
2. they dry great
3. don't need ironing
4. comfortable for growing limbs
5. easy to get on & off
6. they are very cheap.

Do what feels natural to you. If you want to hold your baby all the time do it. Let what feels right guide you. If you don't want to pass your baby around to other people to hold then don't.

Also, accept all offers of help. If someone offers to shop or cook for you, accept it.

You and your baby are the most important thing (existing sibling excepted).

A drop of breast milk cures sticky eyes!! Just give em a squirt!

Running tap = instantly soothed baby (for me)

Don't start something you can't carry on. Like rocking babes to sleep or taking them for a drive to nod off.
Also, make sure as they get older you put together any Xmas toys a few days earlier! I remember my hubby spending hours on Xmas eve making a wooden dolls house

Love this thread!

Earplugs
White noise app
Basket in lounge and bedroom with nappies etc

I don't sleep when the baby sleeps as my baby only sleeps for 45 mins max in the day and I feel worse getting woken up,than ifi hadn't bothered....