To be surprised to have a male health visitor?

[PeriodFeatures]

Just that really! I wondered what other people think?

[ReallyTired]

"ReallyTired, you don't think a woman should be allowed to refuse a male health visitor?"

Do you think that someone should be allowed to refuse a woman doctor or a black doctor? What about someone who thinks that homosexuals should not be employed? Should mindless prejudices against either sex be tolerated in the 21st century? At my GP's surgery you are not allowed to request a woman doctor unless its a gynological issue.

A health visitor does not do imimate examinations and breastfeeding support is a tiny part of the job.

[Floggingmolly]

That sounds bad, Coconut? Would you seriously tar all male medical professionals with the same brush?

[ReallyTired]

CoconutRing

I hope you reported your male collegues. I think its very sad that you think that all men cannot be trusted. It is naivety to think that female health professionals are not capable of abuse.

All the male health professionals I have met have been fab. This idea that all men are potential rapist is appauling.

[Opalite]

I can assure you they are not 'mindless prejudices'! I'm glad thatt you have no reason to believe a woman may feel uncomfortable or intimidated to let a male health visitor into their home but unfortunately there are endless reasons why this is the reality for many women. At my GP I always request not to be seen by a certain female GP for my own personal reasons, I also request to only be seen by a female GP.

[Yonionekanobe]

I had a male MW. His name was Angel (Spaniard). It was fitting.

No problem at all with a male HV, and tend to agree with Reality - unless there are extenuating circumstances no one should be prevented from doing their job on the basis of sex.

[Opalite]

I agree that nobody should be prevented from doing their job because of their sex. Surely nobody should be forced into something they find uncomfortable/intimidated though?

[TwoAndTwoEqualsChaos]

I had a male mid-wife, who was lovely. I saw him for both ante-natal and post-natal care and, tbh, the most disconcerting thing was that he looked like Carlton out of The Fresh Prince of Bel Air! His hand hygiene was meticulous and I knew he had a wife and child, which, I think, made him more sympathetic. He never had to do anything more intimate than remove my post c-section stitches, though.

[Opalite]

Intimidating

[CoconutRing]

Yes. I do tar ALL male medical professionals with the same brush. It's the only way I know to avoid any abuse or inappropriate examinations such as TUBEing (totally unnecessary breast exam).

[CoconutRing]

I did report them and I was a witness at the subsequent court case.

[mrsjay]

I can see why you would be a bit surprised but I had a Male HV 20 years ago then I moved house and got somebody else he was the best health visitor i had he was great very proactive and dint sit in my house drinking tea like the others i had

[WorrySighWorrySigh]

I had a male MW. I felt more comfortable with him than other MWs I have had. I felt very comfortable talking about how I felt after being sterilised during third DC's birth. He was very empathetic.

IMO it is down to personality, both of the HCP and the parents. I'm much more comfortable talking to men I dont really know well than women.

[ReallyTired]

I think wanting to avoid all men is a pychological problem and needs pychological support. I except that rape victims have particular needs, no one should be able to reufse health care from a man or a woman on a whim.

As WorrySighWorrySigh say it's personality of the person that is important.

[Opalite]

its not about wanting to avoid all men. If I'm walking down a dark alleyway and a man walks towards me I feel very different than if a woman is walking toward me, I don't think I'm alone in thinking that. It isntt the fault of the women but the fault of the way society is at the moment.

[BoffinMum]

Gosh, do people mind about this stuff? It wouldn't have occurred to me that it was an issue.

[MisForMumNotMaid]

I would be happy with a male health visitor at a clinic, a male nurse/ doctor/ midwife at hospital but I don't allow men into my home when I'm on my own.

I wouldn't mind internals etc, I'm not prudeish but I have been put in compromised vulnerable positions in my life and I just wouldn't be comfortable with a male 'insert role here' in my bome unless DH or another person was also present.

[Viviennemary]

It's not unreasonable to be surprised as that's quite unusual. However, at one time there wasn't such a thing as a female bus driver or female tax driver. Now of course there is. I expect the same will happen eventually with Health Visitors. But I could see why people wouldn't be as comfortable discussing things like problems with breast feeding.

[bananananacoconuts]

My male health visitor was beyond amazing. If you live in Hull, he's so fantastic

[TheHouseCleaner]

I've never met a male HV nor have I ever known anyone who has AFAIK. Yes, I'd have been surprised because it's quite unusual, no I wouldn't have been in the least bothered. In fact I'd probably have been very pleased, both to see a bit of breaking of the mould and because I often find that I have more in common with men than women. I can't see why the majority would care provided he was good at his job (religious/cultural differences aside).

[ReallyTired]

MisForMumNotMaid
What the difference between a male health visitor coming to your home andthe plumber coming to fix the tap. Does your husband have the day off if you need the boiler fixed?

[misdee]

I had a male trainee midwife when I was having dd3. he helped deliver her, and he was lovely.

also had a male hv when we moved to this area, apparently a lot of people were sad when he left. he is still spoken highly of, as he was just so easy to talk to, and non-judgmental. I rate him up there with my favourite female HV who helped me through bad PND when ds was tiny.

[MisForMumNotMaid]

reallytired I'm a mechanical engineer so don't often have trades in. But yes, I do have someone in the house with me if someone is visiting I don't know well.

[quoteunquote]

Did he have long hair?

Good for him, I can't see any problem with a male health visitor.

[Mrsdavidcaruso]

Really tired its not mindless prejudice actually.

I remember being shocked when my Aunt told me that in 1971 on a routine gynea visit to her GP she mentioned she had just got married and was told that she now needed her Husbands permission to get the pill.

And here we are 40 odd years later and nothing seems to have changed
We are expected to just put up and shut up and have no control over our own bodies, who we allow to see them, who we allow to touch them, in case its seen as discrimination or hurts someones feelings all in the name of someones idea of equality.

Any man wanting to be a midwife or HV has to deal with the fact that his services are going to be refused by some patients, they need the training to ensure they don't take it as a personal slight but a patients right to privacy and dignity, if they cant understand that then they are in the wrong profession.

Otherwise we may just as well go back to the 70s when women knew their place, didn't make waves and looked on medical professionals as Gods who told us what to do.

I personally am not going back to those days.