school crack down on hair colour

[mrsfuzzy]

new school year and problems already! ds is 14 and like a lot of girls her age experiments with her hair, for the first time during the school hols she tried a semi permanent raspberry colour on her red hair [god knows why- ex p let her do it] anyhow i was cool with that as it doesn't look that obvious, as she washes it it becomes less obvious, however school are cracking down on these things make up, uniform etc as they did last year, but she brought a note home yesterday saying to remove the dye or steps will be taken, i wasn't fazed by this as each wash reduces the colour, but how do people 'get away' with flouting the rules about such things one girl has dyed her hair jet black with blue streaks over the hols and mum told me she is not going to remove the colour for anyone, one lad keeps one side of his head shaved in spite of repeated warnings, mum says she ignores them, i accept the school policy that's not the problem but aibu to wonder why it seems the 'easy targets get picked on' to set an example? any thoughts or similar experiences anyone?

[NoComet]

The only effect this rubbish has here is that my (very conformist DD1) has added it to her growing list of reasons to do A levels at collage.

She's sick to death of being patronised and treated like a baby. Why on earth should you have to ask to take off your jumper, you were allowed to divide you were too hot in reception. It's nuts!

[comingintomyown]

Our school had decided to tweak the uniform which is okish

However they are also on insisting on a black school bag and a black school coat which I think is OTT as what on earth to those things have to do with learning ?

Also surely 1,200 black bags and coats in school - surely a recipe for lost property disaster ?

[IceCreamForCrow]

I agree, and it was still the case years ago when I was at school. I wasn't a rule breaker by any stretch of the imagination but a skirt I wore wasn't quite right (apparantly) and I was hauled over the coals.

My school complicated the whole issue by not having a uniform but school 'colours' which left things massively open to interpretation. Have a uniform or don't but 'colours' is a wishy washy half way something and nothing arrangement.

The more edgy faction were daily getting away with all sorts of uniform contraventions and no-one said much about it. My friend was a punk an although her hair caused great consternation at first the school eventually turned a blind eye. I think they had to or she'd never have been in school.

Dd says it still goes on now though. I think the first few weeks of term the school is strictest but then it all starts to slide.

I do find the way schools preferring trousers for girls ironic. When I was at school they used to kick up merry hell about girls turning up in trousers

[natwebb79]

Erm, those people saying that it isn't fair because teachers can dye their hair, that's because they have already had their years at school where they had to follow the rules and they are now adult trained professionals who have earnt the right to dye their hair, wear makeup and not wear a school uniform any more.

[littlewhitebag]

My DD2 attends a private school and they are very strict about uniform, shoes, hair, nail polish, make up etc. She has just gone into year 11 and the concession they get this year is they can have their hair down in class. Before now it always had to be tied up. The girls look lovely as they are fresh faced, very natural and as they are all dressed identically there is no issues with who has the best clothes etc. They all also have lovely hair as they would not get away with it dyed mad colours.

DD1 attended 6th form in the same school and got away with her hair dyed a dark red colour but i think they would have cracked down on anything too flamboyant.

They are encouraged to channel their creativeness into art/music/drama lessons.

[QuintessentialOldDear]

I have been young. Yes. Never coloured my hair, never saw the point even then! (I guess I was middle aged before my time, lol!)

My sons want orange and blue streaks in their hair. My youngest has curly, messy hair, he would look like a true troll! I just dont understand it.
I hear you say it is fun, and cool. But I dont see it.

[mrsjay]

but surely they should be role models for children and not dye their hair

of course teachers shouldnt stop dying their hair (we need a tongue in cheek emocticon)

[teenagetantrums]

Last year my daughter was sent home for having dyed her hair, i just sent her back to school, it was red could have been natural. I refused to make her dye it again especially as most of her friends had bleached blonde hair and that was ok apparently. There really is not much the school can do about it except exclude her and they didn't want to that so her dyed hair stayed. She had gone off to 6th college today with pink hair am so glad college don't care hair.

[ArbitraryUsername]

I also strongly disagree with nonsensical rules about hair colour etc. Having pink hair does not affect one's ability to learn in any way.

I also don't agree that adults who have finished school have 'earned' their right to have their hair how they want. School is not supposed to be a punishment for, erm, being a child.

[GhostsInSnow]

Have added a pic to my profile of DD's offending hair colour. Now was it fire engine red I could completely understand but to ignore a child with green hair in favour of DD I found outstanding.

The green haired girl does have a parent who would come up to school shouting I add.

[GhostsInSnow]

Just to point out, DD doesn't actually spend her life dressed in wizard robes...that was taken at Harry Potter. She's a big Potter geek with an ambition in life to be a Weasley and have ginger hair

[LadyBigtoes]

"earnt the right to dye their hair" - that's just silly.

Why should school have to be about pointless rules? Kids aren't stupid, if a rule makes sense they can generally respect it, and they do have to deal with LOTS of rules that are there for good reasons - like safety and respecting other people. If it makes no sense, it will make them want to rebel more.

I was such a goody two shoes at school academically - I was very, very good and did very well. BUT stupid, patronising rules like this were exactly what made me leave and take my A-grade potential to a community college. Where there were students of every age and appearance and you could come and go as you pleased, and guess what? I still did well.

This kind of rubbish simply stems IMO from educational professionals who for some reason thing that OBEDIENCE and CONFORMITY are the be-all and end-all and must be enforced or we'll all go to hell in a handbasket. They are old-fashioned and wrong.

[kali110]

Think its ridicuous! Having a different colour hair doesnt stop kids learning. How does it stop lads learning if they dont have short hair? My cousin has shoulder length hair but is going to uni to do law, amazingly his hair didnt stop him....
I dont think dyed hair makes people ugly trolls!i havent had natural hair for 10 years, people have still found me attractive.

[mrsjay]

charlie her hair is lovely and the normal red they all have, nowt wrong with a robe now and then

[ArbitraryUsername]

Charlie: don't bite your tongue. You don't have to shout like a fishwife, but you can (and should) complain about ridiculous and inconsistent uniform policy.

[absentmindeddooooodles]

When I was at school ( left 2006) it was very much the same as alot of you have described re different standards for differnt pupils.
We were not allowed, dyesd hair, nail varnish, piercings,makeup, coats anywhere in the school gates, our ties were maeasures as were our flaires :)

I got into so much trouble for having the wrong shoes or trousers....god forbid they have a buttton rather than a zip?! However youd regularly see the kids from the "bottom set" or the exclusion lot wearing bright blue eye shaddow with tiny vest tops and huge flairs with heels!

I once got called into the heads office as my form tutor had a problem with my dyed hair. I got sent home. My hair was not dyed. It has always been black but they would not believw me at all! My mum had to come in and give tjem a bollocking before tjey believed me.

Im all for a bit of individualitu with hair colour. Although agree with the plastering makeup and nail varnish etc on.

[GhostsInSnow]

mrsjay, thank you. Its subtle. Even in bright sunlight it's still pretty obviously not an unnatural colour.
What annoyed me is she has many health issues which have meant she's only been in school part time for almost 12 months, and when she has she's spent a great deal of time in separate tutoring. Despite all this she's firmly on target for all her GCSE's and ahead of many of the full time kids.
yesterday was her first full day back, a difficult and brave step for her thats taken some doing and the very first thing said to her wasn't 'welcome back' but 'TONE DOWN THAT HAIR!' I found that incredibly sad.

[GhostsInSnow]

Arbitary. DH has told me to keep smiling sweetly for now. Should a letter come home about her hair we will formulate a response and ask for more detailed information about the inconstancies. He is infinitely more patient than me

[mrsjay]

that is sad that they can't see past hair colour,

[Bogeyface]

I think its a lot to do with school image. Now that there is choice (ha!) about schools, they want themselves to be seen as naice with non of those horrid chavvy children with mad hair

There was a bit of kerfuffle when DS was still at school about boys long hair. The school said that boys couldnt have long hair and one parent (he was actually very rich, worked in IT something, v v successful) took the school on. It made it to the national papers and the school had no choice but to back down. Loads of boys started growing their hair after that, more because they could than because they wanted to I suspect :o

I totally agree that it is pointless. Can you imagine someone telling Einstein that he needed to sort his hair out before presenting his theories? Did the Queen say that Bob Geldof would only get knighted if he cut his hair?

[noddyholder]

Hair colour should be so far down the list of things to get grief over Ridiculous.

[ArbitraryUsername]

I think I'd write a (polite) email about it, especially because you DD doesn't need attending school to be more difficult. You don't have to cause a huge stink, but it is worth complaining about.

Smiling sweetly and carrying on just allows the status quo to continue.

[ArbitraryUsername]

IME at school, it was the naice middle class kids with the outlandish hair.

[Crowler]

I don't have a daughter but if I did I wouldn't allow her to dye her hair, and I'd quite like having the school to blame it on.