To think there's something not quite right with my baby

[ButteryJam]

HV, GP and DH all make me feel like I'm an over worrying hypochondriac mother

My LO has been very very fussy right from the very start, very alert and a little bit colicky (but definitely not colic). Now she is 13 weeks and has the following:

• episodes of screaming in pain for up to two hours, and won't settle unless I give her calpol. This occurs in the morning too. But it's all very unpredictable
• excessive (sometimes up to 50) hiccups at least twice a day
• refuses feeding (even if feed time) when in the state of crying
• tends to only feed when either asleep or very sleepy
• naps are so short, sometimes just 10-20 min, and a very very sensitive sleeper (I have to keep the house phone off and literally tiptoe around her)
• has had a sniffly nose, watery eyes almost constantly
• coughing during feeds or after
• and just generally not very happy, though does have some very happy smiley moments too

I'm a first time mum, so please tell me, is this all completely normal? HV told me earlier on in the week to stop looking for what may be wrong but just accept I am very unlucky to have this type of a baby.

(Tongue and lip tie were removed around 10 weeks so its not that).

[meddie]

Theres a few things you can try.
Feed her upright
Try and keep her upright for 20 to 30 mins after a feed (ie in a bouncy chair). put a pillow under the mattress in her bed (Not on top)
Wind her frequently during feeds
Try smaller more frequent feeds

I,m not sure whether they still sell thickeners over the counter anymore. Carobel and Thick and easy are two that spring to mind

[Weissbier]

Difficult to know without seeing her but if your GP's given her a clean bill of health then I would probably agree with the HV. The screaming could be overtiredness, the hiccups -50 doesn't sound worrying to me, I have never counted those of my DDs...I would notice if it had been going on for an hour or something. Runny nose etc - most small children are covered in bodily fluids of one sort or another - could have a sniffle, if GP isn't worried then I wouldn't be either.

Is she bf? Could her formula be bothering her, or even something you're eating? Sometimes stuff like you not eating dairy can help with things like these? Have they done any allergy tests?

[mrslyman]

I was really lucky in that when I took DS to the GP for his cough the GP realised it was silent reflux but I reading around an listening to friends I think a lot of parents are fobbed off and told they have fussy babies.

Can you see a different GP at your practises and go in suggesting silent reflux as they make take you more seriously.

DS was prescribed rinitadine which is the easiest thing for BF babies ad most other meds need to be mixed with formula.

Good luck

[Weissbier]

Crossposted - forgot about silent reflux, good point

[ButteryJam]

Stargirl, yes I am co-sleeping and have tried a sling, but she doesn't always like it. Holding her up in the air calms her too sometimes.

[FixItUpChappie]

What an unhelpful thing for a HV to say

Its your job to question when you are concerned OP - if she's fine, she's fine but you keep on asking whatever questions you want.

I found both of mine particularly fussy around 3-4 months. Do you have a baby carrier or sling? That can really help keep them upright after feeds if it is reflux issues.

Have you tried white noise during naps? A fan in the room or a little white noise machine has worked wonders with both of mine.

Do you have a humidifier? That can help if they are stuffy but be sure to keep the filter clean.

Do you think your catching her early hunger cues?....waiting too long can make a feed very difficult because they are so upset. Watch cues and the clock combined so you know when a feed should be coming up. They eat well when sleepy because they are so relaxed.

Just some random thoughts off the top of my head anyway.

[ButteryJam]

Meddie, thanks for those suggestions, but she refuses to feed upright as she wants to be fed when sleepy (well in all honesty I quickly offer it when she stirs from sleep and she accepts). I can't wake her up because then it may be more crying and pain for her ...

[FixItUpChappie]

sorry cross posted with you OP

[hettienne]

I would see another GP and ask to try gaviscon, just to see if it helps.

It doesn't sound normal to me.

[Cuddlydragon]

OP in terms of going back to your GP, don't be embarrassed. Can you try another in the practice and ask specifically about reflux, 3 GPs and 2 HV kept telling me I was an over anxious mum and that babies cried. In desperation I went to a well baby clinic at another practice and a HV with silent reflux kids herself took one look and sent us straight to our local children's hospital. We were admitted that day for a few days and silent reflux was diagnosed. Treatment hasn't been straightforward but it revolutionised our lives. Weight gain or lack thereof is not a diagnosis tool as some reflux babies feed for comfort and gain weight perfectly well. Also health professionals should treat your concerns as sufficient cause for investigations.

[catsdogsandbabies]

Reflux reflux reflux. Push for referral. Don't take no for answer

[ButteryJam]

Thanks everyone for your support and suggestions!

[mrslyman]

DS didn't have all the symptoms either

[cafecito]

My guess silent reflux, go back to a different GP in the practice. Please try not to give calpol

[ButtercupsAreFlowers]

Sounds like silent reflux to me. Trust your instincts - GPs and HVs can be wrong. I'd insist on a referral to a paediatrician. My baby DD2 had horrible reflux that wasn't diagnosed soon enough, due to general faffing about by primary care professionals. It was only when we saw a gastroenterologist that the problem even began to be solved. Don't be fobbed off!

[VenusRising]

Buttery jam, please stop giving your child carpool. You are drugging her up, and paracetamol can lead to her developing asthma.

You need to rethink what you are doing, you know, until you have a babe yourself you don't realise that all new borns wail and stay awake, no matter what the books say. I remember reading that newborns sleep 18 hours a day, and calculating that my DD was awake for 18 hours a day.

It's so tough if they wail and don't sleep, but that's babies for you! All babies wail and don't sleep, or just catch a few naps here and there- not enough for you to get some restorative sleep mind, so you must enlist help and get someone to mind her while you get six hours of sleep solid, at least.

Also investigate silent reflux, and keep her upright as much as possible, that means holding her, not just giving her calpol and putting her down.

[flatmum]

my ds3 was very similar to this, he had tongue tie and silent reflux and it later turned out he is lactose intolerant and I had to stop bf him earlier. get her seem by a paed who will prob put her on gaviscon and ranatidine if it is silent reflux, which it sounds like to me. this helped quite a bit for us and also at about 6m you will probably notice a huge improvement once she is sitting up and starting to eat solids. hang in there, it will get better.

[TaurielTest]

Another one who thinks it sounds like silent reflux. My first baby had this and it took weeks and weeks and more than 1 patronising HCP saying there was nothing wrong and "babies cry you know" and "was I not coping" - or urging me to stop trying to BF - before a locum referral took us to a paed who actually knew what he was talking about, who watched him feeding for 30 seconds and said "he's obviously got reflux", prescribed ranitidine and - well, it all got sorted out. . I still feel angry (5 years on) about those weeks of my concerns being dismissed and my baby being in pain that could have been dealt with...

Don't be embarrassed to go back to the GP and ask for a referral to a paediatrician if s/he won't take you seriously.

Also I wanted to say that there may well be light at the end of the tunnel, it often (though unfortunately not always) improves quite a lot around 4-5 months with sitting up and pyloric sphincter development.

[flatmum]

and lay off the calpol I'd say too ...

[KristinaM]

I'm not a doctor but I don't think that frequent hiccups, watery eyes and nose and coughing aftre feeds are normal . I think you shoudl go back to your GP and if they are not helpful, ask for a referral.

Also I don't understand why, when a parent gives a specific cogent list of problems they child has, the first reaction of some people is to dismiss their concerns and imply that she must have PND.

[meddie]

I think your just going to have to be assertive with your GP. Its classic reflux symptoms. Granted a lot of babies do grow out of it once they start solids. But its bloody miserable until then.
gaviscon or ranitidine should hep a great deal. Also feed thickeners if they are still available (Carobel is made from carob beans), you can still use these if breastfeeding but they are a bit of a faff as you have to mix it to a paste and spoon feed it prior to her BF.
If you do feel she needs pain relief, stick to a paracetamol based one and not an inbuprofen one (this can upset the tummy).

[WilsonFrickett]

It's a bank holiday so you won't get an appointment for a few days, so I what I would do is keep a diary between now and your appointment.

Then before you go into the appointment you can say very clearly this happens every day after I feed her, etc etc.

I also (can't believe I'm typing this in 2013) would take your DP with you to the docs. I know, it's shit, but ime doctors are more receptive when it's a man saying things. (I would normally say fuck that shit, but it's more important you get the help you need right now.)

HV's don't know everything and some GPs are just not very clued up on babies. If you are in a baby group in your town can you ask around? There's one doc in my practice who is known to be very good and pead-focussed iyswim so it's always worth getting and appt with her.

[ButteryJam]

VenusRising, I don't just give her calpol (I have in total only given it 3 times). If she is screaming in pain for more than an hour and sometimes up to two hours and not settling at all (me of course holding her through all this time and trying every single thing I can think of), then I felt I had no choice except to give it, especially when everyone else is saying there is nothing wrong. There's only so much pain you can see your LO go through.

[Deliaskis]

Another vote for silent reflux.

DD had this and was very similar, look out too for kind of separated/curdled milk in spit/vomit (although not likely to be very sick if silent reflux, hence the silent), tongue 'poking', sometimes a bit of 'headbanging' when in pain.

Things that helped were eventually medication, sleeping a bit propped up, smaller feeds (and so more often).

Push push push at doctors, DD was in pain for most of her first 2-3 months until we got her onto medication and got the dose right.

D

[pianodoodle]

My friend's baby was the same she found wearing her in a sling/carrier around the house helped a lot.

She was given something to put in with her formula some kind of drops - and it worked straight away. I bf too so not sure how you incorporate medicine into feeds - maybe a dropper?

Anyway I agree with everyone who says go back to the doctor!

Also I'd be really peeved at the HV saying you were "unlucky" what a load of old bollocks!