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AIBU?

To find people who like making a three act tragedy out of everything v annoying

163 replies

arabesque · 24/06/2013 13:38

One of my colleagues does this and she's getting on people's nerves. Last week her American cousin's husband died suddenly. Very tragic, obviously but my colleague barely knows her cousin and had only met the husband a couple of times. However, on Friday she wouldn't come to another colleague's retirement drinks because 'given her family bereavement it wouldn't really be appropriate and she didn't want to put a dampener on things'. I mean, FFS. Two colleagues have lost their fathers in recent months and she's making more of a fuss than they did.

Last year her mother had her credit card skimmed and this colleague went on as if the woman had been mugged at knife point, talking about how 'shaken up' the whole family were and 'you never really think it will happen to someone you know, do you'.

She took a day off work when her sister was having her appendics out (op in morning, home that afternoon) because she'd only be 'worrying and no use to anyone'.

AIBU to wonder how she will ever cope if she has something serious to cope with and also to feel that there are people in work with real worries and traumas and she should get over herself and stop being such a drama queen?

OP posts:
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Kiriwawa · 25/06/2013 18:43

I used to work with a woman who took 2 days off work because her DP had caught his cock in the zip of his jeans :o

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Overreactionoftheweek · 25/06/2013 18:50

I'm a Leo you bastards! I feel persecuted now, can't believe you're all ganging up on me.

this is the WORST thing that has ever happened Sad

seriously, my heart goes out to those of you having to deal with awful events and these stupid twats on top of that.

p.s. all my DL friends are Virgos!

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StealthPolarBear · 25/06/2013 18:58

Pmsl at "so not the dead dad then"

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YouTheCat · 25/06/2013 19:10

Also a Leo. Grin

The ex mil is an Aries.

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cherrypez · 25/06/2013 19:33

youarewinning I had a boyfriend years ago who was a lifeguard and went on to be convicted of murder...what was the initial of the first name of your colleague?

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youarewinning · 25/06/2013 21:07

cherry Can't remember because not being a DL I've mentioned it until now Wink
It was about 1995/6 though! Down Sarth England (beach lifeguarding)

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fabergeegg · 25/06/2013 21:19

My mother is like this. Everything is about her 'pain'. Here's a good example. I'm disabled as a result of having a child. I've watched (and been very grateful) as DM has done many of the 'fun' bits of babycare like beach walks in the afternoons and popping into town with DD in the buggy. Even taking DD to the doctor's (at my request) seems to be enjoyable wee jaunt as she always sees people she knows and everyone praises her to the heavens. Meanwhile I go stir crazy with cabin fever and pain and DD prefers DM because she likes the action. The other day, I was talking about something I was finding difficult and DM said dramatically, "I pray you will never have to know the pain of watching your child go through this."

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cherrypez · 25/06/2013 21:31

Oh no youarewinning this wouldn't have been the same guy he worked in a swimming pool...what is odd is that the time frame and area is the same...weird!! starting to feel drama llama ish

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youarewinning · 25/06/2013 21:47

He may have been a pool lifeguard too!!!!! I only trained with him and hung out at the beach - I was 15!!!

I'm pretty sure his name started with a G?

Either that or there's an army of murdering lifeguards out there Hmm

Grin

joins in being a bit of a DL!

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youarewinning · 25/06/2013 21:54

Found it! The murdered man started with a G.

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Bogeyface · 25/06/2013 22:28

Ooh freaky about the lifeguard, seems a bit too coincidental!

Weird what come out on here. I was on a thread about a year ago, similar to this but about more sinister liars, and it turns out that the person I had mentioned was currently working with another MNer and still trotting out the same stories. We sent lots of back and forth PM's and yep, it was her! She has, amongst other things, been lost in a poker game by her husband and so had to live with the winner, and played Magenta in Rocky Horror several million times in the West End under her "acting" name that funnily enough never comes up in google searches of the cast. Yeah...alright.... :o

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FruminousBandersnatch · 25/06/2013 23:19

Two murdering lifeguards in the South of England?!

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waterlego6064 · 25/06/2013 23:25

Ahhhh...brilliant thread.

I had a friend at university like this and, as well as leeching on other people's genuine life dramas, she also used to use the word 'trauma' liberally and seriously when talking about very trivial problems of her own, e.g. Her hayfever; her student loan not having come through on time; her printer not working. I wish I was exaggerating but, no, every day was the same: 'All right X? How are you?'
'Oh...don't ask, I'm having a complete trauma...'
And she really did want and expect lots of sympathy for these traumas, but any offers of practical help were usually rebuffed along with excuses as to why they wouldn't help, so that she could bask in her trauma a bit longer.

Also, the people who always have a worse story than someone else are known as 'black catters' as in 'my cat's blacker' :)

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jessjessjess · 26/06/2013 00:20

Oh I met a black catter recently. She actually interrupted me to say: "Oh well that's nothing..." followed by some story I didn't listen to.

The DL I dropped had apparently had traumas including her DP not being able to get a day off work and her guinea pig hurting its claw.

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MeSoFunny · 26/06/2013 00:34

Yeah, but to be fair, tinnitus does blow (noisy) goats.

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vintageclock · 26/06/2013 11:15

Black catter is a brilliant phrase. I must remember it. I have a friend like this. No matter what your story, she can top it. When my mother was seriously ill in hospital, she was very worried about her mother's bad cold because it could so easily turn into pneumonia and they'd have to call an ambulance so she knew exactly how I felt. When I had my womb, cervix and ovaries removed she had recently had a d&c (but it wasn't really a d&c it was 'more serious' than that) so she knew exactly how I was feeling. When her sister was in a nasty accident, she had recently fallen and broken her front tooth so she knew exactly how her sister was feeling.
No one is allowed be going through a worse time than her. It's the law, apparently!

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pinkballetflats · 26/06/2013 12:01

My DM...oh dear god. Whatever is going on in your life she has to trump it somehow. She completely ruined my wedding ( well in fairness, I did for getting it get to me)

She seen to have gotten better...or maybe Imo able to tune it out now...

Some of these examples on this thread are astounding, and some have make me properly chuckle.

Any more for anymore?

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becscertainstar · 26/06/2013 12:48

This thread is briliant. I'm so glad that others notice this and are irritated by it - in RL I'm always so dumb-founded that I don't often call the black catters on their nonsense as I'm just speechless. (excellent name for them, hadn't heard that before!)

I just remembered a colleague years ago who said that it was alright for me as I'd lost three stone in weight with meningitis but she was really STRUGGLING with her diet, and then she burst into tears with the unfairness of it all. Sob, sob, it's so hard, sob, you don't understand, it's alright for you, you're really skinny now and you haven't had to diet at all...sob, sob. (Yes I was indeed very skinny at the time... that'll be the life-threatening meningitis. Soooo much easier than dieting.)

Oh and my DM again. It's like that Peter Kay thing - you phone her up and straight away it's 'Guess who's dead.' Followed by 'It could have been me. It's really shaken me up.' 'How could it have been you Mum?' "Well, she's two years younger than me. And you know I've suffered with FAR worse [insert medical symptom] than she did. And now she's dead. I'm terribly worried. I should go to the doctor. But I hate going to the doctor, you know that.' (That poor doctor, she's down there every week. For someone who hates going to the doctor she's remarkably quick off the mark with booking her appointments.) Of course it wouldn't do to mention that since this person died of whatever Mum is allegedly suffering from this time perhaps they did in fact have it worse than her... Or perhaps Mum never had it at all....

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Nonalphamum · 26/06/2013 13:47

What I find with Drama Llamas too is that they feel the need to document their whole life on Facebook. Whether it's about their latest ailment, of which you will get 1000 updates a day, or if they just popped to the shop for a pint of milk.

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pinkballetflats · 26/06/2013 14:30

Constant cryptic FB updates drive me potty

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youarewinning · 26/06/2013 14:40

yy to cyptic fb posts like -"I give up" and "VILE, some people are just VILE; I'm shaking with rage" and "I feel on a downer as last week I was looking forward to my hen on the weekend"

No 1 - no you don't, your just pissed off you didn't get your own way
No2 - change the record - we know who your talking about and you seem to publically announce enough to how your not entirely innocent in it all
No3 - errrrr, your wedding?

Like pointed out ^^ DL announce so much of their lives even a cryptic FB status you know exactly what they mean Grin

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TheRealFellatio · 26/06/2013 14:47

I loathe cryptic attention seeking status updates that hint of drama and upset but never deliver. They hugely piss me off.

Either tell us, or don't FFS - so childish!

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Oscalito · 26/06/2013 14:50

oh my mother is like this. She's some kind of hospital/drama addict. She barely saw my sick cousin but then she went into hospital and suddenly she was constantly visiting (even though my cousin didn't even know her that well).

She was there for the night my cousin died, went home in the early hours then went back to the hospital at about 3am after she'd died. I don't know why.

She then stalked around in dark sunglasses and went on about how 'it seems like so long since life has been normal...'. She barely knew my cousin, and really didn't need to be there at the deathbed. Not to mention the fact that my cousin had a small son, a father, sisters.... it was like some kind of competition to be the most upset, the most involved, the most saintly. Really grim. I just hope my cousin didn't feel intruded upon....

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Oscalito · 26/06/2013 14:53

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

catinboots · 26/06/2013 15:01

Grief Whore

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