to think that 7pm is not "exceptionally early" bedtime

[fishandlilacs]

for a 5 yr old and 17m old.

A throw away remark from my friend the other day. We were chatting and I commented that my dd rarely sleeps past 6am, I hasten to add this was a comment not a complaint, as a household we have always got up around 6am asmy DH gets up for work at that time. My friend said "well they do go to bed exceptionally early" and it sounded quite judgey to me.
They go to bed at 7pm, the baby goes straight to sleep and DD sometimes reads in her bed for a bit but usually decides to turn the light out before 7.30, at weekends shes allowed up til 8. Any later and she gets tired and emotional and cant cope with school.

[NeedsTherapy]

My 15 month an 2 year old have a bed time of 6pm. They get up every day at 5.30 no matter what time they go to bed and the later they stay up the grumpier they are in the morning and more sleep they need during the day meaning thy go to bed late again and it's a horrible grumpy grouchy cycle full of tantrums and tears!

However saying that dd1 has started sleeping in till 6.30 and I've been spending some 1 on 1 time with her reading stories and talkin about our day so she goes to bed around 6.45.

[mathanxiety]

None of mine ever went before 9. It seemed to be the time they all started to feel tired. I never had the endless evening of children calling for drinks of water, appearing on the stairs demanding attention, etc., that I see complaints of here. They also learned that evenings were not the time for tearing around and that they could and should exist quietly for a few hours, reading, chatting, playing something quietly together. They also learned to eat in a mannerly way and converse with adults at the dinner table. I only served and cleared away one evening meal.

Growing up, mum was a stickler for jammies at around 5.30 and we were packed off at 6 or as soon as dad came home, whichever was first. That regime lasted until we were all about 8.

[mathanxiety]

We normally eat no earlier than 7..

[NeedsTherapy]

I think the moral of the story is if it ain't broke and it works for you, don't fix it! Everyone's kids are different. If yours are happy going to bed at 7pm then enjoy some peace and quiet!

[WhoKnowsWhereTheTimeGoes]

DD was going to bed at 8.30 as a 5 year old, so to me it is exceptionally early (neither of mine have ever had a regular bedtime as early as 7 TBH, even as toddlers it was 7.30), but I would never say that to someone else, that would be a bit rude, each to their own.

[MuseumOfHam]

DS (nearly 6) goes to bed at 7, where he looks at books and winds down, usually falling asleep between 7.30 and 8.He can recognise when he's tired and is happy to go at 7. He wakes at 6.30ish. On weekdays we all eat tea together at 5.30. At weekends there's a seperate grown up tea after 7. Works for us.

Our neighbour's boy is exactly the same age and goes much later and sometimes I'm sure DS can hear him running about after he's in bed, but DS doesn't seem bothered, and the neighbours are doing what works for them - each to their own.

[HenrySugar]

plummyjam there's no reason why you can't keep your dd up to eat with you. The "problem" starts when they have to be up early for school/pre-school so need to be in bed earlier to get enough sleep. When dd1 was a year old or so and able to eat mostly the same as me and DH we used to eat together at 6.30/7.00 and put her to bed by around 8.30. It was lovely as we could go for a walk after dinner during the summer months. Now all at school the dcs have to eat around 5.30 before DH is home. We only eat together at weekends, unless by some miracle DH extracts himself from the office early.

[ChangeNameToday]

Does she have children who still nap? 7 seems early to me simply because DS still needs an afternoon nap and therefore isn't ready for bed till quite a bit later, more like 8.30/9. And we get up later so it all works out. If he wasn't napping, I'm sure he'd be ready for bed by 7.

[deleted203]

Perfectly normal. And was always bedtime for my older DCs up til about age 7.

DS3 (7) goes at 8.00pm which I personally think is too late - and would much rather take him at 7.00pm. The only reason he stays up til this time is that DH gets in from work at about 7.15pm - so unless we let DS3 stay up he wouldn't see his father at all during the week (DH away at 5.00am).

Anyway, it's whatever works for you.

[edwardsmum11]

Sounds normal. My 19mth old is in bed between 5 and 6.

[sherazade]

similiar timings to yours for my dds, now they are 6 and 8 they start getting ready for bed (tidy up, change, brush teeth) at 7 and are in bed by 7.45, asleep by 8 ish. On a hectic day (if we've been out the whole day, for example), they'll still be in bed for 7. Sometimes dd2, 6, will need a 7pm bedtime . But when they were your children's age they were in bed for 6.30/7pm.

[loofet]

I'd say 6-8 is normal time for kids maybe 7 and under.

Mine wake between 7 and 7.30 a.m and go to bed at 6 p.m because they no longer have an afternoon nap (their choice!) and by 6 they're practically on their knees They're 3 and 23 months.

[teaandcakesagoodmummakes]

YANBU at all, my 2 and 5 year olds go to bed at 7pm too and wake at 6am, we tried a later bedtime but they still woke up at 6am and were grumpy all day so 7pm it will stay for now! We allow a later bedtime at weekends or special occasions but as a rule it's 7, lights out latest 7.30pm. My DSIL is always commenting its early, her 8 year old goes to bed at 10pm, but they have to wake her up for school and can't understand why she's so grumpy after school

[Bunbaker]

"7 is normal."

It was never normal for DD to go to bed at that time. She simply was never tired. She has never been a child to need much sleep though.

[LemonsLimes]

It's the amount of the sleep they get that matters rather than the bedtime.

[treas]

I knew of a friend of a friend who would put her 8 and 6 y.o. to bed at the same time of 17:30. The 8 y.o. had no social life outside of school.

Now that I call exceptionally early.

[hufflebottom]

DD (3) goes to bed at 7, but we read a story and are out of her room by 7.30, she goes to bed at 8 on a friday and saturday.

Someone i knew used to send her dc to bed at 9. when they were 3, and i thought that was too late for a 3 yo

[Misspixietrix]

YNBU DC's (7 & 4) latest Bedtime is 7:30pm ~

[lljkk]

i don't remember being alllowed up past 9pm unless it was a special occasion even when i was 17.



I think around 7pm is common for under 8s, but sadly my children don't sleep like that . I think my 5yo falls asleep around 9:30pm most nights & he wakes me up around 7:30am. I wouldn't want him waking up any earlier. Others didn't sleep any more than 10 hours at same age.

[Gilberte]

"What I want to know is, in the cultures/countries where children stay up late, how do they possibly get enough sleep? They can't ALL be one of those kids who doesn't need much sleep."

Seems like a lot of Spanish children are sleep deprived.

sleep.health.am/sleep/more/children-do-not-wake-up-feeling-refreshed/

[jamtoast12]

Dds 7&5 go at 8pm but 9pm on Saturdays. They are rarely tired before then plus we like the extra "family time" then. Though after 7 is strictly "chill out" with TV or books time

[mercibucket]

as i would be horrified by 6am awakenings, mine go to bed around 9

[mathanxiety]

But how many British children are sent to bed at 7 and end up bothering parents for an hour and a half, or reading for a couple of hours? Are they getting the sleep they need?

My DCs have always started school at 8 and have been up at 7 for most of their lives (or at least from when the oldest started school).

I think a lot of people around the world scratch their heads and wonder what it is that British children do all day that exhausts them so much they need to be in bed by 7.

[IHateSafeStyle]

Well seeing as mine have to be up at 6 to be out of the house for 7, they oh just last till 7pm

[Mominatrix]

9 year old has a strict bedtime of 8:30 (in bed at 8, reading until 8:30) and 5 year old has a bedtime of 7:00. Elder's bedtime gradually shifted from 7 to 8:30 from the time he was about 7. There was a time he was going to bed later than 8:30 - more towards 9/9:30, and we were getting notes from his teachers about him yawning in class and not being alert. These stopped once his bedtime was strictly enforced again.

As we need to be out of the house by 7:40am and they are morning dawdlers, wake-up time is between 6:30 and 6:45. Their bedtimes could not be later or they would not get enough sleep to be alert at school.