To think their is NOTHING wrong with extended breastfeeding or wet nursing?

[Thisisaname]

Look at the comments below

I was researching extended breastfeeding and came across this.
I see nothing wrong with this, I wouldn't be 'scared' for life if I could remember being breast fed or found out I was given someone else's milk.
I think the only 'scarring' would come from going from the natural environment of being fed from something to then finding out a large majority find it sexual, not the actual feeding itself.

[BimbaBirba]

Erm, no. I wish it was admiration. It was more like a blunt "why are you still doing that" (plus disgusted face).

[TotallyKerplunked]

Any looks I have had seem to be embarresment or curriosity, the only negative opinions come from PIL and they haven't ever seen me BF!

[PrettyKitty1986]

Personally I find the thought a bit icky...but as long as the woman bf doesn't feel so wonderful about it that she has to make a huge point and practically flap her baps in people's faces in public (which to be fair is not the exclusive territory of the extended breast feeders anyway) then I couldn't really care less if people continue to feed into adulthood seeing as it doesn't affect me.

[Branleuse]

i think its completely normal and know many people that did /do, although i got fed up with it each time around the 6mth mark

[BimbaBirba]

What a ridiculous post prettykitty

[allwaysthebaddie]

bertie are you breast feeding any other chidren? Have you kept your milk up? As if he now feeds very infrequently and you doubt he is even getting any, why would you let him try? If he is having no dietry benifit out of it why are you letting him continue?

Only if it is due to him feeling close to you, im sure there are ways that a four year old can do that with out suckling on a dry breast.

[EauRouge]

I find that most people are just curious- at least that's how I interpret most of the questions I get I have the hide of a rhino - but I have had people tell me that I'm mad and recently my grannie told me (within earshot of 4yo DD1) that I should stop because it's bad for her. Another elderly relative also voiced her concerns via my DM. I shrugged it off but I don't like people saying things in front of or directly to DD1, that's not fair on her.

I think people tend to be more critical online, but that's true of most things.

[slatternlymother]

See, bimba and totally I think I'd be genuinely curious. I've never met anyone who's done it, and I'd want to ask questions and stuff. Obviously that's not acceptable. But my look of 'oooooh, look at that! Wow!' Would probably be misinterpreted as disgust/prying

I used to think it was weird and icky or whatever. Then I became a mum myself. Whilst we didn't bf as it didn't work out and we had no support (not through lack of begging midwives for help; they were too busy to help us ), because DS was a sicky baby and didnt move onto cows milk until he was nearly 2; I'm not sure if we'd have stopped bf necessarily. Perhaps I'd not have put him to the breast the whole time, but an expressed cup of milk? Well, why not? But then, it never happened so I can't be sure. Anyhow, now that I have a toddler of my own, I can see how you could just carry on.

[EauRouge]

I think it depends how you ask. If you said something like "I'm curious, mind if I ask a few questions?" then they'd probably be happy to talk to you. If you jumped straight in with "how long are you planning to do that?" then it could be taken the wrong way.

[PrettyKitty1986]

Why's that bimba?

[Stixswhichtwizzle]

Before having my DD I genuinely believed (no real experience of BF) that BF past 6 months was 'unnecessary'. When pregnant and in the v v early newborn stage 6 months remained a goal but now we're nearing that there's no way she's ready to stop!! I cant imagine feeding her when she's 3 but I could imagine reaching the stage we're at now. We'll take it as it comes.

Nothing wrong with extended BF but not sure I could wet nurse. The live I feel for DD in those wee hours whilst BF is so strong. I can't imagine BF a baby that isn't mine nor would I use a wet nurse. A milk bank maybe especially if she'd been prem etc

[Stixswhichtwizzle]

couldn't imagine

[slatternlymother]

eau good grief, no I'd never dream of asking questions. Tis rather rude and probing, but I'm just saying that perhaps when you're doing something that's perceived to be 'wrong' by some members of society, perhaps you could misinterpret the looks of onlookers?

[allwaysthebaddie]

oxford just being nosey thats all!

Sort of get what kitty says.. I totally wholey endorse bf, the benifits to mum and child are unlimited, I never breastfed out in public but some of my friends did, very discretly.

For me EBF till 4,5,6,7 + is too much but each to there own.

[shallweshop]

I think breastfeeding a child who is walking, talking and eating a good, varied diet is completely unnecessary and not what nature intended. We are supposed to teach our children how to live as confident, independent individuals and, no matter how much they enjoy some things - breast, dummy, nappies, sleeping in your bed etc, we teach them how to let go, grow up and move on to the next stage. I think in a lot of cases, extended breastfeeding is more the mother enjoying it and not wanting to let go.

[EauRouge]

slatternly I don't know, I've never really noticed anyone looking TBH. I think most people don't notice or it doesn't occur to them that you might be BF an older child. I see what you are saying though, I think some people can be more sensitive than others. That's true of any parenting choice though, I've heard of FF mums who think they are being judged for giving a bottle. I don't think it's exclusive to breastfeeding.

shallweshop at 'not what nature intended'. It is exactly what nature intended. Maybe read the thread before commenting? All of your points have already been addressed and there is a link about the natural weaning age of humans that you might find interesting.

[BertieBotts]

always No, I have no other children. I don't know enough about milk supply to know how the supply keeps up, but I know my friend who stopped at 2ish continued to produce milk for several months after stopping. Why do I let him, well, because he asked and it helped him to sleep on those occasions and I didn't see a reason to say no. If there is a reason to say no, which might be because I've already kissed him goodnight and gone to leave and I feel he's just stalling, or it might be because there are other people around or it might be that I just feel "uuuugh no I can't cope with that now" then I say no and he accepts that and it's fine.

BTW, since you ask, and I was curious, I have just squeezed to see if I produce milk and I do, although it appears to be very yellow, almost like colostrum! I had noticed recently that I had been getting the little crusty bits of milk you get in pregnancy when he hadn't fed for a few days - how very strange. Am definitely not pregnant BTW

[BertieBotts]

I breastfed in public until DS was about 2 and I think maybe twice before he was 3. I ONCE had a man do a double take. That was it.

[IneedAsockamnesty]

Shamelessly marking place because I'm rather interested in this topic

[thesnootyfox]

I don't like the idea of a wet nurse it feels far too intimate. I also hated watching anyone other than dh feed my babies with a bottle. I wasn't prepared for that emotion. It was very odd.

I think bfing or ffing a child of school age is unnecessary but each to their own. Bfing a child over the age of 8 (is that even possible?) is weird.

[slatternlymother]

eau see I think ff mums are overly defensive. One mum I used to knock about with gave me the whole story about why she couldn't bf as she fed her dd for the first time in front of me. She was a bit panicked, as if I'd judge her. Who gives a shit?

Option A: BF. Option B: FF. As long as you don't choose Option C: not feeding at all; there isn't a problem.

[shallweshop]

Eaurouge - I did read the thread and still decided to post as they are my own thoughts on the subject and felt they needed reiterating. What quite disturbed me was the post near the beginning about a child who is nearly in double figures who has only recently stopped breastfeeding - sorry but nothing can convince me that that is as nature intended!

[BertieBotts]

I think 9 must be on the absolute upper end. As I said before I'm not convinced that ALL children's jaws change shape between 6 and 7, DS's seems to be already, so it makes sense that it might not happen until 8 or 9 for some children.

[5madthings]

Its not extended feeding, JTS normal term feeding. It is the biological norm but sadly in our society its seen as pick and yuck.

Two if my boys bfed till over three years, ds2 was nearly four when he weaned. It wasn't something I planned, it just happened. With ds1i gave bfeeding a go and it worked, he stopped at 18mths, looking back I can now see it was a nursing strike Ashe was teething. The others just fed and it naturally came to an end. It didn't feel odd its just what happened and it is normal.

[5madthings]

Its norma l term feeding, notjts?!!