was OH being unreasonable re work

[milf90]

OH is a teacher and his school was shut yesterday and closed early friday (but the head left it way too late, 2 of the school coaches crashed and there was a big accident outside the school making it nearly impossible for anybody to leave. it took OH 2 hours to do a 15 minute journey).

The head is a bit of a nob tbh. nobody likes her, she seems to hate her staff and likes to turn them against each other. it makes the school an unpleasant place to work at times. she really has it against my OH - when i was in hospital with a suspected ectopic pregnancy she thought he was lying about it and asked a lot of personal questions before he was allowed to leave to see me in hospital (on a afternoon where he had no classes or other responsibilities apart from marking might i add...). Last school year she also got in big trouble because she flipped at OH for doing something (He didnt do anything wrong at all) and called him a lot of names and when OH complained to deputy she had to back track a lot and got in a bit of trouble!!

anyway back to the point - this morning OH couldnt get his car to move at all. its a rear wheel drive, very impractical car tbf, but the road conditions on our estate are treacherous. he tried for about 20-30 minutes to get his car out and failed miserably. it was also very icey and he fell over 3 times trying to do this. he called his friend who works at the school and lives nearby for a lift, but he couldnt get hold of him. He rang school and explained the situation and asked if anybody could pick him up. he explained that it is very dangerous to walk on the pavements and road because tis so slippy (last week i fractured my coccyx because i slipped over on the ice and it wasnt anywhere near as bad as it is now). he had a phone call back off the head asking him to explain himself and said she didnt care how icey it was, he needs to walk or get a bus.

the bus is a good 10/15 minute walk away on a good day and is all up hill by busy roads. IT is also another 10 minute walk when he has gotten off the bus (on a normal day). OH fell over SEVEN times on his way - he now has a sprained ankle, sprained wrist and has hurt his back.

do you think OH was unreasonable to say he didnt think he could get to work? or was the head unreasonable for making him walk and get bus to work in dangerous conditions??

[Matildaduck]

He's lame my dh got to work and we live rurally.

Get some decent shoes park on the main road.

[Arthurfowlersallotment]

The head sounds like a very difficult person to work with. I can see how he would not enjoy going to work with someone like that.

However as far as getting to work is concerned, he could get the bus if it's running. In not nailing myself to a cross here but if I could stick my wellies on and plough through snow and ice to get public transport from the suburbs at 7 months pregnant last year then your husband can put some decent boots on and give it a valiant attempt. My 60 year old colleague who has arthritis also made it into work.

[littlemisssarcastic]

Most of the snow and ice is melting where I am. I can't imagine falling over 10 times where I am. unless i was wearing flip flops
I can only assume you live a long way away from me. (SE, UK).
Tbh, if the weather is that bad and I had fallen over 10 times resulting in those injuries. I don't think I would risk going to work, no.
Depends where you are OP.
Did your dh go in to work?

[choceyes]

"Is he a geography teacher, by any chance?"

haha! that's what my DH (a science teacher) would say

[Alibabaandthe40nappies]

YABU

The situation at work does sound horrible, but that isn't an excuse.

My DH is a contractor - if he doesn't go to work then he doesn't get paid, which rather tends to sharpen the mind in these circumstances.

We have winter tyres on the car, appropriate footwear for walking on ice, we have cleared and gritted our driveway and the piece of road directly behind that we turn out onto.
We have scrapers, de-icer, show shovel and a piece of carpet (to put under the drive wheels of the car if it gets stuck) in each car.

If your DH does a job where he needs to be onsite then he should be similarly prepared. Otherwise it just looks as if he is using the weather to take some extra paid leave.

[Viviennemary]

People need to be able to get to work from where they live. So I don't think the Head was unreasonable to tell him either come to work or lose a day's pay. But there should be some leniency for lateness in the bad weather. So he needs a more practical car and decent footwear for snow.

[MrsKeithRichards]

You sound like a pair of incompetent muppets.

[MerylStrop]

YABU, it's his responsibility to get to work and to have a plan for bad weather.

H/T was a bit harsh, possibly. But the backstory is irrelevant here.

[ChunkyPickle]

YABU just about how icy your own driveway is. The neighbours and I have made sure our path and communal drive is clear of snow, and put down salt, because we don't want to slip on the ice.

Being a martyr and slipping and sliding rather than actually doing something about it is ridiculous.

I took DS to the child minder this morning, parked on the main road (which was clear) and walked down the still icy (it seems their neighbours also can't be bothered to grit - despite having 2 grit bins). I took some dishwasher salt with me to provide grip as I walked in any tricky spots (goodness I sound prepared and bootstrappy - but I'm really not).

Ice doesn't mean you need to lock yourself inside, it just means you have to get off your bum and do a little bit of work to clear it!

[PessaryPam]

You should use burnt cake crumbs to sprinkle over the snow in lieu of salt.

[milf90]

You sound like a pair of incompetent muppets

eurgghh theres no need to be nasty!

i cant exactly go and shovel snow at the moment with a bad back and its irrelevant because OH was parked on the road!

yes it would have been better to have boots and studs - but he doesnt. i had snow boots on when i fell over earlier in the week

[IneedAsockamnesty]

The only time it is ever acceptable to not attend work is if the area you live or the area you work is currently on a red transportation alert ( or what ever its called) and that's only if its not within walking distance or if you are ill infirm or at greater risk from falling.

[cory]

If your driveway is that slippery, surely that reflects on the householder who has not cleared it and/or gritted it?

[milf90]

again his car is on the road...

[milf90]

we also dont have any grit btw, no grit bins around here at all and we dont have our own supply. (should probably moan to council about that tbh, this is the first place iv lived with no bins!)

[msrisotto]

Honest to god it's excuse after excuse! He needs to be prepared, get some grips like these, they're not expensive, get the bus and walk!

[BettySwollocksandaCrustyRack]

But we all knew the snow was coming. We don't have grit bins either and I don't know anywhere who does, not round here that's for sure.

As the by scouts say....be prepared. It's not like the snow was a massive shock for everyone. God forbid, buy your own grit/salt or whatever, tell your DH to get some decent shoes and stop making a fuss about going to work.

[LadyMargolotta]

You can get a bag of road salt. That's what we have. Although grit is better for the environment. I don't understand why you haven't cleared the ice/snow on the driveway?

Your dh does need to take the responsibility of getting himself to work. He should have decent shoes at the very least.

[FeltOverlooked]

Why didn't he grit around the car so he didn't fall over while trying to move it?

I haven't gritted our driveway (as no-one uses it really) but I have gritted my route from door to car and around the car so I can clear the windows, etc, without sliding over. You can just shake the grit in front of you as you go, so leaving a safe path.

[FeltOverlooked]

I bought my grit at Tesco and carried it home on the bus!

I have never seen a grit bin.

[PessaryPam]

These are cheaper
www.ebay.co.uk/itm/10-STUD-UNIVERSAL-ICE-NO-SLIP-SNOW-SHOE-SPIKES-GRIPS-CLEATS-QUALITY-CRAMPONS-UK-/380381005604?pt=UK_Sporting_Goods_Climbing_Mountaineering&var=&hash=item5890798724

[cory]

milf90 Tue 22-Jan-13 13:42:28
"we also dont have any grit btw, no grit bins around here at all and we dont have our own supply. (should probably moan to council about that tbh, this is the first place iv lived with no bins!) "

I think you will find that other people are organising themselves, clearing snow off driveways before it freezes, buying their own salt and grit, making sure they are wearing adequate foot wear. If the head sees that everybody else can manage this and your dh can't- then he is going to wonder. Your having a bad back is no excuse for your dh not to shovel snow, is it?

[FeltOverlooked]

I might add, I gritted the path not just for me but also for the postman, milkman, etc, who come down it. I personally think it is irresponsible to leave it all slippery and slidy.