To get annoyed when they don't like the idea?

[JoshLyman]

Every Xmas and birthday I get asked for present ideas for the DC. MIL is the worst offender on this score, she badgers and badgers and badgers.

I struggle to come up with stuff as they are young and not 'into' much yet plus they get loads of presents anyway.

Then when I do, I've been met with 'Oh, that's boring' or 'Hmmm, I'll think about it' or an otherwise turned up nose.

It pisses me off as I then have to think of something else that meets their approval. I know they don't want to spend money on something they don't like but it's what the DC like that matters isn't it? Why bloody ask in the first place if you're going to get what you want anyway?

AIBU?

[Abbicob]

No - YANBU - I suppose they only want to buy presents that will be useful so it's nice that they ask but they should not keep badgering you for ideas once you have told them.

[Loveweekends10]

No YANBU. My sis in law does this. It's pure laziness because she cant be bothered to think for herself.
And anyone who says I am being uncharitable has never met her.
There is a difference between someone like my brother who genuinely buys the kids stuff I need for them so always asks and someone who asks for suggestions then spends weeks ringing up saying this and that wasn't available etc etc ( cos she hasn't looked) and then buys some pink tat from pound stretcher.

[SpectralMissSpooky]

Family can suck at times!

My mum and I are both crap at coming up with ideas for Christmas so she gives them cash for the sales, and a couple of token bits for under the tree:)

My niece wants a skateboard for Christmas. I hate the things, think they're useless and that she'll get bored quickly. I've bought one though, as that's what she wants. Not hard really.

[glentheburningbattleostrich]

YANBU.

I'm a childminder with a house full of toys anyway so when asked or told they are getting xyz I usually have to point out that we already have it or just don't have room for it.

I suggested to DMIL that DD would like some new story books this year and was told that books are not a proper present because children don't like books. (In the same call she told me how DNiece (15) is only being predected a D at English, with that attitude I wonder why!)

I was also told girls don't play with garages or tool belts, which she may want to tell DD who loves her cars and that the castle I ordered for DSIL wasn't pink and they might send it back.

Sorry turned into a rant!

[HecatePhosphorus]

Why not just tell them? "I'd really rather not, because every time I do, you look at me like I've just jumped onto the table and crapped on your dinner. So pick it yourself"

Or something less likely to result in ww3 while you amuse yourself with fantasies of saying that

[NoTeaForMe]

On the flip side my sisters in laws buy her kids so much that she always says to me, just get clothes. They are little kids and don't want clothes, they want toys! I know that they get given a ridiculous amount by her in laws but honestly the restrictions I have on what I can and can't get them because of this is unfair!

I do think it's always a good idea to ask parents though, you won't be the only person buying for that child and otherwise try may easily end up with 2/3 of things!

[LimeLeafLizard]

YANBU - this drives me nuts too.

Mum - If you cba to think of a present, give cash or give nothing but come and spend some time with them, getting to know them for a change.

[redexpat]

YANBU! I got bullied for requests for DS's half birthday (WTAF?!) so eventually came up with some requests and got given totally random stuff instead. Some of it is useful but some stuff just had to go back to the shop because we didnt have space for it.

[EndoplasmicReticulum]

I get this. I try to give a vague answer so there is some element of decision making on their behalf. E.g. for son 1 "Lego" and for son 2 "something that has wheels".

I also get "I'll send you some money, would you buy something, wrap it, write my name on it and put it under the tree".

[LimeLeafLizard]

Arrggh, endo, that is another bugbear of mine, too, the whole having to wrap presents on someone elses behalf - like I don't have a huge heap of my own wrapping to do!