Children getting dirty, wet, messy

[emma0134]

Question is if I am sane or mad.

When I was growing up my mum was nuts on use looking perfect, hair had to be combed, clothing tidy and clean. If we got a smug on our clothes she would not be pleased, rubbing at the stain and going on and on.

Now I am the mum, twin girls aged seven. Although I dress them nicely and cleanly they are free, no encouraged not to worry whether their clothes get dirty, wet, muddy or even torn.

Mum as I expect goes mad at me, yesterday (Saturday) went Blackpool and the girls ended up not only going into the sea with all their clothes on then throwing sand at each other but then walking down the prom in their socks ( what did people think).

Friend was over when they ended up covering themselves in paint and she found this very odd i allow them to do this. Today a neighbour came to report them splashing themselves in rain puddles in the field.

In fact I get pleasure seeing them come in the bottom of their white socks dirty, their clothes a mess, their hair all over the place, sometimes I even don't comb their hair at weekends. So am I normal or mad?

[mummyosaurus]

I'm with you.

Mine start the day clean, but I have a washing mountain at the end of most days.

[BikeRunSki]

Isn't that what children are meant to do?

I did.
DS does.
Persil love me.

[PureBloodMuggle]

I'm with DandyLioness on this

There's a difference between not minding them getting mucky, and encouraging/deliberately acting just to them to be mucky.

Two boys here, one is a daily grub magnet, the other not so much.

Having a cleanliness required at all time mother can be very hard on a child I'm sure,things like jumping in puddles and rolling down grassy slopes is a requirement of childhood (possibly should be law)

[GrimmaTheNome]

I remember in a Penelope Leach book, she didn't lay down many rules but she was pretty positive that you really shouldn't have a clean toddler by the end of the day unless the last thing you did was swimming . I reckoned she was right - mudpies, finger painting etc def good in my book.


Yet, I remember FIL making some comment about how clean I kept DD. I was a bit as she didn't much like baths - then I realised, she had totally clean clothes at least once every day.

[emma0134]

Not sure why it is weird or bad manners, neither do I deliberately buy cheap clothes so they can be replaced, I do not think I replace clothes much more regularly then others, or do I wash much more. Clothes need replacing anyway as they grow out of them, the colours fade, they get fuzz on them and even if your careful they get damaged sometimes.

[CeliaFate]

once the formalities were over their shoes were off and it was ojk to get cream and dirt and to wipe their hands on their dresses. Allowing your children to wipe their hands on their dresses IS bad manners - do you wipe your hands on your clothes? Nobody I know does. I think you're doing a disservice to your children by not teaching them basic good manners like using a tissue/napkin/wet wipe to clean their hands, but clearly we have very different ideas.

[pommedechocolat]

Yes, even dd 18 months knows the principles of wiping. She can't do it very well and often chooses daddy's jeans as her tissue/napkin but still they can try and help a little bit from very young with keeping themselves more clean than compost heaps.

[Sirzy]

Personally as much as I think children shouldn't have to worry about getting dirty it shouldn't be encouraged and there has to be limits.

Going in the sea fully dressed is just odd IMO, especially if you don't have clean clothes. Walking around in no shoes I wouldn't do either.

Ds has great fun playing in mud and puddles but only when he is dressed sensibly to do so!

[Jen00X]

I used to play out in my white socks, splash around in the lake (well old quarry) that was nearby and run around the beach nude when i was a child.

This does not happen now.

I have noticed people even make their children wear shoes on the beach

[Sirzy]

That would probably be because of the amount of crap that other people leave on the beach!

[emma0134]

Sorry CeliaFate but I do see people wiping their hands on their clothes all the time. OK it would be rude sat round a table in a formal setting, but once it is over then what is so wrong with doing so. End of the day if the dresses are slightly dirty or filthy they still need washing

And again Sirzy, what is so wrong with getting wet, they soon dry and why is it wrong to walk round with no shoes on?

[littlemisssarcastic]

Are you happy for your DC to wipe their hands down their clothes forever? Or only until a particular age?

[Sirzy]

Because there is a time and a place for everything. Walking in most places with no shoes is pretty dangerous anyway. If your going to the beach what's wrong with taking some suitable clothes for in the water?

And as for saying it's ok to wipe hands on clothes well sorry that's just odd.

[HidingInTheBathroom]

I am sorry but I can not keep my children looking clean and tidy for 2 minutes

I would love just for once for them to look all clean but no they are always covered in mud, food, snot on sleave etc

But I like it. They are happy being mucky yucky kids and if I changed them every time they got dirty I would have 2 mountains of washing not just one.

[acsec]

I don't think any of you are mums of the children in my class - I get told off by some mums if their child gets grubby! One of the reasons they wear a uniform, surely, is so they don't spoil their 'home' clothes?!

[HidingInTheBathroom]

One of my friends work in a nursery and they get high rate parents if the DC come home with a mark on there clothes.

I once posted on here about a trip to the farm. A guy was there with his DC dressed to nines little girl in a white dress he then shouted at them for playing in the sand pitt as they where getting dirty. Some people make me laugh

[emma0134]

Sirzy Walking in most places with no shoes is pretty dangerous, why, how?

And there is nothing wrong with taking taking some suitable clothes for in the water when going to the beach, but then what is wrong with allowing them to go in the water with what they were wearing. It wasn't meant to be a day out at the beach, it was meant to be a day out at the fair and arcades we just ended up on the beach.

No one made them go into the sea, no one made them go walking down the prom with no shoes.

They don't go out to ruin their clothes, well not usually, but they just don't ned to worry if they do get them wet or muddy or dirty

[smartyparts]

My kids seem to be permanently filthy and quite right too!

[smartyparts]

...I don't mean that they don't wash, they do - lots. It's just that they get incredibly mucky during the day.

[Sirzy]

You get random bits of alsorts on the pavement, seemingly even more so at sea side resorts. The amount of times I have ended up with drawing pins in my shoes, or standing on glass (because you can't watch where you walk all the time!) it seems a daft risk to take when not needed.

You - in my opinion - seem to be taking the freedom to get dirty to far. There is nothing wrong with children learning there is a time and a place for everything is there? What's wrong with saying "no you cant do that because..." it won't harm them!

[whomovedmychocolate]

I think there is massive value in clean hands and feet. Mine get mucky but as long as their faces and hands are clean I think you can get away with a few stains.

[CeliaFate]

OP why did you post here? Every time somebody gives you a reason why they disagree you just ask the same questions.

In answer to your original post - Yabu, you are mad.