to think you can't change babysitting arrangements once the child is already with the babysitter?

[TidyDancer]

My friend is looking after the baby DS of a friend of hers today, on the understand that the baby would be picked up two hours after he was dropped off. My friend has other things she needs to do today, including picking up her own daughter from the GPs, but it's all been delayed because the mum of the baby she is looking after at the moment has 'decided' she can't pick up until two hours after the agreed time. My friend is a soft touch and has not demanded the baby be picked up on time, but she has expressed her annoyance that she wasn't told about the changed time until the baby was with her. She can hardly leave him on the doorstep for pick up can she?

So AIBU in thinking that unless an emergency comes up during the time someone is babysitting your child(ren) (and this is not an emergency, FWIW), you should stick to the pick up time and not take the piss?

[TidyDancer]

Yes, exactly Hell. I have children, I know things don't always run to schedule with them, but I know if I'm stuck somewhere and I'm late picking them up, I will fully apologise.

[HellAtWork]

I'd be laying it on thick about how disappointed your friend's DD was to not do x y or z because she couldn't be picked up from her GP's in time if I were your friend.

I think if the other mum had been remotely apologetic your friend wouldn't feel quite so 'used'.

[TidyDancer]

I'm not sure exactly what she said word for word, she didn't specify.

She wasn't 'slagging off' the other mum to me, she just said what happened, there was no gratuitous moaning, don't worry.

[cjbartlett]

Think it's a bit poor of your friend to be slagging off the other mum to you tbh
not very friendly is it?

[TidyDancer]

AFAIK, the mum contacted to say the thing was going to make her two hours late, there was not even a request to keep the baby with her, she just went on the assumption that my friend would do it, without question. It was only when my friend made a small fuss about it, that the baby was even mentioned.

[TidyDancer]

I do know the mum a little bit myself, and she tends to be a bit oblivious to things like this. My friend is adament that she told the mum she had stuff to do, but I don't think that matters really, you make arrangements, you stick to them. The thing that has 'come up' is not an emergency, so the priority should've been to pick up her child I think.

[ChaoticAngelofLitha]

But the OP's friend has things she needs to do and from the post it sounds like the other mum has simply decided she won't be able to pick her DC up without actually asking if it's okay.

YANBU

[cookielove]

Totally agree and i am a paid baby sitter, not only is it annoying but it is inconsiderate and rude. Ooh i could list all the things that parents have done to annoy me, but that would be unprofessional

[HellAtWork]

Well if your friend is owed a favour back for this I think I might be so petty as to ensure I have my favour returned and be a bit cavalier about their time as well. And then just draw a line under the 'favours'.It does really depend on why the mum 'decided' to delay pick up by 2 hours - no emergency, justification, excuse, etc?

Am assuming by your tone Mum was not apologetic or would you mind about it, really sorry etc?

[TidyDancer]

It's a favour, no payment. They do each other favours sometimes for different things, but no money changes hands. I just think it's a massive piss take to do this to someone when they've got little option but to comply.

[HellAtWork]

Extremely rude - like you say poor babysitter is stuck.

Is your friend being paid for this or is it a favour?

[MorticiaAddams]

YANBU and hopefully your friend will say No in future and tell her why if asked.