to really dislike the newborn stage?

[CharlotteBronteSaurus]

DD2 is 5 weeks. She was a very welcome surprise, but by god I had blanked out how rotten the newborn stage is. She has three states: sleeping, feeding, and screaming. The latter predominates; the former is rare and very hard won. Occasionally I get rewarded with a smile, but most often these are reserved for the cat.

I am a knackered, scruffy harridan, barking at poor DD1 and fat through ready meals and comfort chocolate. AIBU to be counting down the days until she's a lovely giggly 6month old?

[CharlotteBronteSaurus]

hairy, i am sorry for your losses.

[wayoftheworld]

It does not mean that we hate them...I can not see any mother say that about their children. It's only that you come to appreciate more some of the stages in your children lives. I felt more comfortable dealing with mine over one years, as they could be a bit more interactive, but I know my MIL always loved the 0 -1 age because "you find them where you put them!!". I like to run around with mine and do things together...each to their own!!

[carriedafirework]

yanbu, its bloody hard work.

soon be a giggling 6 month old

hang in there

[pigletmania]

Hairyfairy I am for you, but I cannot change my feelings and how I felt at the time. I love my dd to bits and I always have, and feel priviledged to be her mum, that does not mean I did not want her or did not love her not at all, just that I found the newborn baby stage damn hard and that it was not my favourite bit in my dd life. We are all entitled to our feelings, for us it was not the most joyus bit

[LynetteScavo]

YABU....when they are crawling and weaning and teething, the newborn stage will seem a doddle.

[wayoftheworld]

pigletmania one day we will look upon these days with tinted glasses and rembember only the good things. When our future in laws will complain we will wander what is all the fuss about??? hang on I sound like my MIL already!!!

[pigletmania]

Not for me no Lynette, I prefer the toddler/preschool stage, you can reason with them, do things and get better night sleep.

[wayoftheworld]

Lynette than comes schooling, friends and bulling....

[pigletmania]

Lol wyaoftheworld, yes as the bad things fade unto oblivon as the years go by. We are having great difficulty having a dc2 so I am trying to savour every moment with dd, as I might not have a number 2

[darleneconnor]

hairy- why would you assume that just because someone posts about the realities of parenthood, that they dont also know the pain of miscarriage?

Why read threads like this if you know that you will be upset by them? It's not like anyone has said anything nasty.

[PressureDrop]

I found the first year hard work with my first baby. He was a 'sleep-feed-or scream lots' baby, too. I was a fat , barking harridan that whole year . I found 3-4 yrs quite a challenge with him, too, though . Now almost 6 yrs old and really enjoying his funny little personality now.

Second baby - newborn stage was a dream. She slept loads for the first 6 months and was peaceful and smiley when she was awake.She is 2 yrs old now and still a delight. I can only imagine that she'll be one hell of a stroppy teen

[LynetteScavo]

Oh, I do like a child you can reason with!

[pigletmania]

Well yes lynette, instead of screaming and screaming, I can acutally talk to her and is easier to calm down than a bawling baby.

[Wallace]

motherinferior - god yes i find 9 year old girls hard work!

[hairyfairylights]

people are allowed to talk about them and find them difficult (I've been around enough (neices and nephews) to know that it's not easy)

However, there are some really awful comments here, which, if you read them back from the perspective of someone who can't have a newborn, or has miscarried, then you will realise just how very insensitive they are. :(

[hairyfairylights]

"hairy- why would you assume that just because someone posts about the realities of parenthood, that they dont also know the pain of miscarriage?"

I don't. Where have I said that?

[PressureDrop]

Oh come on. We have to be able to have some light banter and let off steam.

I have had two miscarriages and all sorts of other awful pregnancy-and-birth related experiences which I won't bore you all with now, but I am allowed to say 'the newborn stage was fucking horrendous in my experience', surely?

[hairyfairylights]

It's not light banter, people using words like 'hate'. The light banter bits I get, I have no issue with that, but some of the posts are really quite insensitive.

Bully for you with all your pregnancy related issues, it's not a competition.

[hairyfairylights]

and this is, after all, AIBU. So the answer is yes, and I've illustrated why.

[PressureDrop]

Maybe you should step off the thread if you can't post without such hostility? Blimey.

[thefurryone]

Sorry hairyfairy but I think you're being a little bit self-absorbed I've read this whole thread and no one is saying that they hate their children just that some stages of parenting are more challenging than others. I've actually found most of the thread to be quite tongue in cheek.

It's very sad for you that you have suffered but try and be a bit gentle on yourself, clicking on threads about new born babies clearly just upsets you and having a go at people for talking about their parenting experiences isn't going to make your pain go away.

[pigletmania]

Hairy yes I hated the newborn stage, not my beautiful dd. If you are having problems with ttc, than a thread about people who have just had a baby talking about newborn baby stages is not the thread for you as you will be sensitive about it. I would step back from this thread.

[AnnieLobeseder]

Hairy, I'm sorry you're being upset by this thread, but instead of having a go at us, why it just ignore it? People have lost husbands, sisters, mothers on MN. But that doesn't mean that other people won't post about what a twunt their DH, DM, DSis is currently being. We can't post on eggshells all the time.

I hope you have a frustrating newborn of your own soon, I really do.