Afghan refugees started dd school

[onedancetwostep]

How would you feel?
How would you make them feel welcome?

How would you like your own children to be treated if they were ripped apart from their friends and family and toys and pets and put into a new school in a foreign language, with nobody to help or comfort them?

@lostmyvoice1

nobody to help or comfort them?

This bit isn’t true, a lot of work/effort/thought/time/planning/resources goes into it

Given that children at our naice middle class village primary racially abused a child in reception, I’m not confident that a minority wouldn’t spout anti immigration, racist nonsense at the child, learnt at their parents’ knee.

I admire the optimism in this thread, but I don’t share it.

They aren't aliens...

@thanksamillion

As someone who lived abroad when my children were primary age and I was learning the language I found the most useful thing was a parent friend who was patient enough to explain what the heck was going on. Think of all the things that happen that aren't really explained (red nose day/comic relief/Christmas events) and really break them down (what's needed/expected/what's the dress code etc). It was so hard to work out all the cultural things that are blindingly obvious to everyone else.

YES !!!

I'd also ask the school how you can help, particularly with reading and helping the parents integrate into the school community.

Another one jumping on to say read The Boy at the Back of the Class with your children. We all learnt from it.

@DazzlePaintedBattlePants

Given that children at our naice middle class village primary racially abused a child in reception, I’m not confident that a minority wouldn’t spout anti immigration, racist nonsense at the child, learnt at their parents’ knee.

I admire the optimism in this thread, but I don’t share it.

That's awful. On optimism, though, I'm not being funny, but maybe that happened precisely BECAUSE it's a 'naice middle class village' (by which I think you may mean very white and rather insular)? Thankfully many areas of the UK are more diverse. Hopefully with that, and increasing awareness of diversity.white privilege/all the rest, this shit will die out.

That's not to say ALL 'naice middle class villages' have people who would racially abuse children, before people jump down my throat to defend their village...

@Tombero

Another one jumping on to say read The Boy at the Back of the Class with your children. We all learnt from it.

I read it before I read it with DS and was blown away by it. Such a brilliant book for adults and children alike

What do you mean by how would we feel?

I’m not sure I understand the purpose of this thread?

@IntermittentParps
Thankfully many areas of the UK are more diverse
I’m not sure “being diverse” automatically makes one place better than another. The UK isn’t better or more enlightened, than, say, Ireland, just because it has a larger proportion of non-white people. The US isnt the best country just because it’s very racially diverse.

I’d feel and treat them in the same way I do for every other new child to join my class. I make them feel welcome. I make them a peg label and drawer label so they know where their stuff goes. I introduce myself to them and check I’m calling them the right thing (nickname, pronunciation…). I find them a kind and helpful partner, who I know will include them in their games at playtime, to look after them for the day.

I work in a very multicultural school in a town centre. We have a huge number of different languages and backgrounds and many of our children have gone through things I could only imagine. I try to be their consistency and their equaliser. All of the children in my class are valued and treated the same by me. I might keep an extra special eye on those I need to but not in a way that they know.

My son's primary class welcomed two refugee children from Syria. Before they arrived, the teachers gave the class some pointers of things that the children could do, or say, or just be aware of, that would help the boys settle in. All good.

On collecting my son that day, his teacher informed me that when they'd said to the kids that it would be helpful to avoid using slang etc, and did they know what that meant, my darling child put his hand up and said

'yes, don't say cunt'

I nearly fell through the floor (the teacher actually did say cunt ), I was absolutely mortified until she told me that he followed up with

'you have to say couldn't...and wouldn't not 'wunt'.'

For context, we are in Yorkshire!

On a serious note, it was handled very well, and the kids and their families settled in nicely.

I'd ask them if they need anything? Kitchenware, toys, bedding etc. I'd help provide what I could and model to my children how we care about other people.

We welcomed a Yemeni refugee mum into our little clique group at school when DD was in primary.

Over the years she has repaid my friendship in ways I can't even describe. Including saving DD from some really worrying bullying.

Actually they are in different classes now and I'm not at the school gates so I might text her.

Thanks for the reminder OP.

A friendly hello and a box of Fox’s biscuits to the parent at pick- up time too. Say welcome and a gesture such as an arm touch goes a long way. Irrespective of language barriers, smiles and sweet food are universal gestures of kindness.

@Needstobeagrownup 😂😂😂😂

Doesnt really matter how we would feel, does it?

Surely you make them welcome like you would any other family?

Really pleased. Poor kids have had one hell of a time and this hopefully signals the beginning of a positive new life.

Welcome them by interacting with them and their parents in exactly the same way as you would any other new families.

(Really hoping this isn’t a cynical post)

Not sure where you live OP but my son’s class at his primary had only 3 white kids whose first language was English (DS was not one of them) so I won’t notice any difference really. Why a strange comment!

*what

Work with refugees.

Just be kind and welcoming. As you would with any other family.

What would you want if you moved to another country? As pps said, help to manage what’s happening at the school, support with homework etc is usually the most useful thing.

There is a series of books called The Breadwinner, I read them with my dd’s, how much it taught them about Afghanistan and the current situation. I highly recommend them for children 9 and above.

Please be just as generous with other refugee and asylum seeker families. Afghan refugees may be most visible at the moment and have been more in the news but there are many others. It means trying I welcome all parents including ones on the outside. It would probably help people that just moved area area in the UK and groups seem already established.

How would I feel?

If I even knew about it I’d feel nothing. Are refugees a new thing at your school? Ours has had refugee children attending for years. Most of the local schools have. It’s not newsworthy, is it?