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i think Im done with Mumsnet

(68 Posts)
Spacemen3 Sun 11-Jan-15 14:57:55

this is my last hope! grin

I know there has been a lot of threads moaning about 'how its not like the good old days'....but its REALLY changed. It really has.

Chat is infested with sexism and racism, and it goes unchallenged. nothing massive and really overtly offensive. But just the vibe/culture...lots of low level stuff

IT was not like this even 1 year ago

do you think? or is it just me?

AnyFucker Sun 11-Jan-15 15:08:15

It's not just you

the thing is though when I do see the sexist/racist/victim blaming suit on here is is almost always challenged

not so in RL

I think I am more passed off with RL at the moment, tbh

AnyFucker Sun 11-Jan-15 15:08:38

shit not suit

Spacemen3 Sun 11-Jan-15 15:17:47

oh really anyfucker

i feel there is more of it. and its less challenged than it was. i think i used to feel really comfortable hon MN. I work in a male dominated envionment, and coming here was like a breath of fresh air

i think my RL has improved and here has worsened! so not really worth logging on to feel more disheartened!

NoArmaniNoPunani Sun 11-Jan-15 15:20:07

The recent victim blaming rape thread really upset me. I do still think there are more of us than them though. I hope so anyway

JeanSeberg Sun 11-Jan-15 15:20:19

I like that comments get pulled up on here. Yet the CE story has flushed a lot of rape apologists out in real life and few people challenge it.

Do you have some examples on here that have gone unchallenged?

AnyFucker Sun 11-Jan-15 15:21:50

Bloody awful typos in my post there blush

oh well, take a break from MN then ?

I wish there were more people in my day to day life that identified with the MN feminists. This place has been my saviour at times. Chat and A IBM less so, granted, but you definitely see a spill over IMO

lyspaere Sun 11-Jan-15 15:23:16

Anyfyckwr is right

AnyFucker Sun 11-Jan-15 15:23:18

yes armani, that is the thread I am thinking of

I think the take home message from it though is the correct one, despite some damaging victim blaming going on

JeanSeberg Sun 11-Jan-15 15:29:09

I've heard so much bs and untruths about the CE case from staff at work, I felt like holding a meeting to educate them on the facts.

I only have 3 female colleagues out of a team of almost 30 and they show no interest in feminist issues.

This place has been so informative and supportive even though I mainly lurk on the feminist boards.

IamTitanium Sun 11-Jan-15 15:34:39

Evil triumphs over good, when good people do nothing.
You can't leave (well I know you can), some people are ignorant and if one person listens and changes their thought process it is worth it.
But I am a 2 faced fucker so don't listen to me, as I just closed down a thread as I could not be arsed at that time to challenge the stupid and racist last post- I will go back to it, but at this time I just thought I can not face it blush

Spacemen3 Sun 11-Jan-15 15:36:05

maybe i will hang out here for a while.

anyfucker her very self and hissy got me through some very dark times on the EA threads (different user name) in Relationships (threads 1 through 6/7...i see they are now up to threda 20ish?!) and I learnt alot about being emotionally healthy/boundaries/ my bloody mother!. Ive learnt loads over the yyears about feminism amongst other stuff. MN has really helped me so much

AnyFucker Sun 11-Jan-15 15:43:05

lys, are you taking the piss out of my typo's? (narrows eyes)

Koalafications Sun 11-Jan-15 15:43:29

I agree NoArmani that thread is really disturbing.

RustyParker Sun 11-Jan-15 15:44:21

I'm a FWR lurker in the main and I'm in awe of the the posters on this section as they beautifully articulate what I so desperately want to say. I think in other parts of the forum, you say one slightly out of place word and everyone jumps on that rather than look at the context where it would make sense and although I know FWR is different, it does put me off posting as if I felt excluded from this part of the forum then my MN experience would be finished too.

It probably sounds oh-so-dramatic but feminism has literally saved an changed my life. With it I would have blindly followed the path that was expected of me and I know I would have had an unhappy life. My life at the moment is far from a bed of roses and it's out of my control (medical and bereavement) but I'm authentic and true to myself.

Maybe take a break space and then come back when you feel up to rejoining the good fight smile flowers If you come back, then I will challenge and support more too - deal??

AnyFucker Sun 11-Jan-15 15:45:11

The feminism boards are a relatively safe space

you get the odd dickhead but they soon get dealt with smile

RustyParker Sun 11-Jan-15 15:46:10

*without it

Anyfuckers typos are rubbing off grin

AnyFucker Sun 11-Jan-15 15:48:16

and by that I mean the goady fuckers who come on here with the blatant aim to wind us up

BitOutOfPractice Sun 11-Jan-15 15:54:05

The obviously goady fuckers are quite amusing though - or rather the response often is. I like watching them get eaten alive

<checks for typos>

YonicSleighdriver Sun 11-Jan-15 15:55:18

Come to the feminist pub, spaceman?

I had to hide the CE threads for a couple if days, I was on 6-7 and I got too depressed to carry on. No shame in that, fight when you can, take a break when you need to.


Spacemen3 Sun 11-Jan-15 15:57:16

totally agree with and relate to your post rusty, particularly;

I'm in awe of the the posters on this section as they beautifully articulate what I so desperately want to say


It probably sounds oh-so-dramatic but feminism has literally saved an changed my life

i keep thiking its not really a very healthy relationship to have with a website. when I was childless, I would have gone out and met friends and talked to them. But finding myself a LP with 2 kids, its harder to find time in RL to seek people out and have these conversations. MN has brought adult companionship and wisdom into my life cheesey fucker grin

i think maybe general-chat has morphed a bit into AIBU. I never have liked AIBU

RustyParker Sun 11-Jan-15 16:06:23

Nah, not cheesy Space I know how you feel. I have a chronic diability and awaiting another major operation and over the years, friends drop off . Other than my poor DH, there aren't too many people to talk about feminism with but I have so much I want to say and want to learn it feel like my head is going to burst. FWR is like a little lifeline where it seems posters know whats in my head. It makes me feel less alone. Now, that's cheesy blush

Yes, the AIBU attitude seems to have invaded other sections. It's tough reading sometimes and I don't feel like being the one to go against the tide. It's hard to put yourself out there, especially when you aren't very confident in rl.

Can't we have some sort of FWR klaxon to alert the rational posters from FWR to other threads. We could have a little badge maybe? grin

IamTitanium Sun 11-Jan-15 16:08:42

There is a thread in AIBU at the moment which is positive re BB smile

Koalafications Sun 11-Jan-15 16:09:42

Yes, it's just the OP's attitude which is depressing in that one Iam

IamTitanium Sun 11-Jan-15 16:21:30

You are right koala, but hopefully the responses will educate her, make her think about her mindset.
There was recently a thread about a lady being scammed for money by a person cleaning her porch, to be absolutely truthful when I read the post I though why did you not just say no and call the police blush, I read the first few posts which were all along the same lines.
Later I was thinking about it and thought I would never have thought that if the outcome had been someone posting the same but had been sexually assaulted. I was rightly ashamed of my thought process!
Every day is a day to learn, challenge what you think etc.

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