Thoughts please - just found the bottom half of a thong bikini in the laundry which DD1 (14) has bought. Took me a while to figure out what it was God knows what the top half looks like ...
DD has developed a conventionally "sexy" body and is keen to show it off - her clothes have got more and more revealing lately. (She also wears very sexy underwear, but that's her business.) I did start out being quite strict about it but then backed off and started letting her make her own choices (except when she put on a cropped strappy low-cut vest top and teenytiny shorts to go to a voluntary work interview - which led to a blazing row ...).
She also posts selfies on social media which are fairly borderline, but not quite inappropriate enough to warrant challenging ...
If I do question her (lack of) clothing, she demands reasons and it's so hard to explain without sending awful judgy messages about female sexuality. I refuse to use words like "tarty", and I don't want her to feel blamed for male responses to her body, but where does that leave me?
So I've let things be for a while and trusted her to make her own choices but this bloody thong has crossed a line and I think the conversation may need to be revived. She's going abroad on a course this summer and I guess she's planning to wear it then, when we're not around.
In principle, I of course believe in women's freedom to wear whatever the hell they choose, but I also worry about the brainwashing effect of porn culture which puts pressure on very young girls to be ultrasexual before they're ready. She of course believes she's immune to all those influences.
Who's had a successful conversation with their DD on this and navigated the topic satisfactorily?
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14yo and thong bikini (and other sexy outfits)
36 replies
lawn · 25/06/2018 11:02
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