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Help - dd struggles with hair washing

25 replies

Dancergirl · 16/05/2017 21:12

She is 14 and has dyspraxia and sensory issues. She has long straight very fine hair which often looks greasy. I don't think she is rinsing properly. I've given her some tips - make sure hair is sopping wet before putting shampoo on, don't use too much shampoo, only rub into your scalp and keep rinsing for ages.

It doesn't make any difference, it still looks dull and greasy and she's really fed up.

Any ideas please? Are there any shampoos she can try that are easier to rinse?

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MrsLettuce · 16/05/2017 21:21

Might she like to have it cut short? It might be much easier for her to handle, but she might hate the idea.

My hair is long, straight and fine. It shows tiniest bit of grease like mad, great fun when my hormones decide to run amok.

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Dancergirl · 16/05/2017 21:23

She had a bob with a fringe when she was about 4 or 5 which looked lovely and made her hair look thicker.

She did have it cut to shoulder length last summer which she regretted and grew it out again.

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MrsLettuce · 16/05/2017 21:26

I was meaning short, short. Anything longer than short wouldn't really help anyway, I don't think.

Might she be applying the conditioner to wrong? Up to the scalp rather than just on the ends?

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Petalbird · 16/05/2017 21:26

I find I am having to comb my conditioner into my hair now that's it's grown longer again (I have very fine hair) otherwise it just looks horrible. Oh and I never put anything but herbal essence cocoont butter in it as it makes it kinda frizzy and light (seems to wash out good too)

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SavoyCabbage · 16/05/2017 21:28

Might it be silicone build up?

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SunshineBelle · 16/05/2017 21:33

OP I have had a friend that had exactly the same thing. Apparently it can be a build up of oil/ change in ph balance.

She used some tea tree shampoo which fixed it in about three days. Give that a go.

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tabulahrasa · 16/05/2017 21:40

Has she tried washing it in the bath rather than the shower? It's much easier to rinse stuff out by ducking your hair under water than it is to make sure you've got all your head with a shower.

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Dancergirl · 16/05/2017 23:22

I don't think she'd go for properly short.

She washed it tonight and I combed it out for her. It's still got a greasy feel to it. I've told her to only put conditioner on the bottom few inches.

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hellokittymania · 16/05/2017 23:40

Dancergirl I have the exact same problem. I didn't realize until I was in my early 20s that you were supposed to massage your scalp and leave the shampoo in and not just put the shampoo on and then rinse it off. I still have trouble with my hair though and as I can't see it, sometimes I have to ask other people how it looks. I can feel it when it gets very greasy and I find that normal shampoos that you find in the supermarket are much harder to rinse . I try and find specialty shampoos for greasy hair or other specialty samples for fine hair. Johnson and Johnson three in one was OK as well.

This is the one I have now. I have also tried using dry shampoo and just couldn't get the hang of how to use it.

Also, when her hair is clean, it squeaks when you put your hand through it. This was a help Ful guideline for me to understand how it was clean. Would she be willing to clean it over the sink and you stand by and watch? This is how I learned to do it a bit better

Also although those shampoos from the body shop smell really nice and don't have as much lather, I also found it very difficult to use them. The shampoo that is in the picture was 8 pounds per bottle But has been one of the better shampoos.

Help - dd struggles with hair washing
Help - dd struggles with hair washing
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hellokittymania · 16/05/2017 23:45

Dancer. I have had shorthair and had the exact same problem. It doesn't matter how short or how long my hair is, although if my hair is too long it falls out much more easily because my hair is very fine.

Another thing I sometimes do is wash it and shampoo it twice. I find that after the first time I rinse the shampoo out my hair is soaking wet and I can put the second coat of shampoo on and rub it in more easily.

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Fakenameforthis · 16/05/2017 23:46

Have you said to her general stuff "don't use too much shampoo, put conditioner at the bottom" etc or have you said "use shampoo that is about 10p big (or whatever) and then let her take a 10p into the shower to see. Or draw a shape on her hand to fill with shampoo. The same with conditioner - have you for her to feel where she needs to put it up to? Can she take a timer in with her so she knows how long to comb it through for or to spend rinsing it?

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LonnyVonnyWilsonFrickett · 17/05/2017 00:11

I'm a bit obsessed with low shampoo at the moment but actually thinking about it, I wonder if it would help your DD? It's basically shampoo with the consistency of conditioner. So you rub it into wet hair, wait a bit, then rinse it out. That seems to me to have much fewer steps than the traditional wash/condition?

Elvive do one which isn't too dear - worth a try?

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hellokittymania · 17/05/2017 00:17

Lonny is low shampoo similar to the thing they sell at the body shop? If you go to boots, do you just ask for low shampoo? I have tried buying different shampoos from boots and other places but most don't work on my hair. Even the shampoos for a fine hair that falls out didn't work.

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MrsJayy · 17/05/2017 00:25

19yrcold is dyspraxic she struggled with hair washing too, she is better now anyway get her to not use conditioner and just a blob of shampoo rinse then another blob then rinse is how i helped dd when she was struggiling.

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MrsJayy · 17/05/2017 00:26

Loreal (sp) were advertising low shampoo

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Poppins2016 · 17/05/2017 00:38

I have the same hair type and find that with even the best rinsing, trace amounts of conditioner weigh my hair down. My hair has improved since I found this 'reverse' system. It's often on offer in Boots or supermarkets:

www.tresemme.com/uk/products/conditioner/beauty-full-volume-reverse-system-pre-wash-conditioner-.html

If I don't use the 'reverse' system, I wash my hair as follows:
1 Shampoo
2 Conditioner
3 Rinse
4 Apply a pea sized blob of shampoo to scalp only
5 Rinse thoroughly

Washing every other day (to stop over production of natural oils) really helps with the lankness, plus I use volumising dry shampoo on the inbetween days. Go easy on using the hair dryer near the roots, too (I find this irritates the skin and makes my hair greaser).

My final tip is to ensure your daughter is using enough shampoo and to shampoo twice if necessary. If the oils that weigh down the hair aren't washed away properly in the first place, no amount of rinsing is going
to help.

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imjessie · 17/05/2017 07:47

Get her to put on a swimsuit And you wash it for her properly once a week ? Either that or do it under a really powerful shower . My dd is 13 no extra needs And she can't be bothered to rinse her hair properly either 🙄... it's much easier in a power shower though .

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MeadowHay · 17/05/2017 15:40

I had this problem as a teenager too (autistic with sensory and coordination difficulties) but luckily my hair is very thick and I never had it much longer than shoulder length. I did find it much easier to deal with when I got it cut shorter into a bob and then eventually even shorter into a pixie. Then as I got older I did more research myself and I can manage it fine now really although the longest I've ever had it was like a couple of inches past my boobs when I was growing it for my wedding.

I agree maybe if you show her how to do it properly whilst shes in swimming costume or something that could help. I can't learn things by people telling me how to do things, and not even when they are showing me unless it's very slow, step-by-step and precise, and I need to often have them manipulate my hands into the right movements before I can learn. Perhaps your DD is like this too and that could really help.

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Dancergirl · 17/05/2017 20:38

Thank you all, some great tips.

I did wonder if the grease is due to build up savoy In my day there was a shampoo called Neutrogena which claimed to remove build up, I don't know if you can still get it.

I am happy to wash it for her but I don't think it will do her self-esteem much good if it's on a regular basis. She's already down on herself about stuff she can't do.

I will look out for some of the shampoos recommended.

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M5tothesouthwest · 17/05/2017 22:43

Get her to try conditioner first, rinse, then shampoo. Really! It's a thing and I've found it's made a huge difference to my long, fine hair.

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Yika · 17/05/2017 22:50

Dilute some white vinegar in a jug of water for the final rinse - will clear residue and leave hair soft.

I've got into low shampoo following a tip on MN and it leaves my hair very soft and shiny.

Might just be hormones though.

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Kimonolady · 17/05/2017 23:41

2 suggestions:
Firstly, I would double check with her that she's only applying conditioner to the bottom 2inches of the strand of hair. I had a friend at school who had pretty constantly greasy hair. I remember seeing her again aged 19 and telling her her hair looked amazing, really healthy and the best I'd seen it - she said, yeah, I've started only applying conditioner to the ends. Apparently all that time she'd been putting it all over her head like shampoo! No-one had told her differently, so she just assumed.
Secondly - this might sound a bit odd, but have you considered highlights for your DD? Obviously depends on her current colour, what would suit her, whether she would like it, etc. But bleach naturally dries out hair, and if you tend to greasy hair, that can help a lot. I certainly found when I got them that I could go a day or two longer without washes than I had before.

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firsttimer12345 · 17/05/2017 23:47

I get really greasy hair when I'm really stressed. I mix bicarbonate of soda with my shampoo and it strips all the grime off it. Sometimes I have to repeat it for a few days but seems to work well!

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Dancergirl · 18/05/2017 23:58

If she does the conditioner before shampoo, should she still only condition the ends?

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Kimonolady · 19/05/2017 00:32

I've had another thought - dry shampoo? Could be useful as a sort of "top up." Really good at getting rid of greasy roots.

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