Why has my hair started splitting off...and is it true that some types of hair cannot be grown long?

[Gotbills2pay]

After a long break dyeing it, I started having highlights again last year. The hairdresser used bleach though - it looked okay the first two times (January and a top up in March) but the third time I had my roots done it was left looking green. FYI I have mid brown hair with 10% grey (the grey is not really an issue tbh) which is fine but has a wave so it looks thicker than it is, it goes down just below my shoulders...
Anyway I left it for a few months and another hairdresser gave me a t-section with tinted highlights (caramel) which gave me a nice ombre look, I've been using Aveda cammomile conditioner to tone down the green. Anyway i went back to the hairdresser who did the t section and she noticed my hair is splitting at the back - just above where the bleached highlights are growing out. I'm a bit gutted as I condition and look after my hair (putting it in clips and not elastics and even barely using my Ghds). I also breastfed until a year ago and I have been under stress with eczema and occasionally use steroid cream on the nape of my neck. However the eczema was work related and is going away as I'm changing jobs. The hairdresser told me I would never be able to grow my hair long and said I needed 3 inches off the ends to make it one length; my hair is cut one length which is why the breakage looks so bad.
Ladies who know about hair advice please should I a) have it cut off b) just dye it brown (which drains me - the golden highlights looks better) or give up on my hair and tie it back forever.?

[Sunloving01]

I don't know why the hairdresser has said your hair will never be long. Rubbish. Everyone has a terminal length but it is a EXTREMELY rare for anyone's to be shorter than waist.

I would either let her trim 3 inches off and stick it up, oil it every day with almond oil, use a deep, moisturising conditioner once or twice a week (depending on how many times you wash it) use only your fingers and a wide tooth comb to detangle when wet and try and grow those 3 inches back within the next 6-8 months.

OR (what I would do) Put aside a couple of hours at the weekend, section my hair, go through each section under natural light (by a window in daylight) and cut off every split end/ breakage I see. Once I'd gone through all the sections, I'd then trim myself about half an inch to an inch off the ends. Part your hair at the back and bring both forward over your shoulders and do it that way, or get a friend/ DP to trim half an inch off your hemline from the back.

I would then wash and deep condition it, oil it and I guarantee your hair will feel better.

I would then, over the next few months S&D (search and destroy = going through and snipping off all of the split ends/ breakages individually) to gradually trim out the damage in your hair so that you can still continue to grow it.

No way would I let a hairdresser cut 3 inches off if I wanted to grow it.

Oh and when you have it highlighted, tell them to only do the roots and not the lengths/ ends.

[Gotbills2pay]

Thanks sun looking at it it's more wispy than split ended. My mum can trim my hair - she's done it in the past. However I need it blow dried and styled for a do so I may just get the hairdresser to take off an inch max (that will grow back in two months) I think it's this bleached highlights that must have wrecked it and yes she only highlighted my roots.

[Jeezimacasalinga]

Try using Olaplex to protect and even repair your hair when you're having highlights - it's more expensive but makes such a difference.

[Mammatron]

You mentioned baby/ breastfeeding, could the 'breakage' be the hair you shedded after pregnancy growing back?

[Gotbills2pay]

Can I buy Olaplex in Boots Jeezima? Mammatron I stopped feeding my daughter 18 months ago but I think going back to full time work has really stressed me, I also exercise a lot - so I'm thinking I might need to look at my diet...

[Ellieboolou27]

My hair hardly grows had a terrible haircut last year, think pudding bowl style bob and it will be a year in April and not even touching shoulders yet, my hair is so fine, it breaks before it grows. I get it trimmed every 10-12 weeks and use all the repairs treatments, take multi vitamins etc but still got a bowl cut bob

[Koalafications]

I'm in the same position OP. Watching with interest.

I stopped breastfeeding about about 16 months ago and my hair is wrecked! I condition, I slap on coconut oil, I only wash it every few days - it's still hideous!

[Floisme]

Once my hair gets to my shoulders, it just grows sideways. I've never got it past that point and gave up trying years ago.

[cathyandclare]

Sorry, piling on in, but also in need! Which Olapex is the best? Is it the Number 3?

[Trills]

If your hair has a maximum length it will be down to how long each hair follicle grows for before dropping out. Not down to breakage.

Average hair grows about half an inch a month, or six inches in a year. If your hair's natural cycle is about 4 years, your hair's maximum length would be 2 feet.

Some people have longer or shorter cycles. Some people's hair grows slower or faster.

As you get near to the maximum length, you'll notice that the hair is much thinner at the end, because not many hairs have reached that far (they don't all reliably drop out when they reach 4 years/2 feet, there will be some that make it over and some that drop before).

[Laiste]

I was thinking about this thread this morning when i was drying my hair and trying not to pull it too much and i had a thought:

Apx 4 years ago i spent 18 months with hair extensions. I had them redone every ... 5 or 6 weeks IIRC ... and in all those months i never saw my hair without the extensions and assumed that when they came out for good my hair would be it's usual Just Past Shoulders And Wont Grow Any Longer Length.

Not so! When i'd got fed up with the extensions, got them taken out and looked in the mirror my hair was so long! Way past where i'd ever got it too in the past. I know it sounds mad that i hadn't realised this or that it hadn't come up in convo with the hairdresser, but my 18'' extensions had not been adding any actual length for quite a while.

My theory used to be that the extensions had somehow gently pulled the hair longer than it naturally would have come out Yes. Mental idea i know. Now having read this thread about splitting and breakage ect i'ts dawned on me it was probably because when you have extensions you have to treat your hair and scalp VERY gently. No pulling or harsh brushing from the top to bottom. Maybe that's why my hair grew so well. It was being treated super gently.

[Laiste]

I guess i should add that after the extension out time i had a baby (hair was lovely and long) and then 18 months ago i bleached and ruined it :( It's a lovely colour and is recovering now but i'm back to square one with length

[Chocolateteabag]

OP - maybe it's a stress related thing - have you noticed more hair than normal coming out when you wash or brush it? I'm not talking in a patchy alopecia type way but just all over blocking the plughole type loss?

I had flu/pneumonia/bad infection last Jan and 3 months later started losing a lot of hair. I was told this was v normal after a traumatic experience. Childbirth or a stressful period can cause the same effect.

I had really thin weird looking hair from July through to Oct/Nov. My hair is now growing back but is now curly (but in the annoying horrid frizzy way). I have found Philip Kinglsey Elasticizer treatments really help and also the keratin treatments (get mine off amazon though)

It sucks though - I find helps the most

[Gotbills2pay]

Right okay - my hair grows quite fast, but normally starts to slow down as it gets further down my shoulders. I think the bleached highlights were too much for it - to think I had them done in January then March then June! Being stressed probably hasn't helped. I reckon reading everyone's posts it was several things combined. So my plan - go back to that hairdresser (her highlights were very good) and get her to chop off 1 inch every 8 weeks, my hair will not 'grow' but it won't get any shorter. If I do this until the summer (when my hair grows like crazy) might just mean I don't have to cut it all off. Also - stick with the tinted highlights no more bleach, the tint does help thicken my hair and give it some life! Where can I buy Olaplex - notice Schwartzkopf are doing something with a similar name in Boots...

[HowardMoonsJazzTrumpet]

olaplex 3

Don't buy off ebay/Amazon. Probably fakes.

No3 is the at home follow up treatment you use after having steps 1 & 2 at an olaplex salon. I think 3 works to a point as a standalone.

[HowardMoonsJazzTrumpet]

I think very long hair rarely looks good. It sort of hangs there, dragging the face down in long curtains with raggedy ends. It's apparent only merit being extraordinary length.

[HowardMoonsJazzTrumpet]

Gah, sorry for rogue apostrophe.

[Gotbills2pay]

I don't want mine super long - just a couple of inches longer than it is now. However unless you have a hairdresser on hand to blow dry it - or you have the kind of super curly hair which looks perfectly undone when it's long (like my DD does) then yes you are right Howards

[Gotbills2pay]

By the way I had four inches cut off. I don't like it, it is a bit healthier but there are still split bits. I'm wondering if sticking on a light brown wash might help the condition, it has obviously broken off around the bits that were bleached. I'm taking the Pregnacare New Mum vitamins (which have silica in them as well as a multi vitamin). I'm just going to clip it up (not in an elastic band) for the next six months till it grows back. I don't think it will need a trim - there are no split ends just shorter bits - for a while now. So long as I don't dye it?