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The Big Choice: the State school or the private one - are we thinking with our wallets??

(204 Posts)
scampadoodle Fri 01-Mar-13 13:19:24

Ok, just to add to all the other threads like this today.

DS1 got into the private school he/we liked, but no scholarship. We will also almost certainly have a place at the local state school.

PS is lovely, not super-hot house, but high-achieving. Fees are a lot though & would have an impact on our family life (and we'd really feel it if DC2 went private too). It's about 45 mins, an hour journey each way. He would probably enjoy it there & hopefully it would polish him off a bit. I'm slightly worried that it leans more towards humanities than sciences (not good for DS1) BUT I could be wrong about this as it was just an impression I got on Open Day.

SS is great. Streaming. Latin. It has a very mixed intake but those who do well, do well IYSWIM. It's only been good for 2-3 years though, before that it was awful. If he knuckled down DS1 would do well (that is a big 'if' BTW). I do like the idea of sticking within the local community though, & we could afford tutoring if we felt he needed topping-up.

But are we just being stingy at not taking up the opportunity for the private school? The thought of not having to worry abut school fees is very very tempting...

naranji Fri 15-Mar-13 11:36:04

I HATE cookery or home economics or whatever its called - total waste of time IMO, it is perfectly poissible to learn to cook at home or, heavens above, when you leave home and have to fend for yourself as I did. We have a lovely cookery teacher and she seems very good but I, and dd, still resent the fact that dd has no choice over doing it. Ditto IT.

slipshodsibyl Sat 09-Mar-13 10:36:15

Sorry typing error

slipshodsibyl Sat 09-Mar-13 10:35:19

it's European social democracy which is causing us to fall behind

Do you have any thoughts about possible solutions Bos

happygardening Fri 08-Mar-13 22:49:55

Even though I cook reasonably well I'd still like my DS to learn basic cooking skills at school. I have gone through my whole life unable to put up a shelf and frankly dont see why he needs to be able to do this but can wire up a plug at a pinch and can not only change a wheel on a car I doubt few can change the tyre as this requires specialist equipment I can also do the oil water check the brake pads air filter oil filter and much to the surprise of the RAC man check and correctly change the fuses oh and let's not forget the essential for all clapped out car drivers correctly jump it! I'm an expert at basic car first aid!!
I think all children before they leave school should undertake a basic child protection course (level 1) because as a society we have a moral requirement to protect children so therefore we all need to know what to look out for and what do to if we're concerned.
Again enthusiastic parents/teachers/local do gooders could teach many of these skills I don't see that money is necessarily required.

Bonsoir Fri 08-Mar-13 21:01:48

As for putting up shelves or changing a tyre versus Physics - DP is unbelievably useless at manual labour (fortunately my father can show a better example) despite impressive muscles that ought to shame him into at least trying, but is redeeming lay gifted at Physics and Maths. What you outsource really just depends on your own weaknesses!

Copthallresident Fri 08-Mar-13 20:58:41

wordfactory You have not known the joy of having a child who has done RMT in the household, I actually can put a bookshelf up, but not like they can, and as for changing lightbulbs, whatever the electrical challenge I can leave it to them.

Bonsoir Fri 08-Mar-13 20:56:29

I send my DD on courses where she learns practical things - sure, she does so at home and with my parents, but there's always someone who can go beyond our range of skills. Plus learning languages - of which I have no doubt she will do a great deal - is very productively combined with sewing, cooking etc.

wordfactory Fri 08-Mar-13 20:48:33

Thing is, I can teach my DC to cook and put up shelvesv and change a tyre but physics and German, not so much.

It's not that I mind them learning practical skills but if there's a choice to be made, I'd rather they learned practical stuff at home.

happygardening Fri 08-Mar-13 17:11:55

"I am always amused that it's other people's children that most people think would benefit from practical, hands on subjects!"
I be happy for my DS too learn some practical skills.

"Philosophy is available at many state schools- lots of kids do A level philosophy."
Why do it A level wouldn't it be more interesting just to do any of these things just for the sake of it. This is one of the problems with education in this country its always has to be attached to exams the quickest way to put a child off IMO.

seeker Fri 08-Mar-13 16:27:56


racingheart Fri 08-Mar-13 16:25:34

Feud-ian is a good Freudian slip too Seeker. Sigmund would be proud.

Bonsoir Fri 08-Mar-13 16:14:33

It's European social democracy that is causing us to fall behind, seeker.

seeker Fri 08-Mar-13 16:06:30

"You are an adult and free to renounce the values inculcated in your childhood."

Why would I want to? The mean spirited, looking after number one mindset currently driving our national identity isn't getting us anywhere very much, is it?

wordfactory Fri 08-Mar-13 15:59:10

Ah seeker I'm currently writing a novel where the Aberfan disaster plays a prominent part...

The thing is most state schools really aren't that bad, are they?

And even if we private school parents did use our local schools, whose to say that we should import our educational values? Who says we're right? It's clear from MN that a lot of folks just don't want it...and who am I to say they're wrong?

Bonsoir Fri 08-Mar-13 15:53:13

You are an adult and free to renounce the values inculcated in your childhood.

seeker Fri 08-Mar-13 15:50:17

I'm a lost cause, I'm afraid- this is the sort of stuff I was brought up on!

wordfactory Fri 08-Mar-13 15:48:10

I'm none too keen on that either seeker to be honest.

But it's a balance. And my DC's eductaion wins out.

Bonsoir Fri 08-Mar-13 15:45:56

You might find it distasteful, seeker, but the alternatives are so much worse.

seeker Fri 08-Mar-13 15:40:26

I can see the argument for being allowed to buy the education you want, obviously. How about you can do it, but politicians can't? I just fundamentally dislike the way education divides the nation, and perpetuates privilege.

wordfactory Fri 08-Mar-13 15:35:14

pooka that's grand you have such a great choice. How very nice for you...doesn't much help kids in neck of the woods though.

Unless you have cash. Which I do. So...

seeker Fri 08-Mar-13 15:32:53

Actually, it was obviously a Feudian spelling mistake -trad-dentine, geddit?

seeker Fri 08-Mar-13 15:31:30


I can spell, honest. After all, I did Latingrin. No idea where that came from!

RussiansOnTheSpree Fri 08-Mar-13 15:16:14

But we don't know anyone who would pass 6. sad Tr*I*dentine.

As an aside - I always thought the Merricks were being a bit silly. Never got why they were all so hot under the collar. then they changed some of the words again last year, new translation blah blah just a rouse to sell new missals I reckon. But it's meant getting new hymn books too and all the new hymn books have wrong hymns in them. And I am going all Merrick so I am. All 'if it was good enough for my mum....' grin

seeker Fri 08-Mar-13 15:07:41

6. How to be nice to your sisters, however unappealing. 7. Basic feminism. 8. A working knowledge of the Tradentine Mass and the Manichaean heresy.

RussiansOnTheSpree Fri 08-Mar-13 15:04:47

Nit - things that should be compulsory: 1. Latin. 2. Lord Peter Whimsey. 3. How they brought the good news from Ghent to Aix 4. How to spot a spy 5. Gondal.

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