I have NC for this as I'm embarrassed and will probably sound like an idiot...
The last few years of my 15 year marriage have been rather unhappy. I gave up my career to have children and be mainly a SAHM with a boring part time job. Had PND and then steadily sank into a downward spiral of depression and comfort eating. Completely forgot who I was and totally lost my mojo. Fat, frumpy, mush brain etc...
Meanwhile my DH had an on/off affair and we nearly split up twice.
We are supposed to be having a final attempt at patching up our marriage up. He's been seeing a therapist (lots of issues) and trying really hard. He's become 'Super DH'. But I find it irritating having to constantly pat him on the back for trying so hard. I feel he should have been more sympathetic towards me in the first place and recognised I needed support when I was unwell... Instead he just kept buggering of for evenings out with OW.
I had a bit of a lightbulb moment several months ago when a lovely man in a social situation paid me some attention. We just chatted and, bearing in mind I was overweight at the time, he said he thought I looked lovely and had really enjoyed talking to me.
Since then we have stayed in touch via social networking and seen each other two more times - in company with my DH present.
I have stopped feeling depressed and (almost effortlessly) lost weight. Sorted out my clothes, hair, makeup etc and feeling much more positive. Also applying for jobs.
Our exchanges have been mainly harmless discussions about cake recipes and music, exchanging amusing posts etc. But he's been such a boost to my confidence.
Recently he's started sending direct messages more often and signing off with a X. We are supposed to be meeting up in a couple of weeks (a social occasion with DH present).
I'm finding myself thinking about him more and more. Holding back and not reciprocating the x. But I'd really like to meet up with him for lunch and a proper chat. Scared... because I so would!
Talk some sense into me!
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Relationships
Someone talk some sense into me!
ILoveLeonard · 26/11/2014 16:14
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