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Is this behaviour a bit weird and inappropriate or am I just a total biatch?

(64 Posts)
MrsFlittersnoop Thu 25-Aug-11 15:09:41

DH gets terribly excited and slightly hysterical about everyday stuff.

Example -
DH: "I've just downloaded every single episode of "On the Buses"! <insert random title of any crap ancient sitcom>! EVERY SINGLE EPISODE!! Isn't that just amazing? That's incredible isn't it? How amazing is that?

MrsF: That's nice.

DH: We can watch them all tonight if you like!! Wouldn't you like that? We can have some tea and those biscuits we bought!!

MRsF: Errm, well, we'll see - I might have other things to do....

DH: Oh! I see! That's great isn't it! I just thought we might have a lovely evening cuddled up on the sofa together and you're not interested. Well thanks. I know where I stand then don't I?

I don't fake the same level of enthusiasm he goes into a terrible huffy sulk and can turn quite nasty. At best, I get accused of having so sense of humour/romance/sensitivity and at worst, of displaying hostility and contempt towards him. I confess I do find this behaviour needy, attention seeking and deeply irritating and sometimes find it hard to hide my annoyance. I just can't stand all the squealing like a girl and jumping up and down about the purchase of a packet of bourbon biscuits or watching bad 70's TV. Unfortunately his behaviour is now also being picked up on and criticised by my 15 year old DS, who has ASD and can be extremely blunt.

I passed my driving theory test today. I am, as you might imagine, rather pleased with myself, but it really wasn't very hard. Ever since I got home DH has been running into the room squealing, grabbing and squeezing me (very roughly) trying to pick me up (I am a 14 stone 6-footer hmm) and shouting "You've passed! You've passed! at the top of his voice. I had to ask him to chill our please, and now he is acting very offended and hurt.

Am I a total bitch? I feel guilty (again) for not matching his mood-swings. It's nice that he is so pleased for me, but honestly.


tethersend Thu 25-Aug-11 15:11:29

Sorry, all I got from that was: You can download all the episodes of 'On The Buses'! shock Where from?

Can he get Man About The House?

TheOriginalDesperateHousewife Thu 25-Aug-11 15:11:40

Well, I wouldn't be with him in the first place, as he sounds like a right pain.

Catsmamma Thu 25-Aug-11 15:12:52

is this a new thing, or is it just now getting on your tits??

it does sound wearing!

congrats on the theory test though! <brisk unfussy congratulatory handshake>

Spero Thu 25-Aug-11 15:13:30

It would drive me mad.

Has he always been like this?

Catsmamma Thu 25-Aug-11 15:13:43

introduces tethersend to Mr F

ChitChattingaway Thu 25-Aug-11 15:16:02

Sounds a bit manic to me. Has he always been prone to this sort of behaviour?

caramelwaffle Thu 25-Aug-11 15:16:47

I'm with tethersend - download them? From where?!

Aside from that, his behaviour sounds like that of a person currently consuming chemical drugs...or a person in the throes of a manic episode.

HamstersDontSwim Thu 25-Aug-11 15:17:04

He sounds really camp.

SayItLoud Thu 25-Aug-11 15:17:52

He is weird and inappropriate, and you are not a biatch. I couldn't stand it, and I think the more he did it the more I would get irritated with him each time.

paddypoopants Thu 25-Aug-11 15:19:11

If he could send some of his enthusiasm the way of my dh I'd be ever so grateful. My dh is a grumpy sod and a packet of bourbons on the sofa sounds like a good deal to me. Are you sure he's not been sniffing the air fresheners when you've been out.

PeppermintPasty Thu 25-Aug-11 15:20:22

He does sound a bit bonkers. Medication? Mind you, you do sound a bit of a grump smile

Seriously, I was with him until the high pitched squealing and grabbing, as I'm often the one suggesting to my OH that we both sit down together to just chill out and watch something as all he wants to do is tinker in his effing shed most of the time.

I would prefer Robin's Nest however.

tethersend Thu 25-Aug-11 15:20:39

I 'ate you, Butler

madeupme Thu 25-Aug-11 15:21:59

Could he be overcompensating to try and get a response out of you. I can get a bit like this trying to jolly some enthusiasm out of DH if he has been acting down and withdrawn (history of depression).

ShatnersBassoon Thu 25-Aug-11 15:22:04

He'd really get on my nerves. People who get excited over not very much are so tiring.

He must know you're not a squealing, hand flapping type. Has he always been like this? Did you used to be as camp exuberant as him?

MrsFlittersnoop Thu 25-Aug-11 15:22:17

Tethers, I have no idea! DH works in IT and 'tis all akin to Magic for me. I can ask him. But he will spend the rest of the day EXPLAINING it to me!

DH is not like this all the time. Or even a lot of the time. But after 10 years together I have not found a coping strategy. And now DS has started taking the piss too criticising him he feels really ganged up on and misunderstood.

I have tried ignoring said behaviour, extracting the urine, reacting with deadpan literalism, being even more over the top and hysterical than he is being, and just pretending I don't understand what he is going on about. Nothing seems to work.

KatieMiddleton Thu 25-Aug-11 15:24:24

I'm assuming you knew what he was like when you met him? In which case I would use the same tactics as one might for an over-excited puppy or get him to download back-to-back episodes of Columbo and the Midsommer Murders while I went off to get the duvet and make the tea to go with those biscuits.

Of course if this is new I'd take him down to the GP. He might have some sort of chemical imbalance or something <also watches a lot of medical dramas emoticon>

ComeWhineWithMe Thu 25-Aug-11 15:25:20

Ok, I thought people were lying when they said they almost choked on their drink when reading a comment, but I read Tethers comment while taking a mouthful of tea and although it didn't go actoss the laptop it was spurted back into the cup. grin

didyouseewhatshedid Thu 25-Aug-11 15:27:15

That bloke on On the Buses must have been the sleaziest sleazeball ever. The tall one.

MrsFlittersnoop Thu 25-Aug-11 15:28:25

Medication - no. Illegal recreationals - no. Is complete lightweight in that regard. Manic episode? Well, he has had similar in the past. But that was REALLY scary and out-of-control stuff, and I keep a close eye out for similar behaviour.

His behaviour isn't quite as camp as it sounds -he is I suppose a naturally hyper person. Fits a lot of the symptoms of Adult ADHD. It is just wearing me down at the moment. Can't wait to go back to Uni next month!

GypsyMoth Thu 25-Aug-11 15:31:54


Am I the only one who thinks he sounds lovely!! In fact, I'm a bit like this sometimes as well.

cyb Thu 25-Aug-11 15:35:19

Dont know about your H but tethers makes me laugh REGULARLY

Takitezee Thu 25-Aug-11 15:35:39

He does sound really camp. I imagine him running around flapping his fands about.

I've no idea what you can do about it but I would hate it and feel for any 15 year old that has to deal with that sort of thing. You're not being a bitch.

Takitezee Thu 25-Aug-11 15:35:54

Fands! Perhaps even hands.

toddlerama Thu 25-Aug-11 15:42:37

Sounds like one of my uncles. Not camp at all. Totally gets on my tits. I actually hide from him after a couple of hours at a family gathering blush

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