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Pregnancy

Positivity, please.

60 replies

MrsF90 · 20/02/2019 14:38

I am looking for some positivity!
After a whirlwind surprise of falling pregnant in our first month of TTC (I’m about 5weeks currently), I am now worried this is all too good to be true. Most posts I read on here are about early scans and everyone worrying. What I need is some positivity! The fear of miscarriage keeps me awake at night (as I suffer from health anxiety) and I’m trying to calm myself with the knowledge that 75% of babies are NOT miscarried.
Any one else feeling the same way?

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Onlyinanemergency · 20/02/2019 15:00

I feel the same. I have Health Anxiety too, after some complications just before the birth of DS and we also got pregnant surprisingly quickly this time. I'm so anxious I can hardly think about anything else. I wish I had some advice but at least I can tell you I understand!

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MrsF90 · 20/02/2019 15:17

That must be stressful having had a worrying experience last time. This is our first but DH was diagnosed with cancer just before our wedding so now I always worry about anything health-related! (He’s absolutely fine now!)
I think we need to find our positive pants from somewhere otherwise it will be a long 35 weeks....

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BillyAndTheSillies · 20/02/2019 15:21

I'm with you on the positivity! This is DC2 (I'm 6w3d) and in my last pregnancy, DH banned me from any forums in the first trimester because of the doom and gloom.
It's hard to stay positive because of the unknown but this time round, I've been nauseous, horrendously sore boobs and tired beyond belief - all good signs. By this point last time I'd had multiple spotting and loads of early scans and I should be relieved that this is all going well but I can't keep calm.
I've got an early scan booked in just under 2 weeks time for the sake of my own sanity. And trying to keep calm!

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TheOrangeOwl · 20/02/2019 15:21

Positivity:

I conceived my baby first try. Here's today:

Positivity, please.
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BendingSpoons · 20/02/2019 15:28

I am currently feeding DS who is 3 days old. He was conceived first month of trying, as was his big sister. Pregnancies were reasonably straightforward medically. (Plenty of sickness and other aches, pains etc but nothing to cause a problem to the baby.) More people are going to post when they are worried than when all is ticking along fine. Congratulations and good luck everyone.

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MrsF90 · 20/02/2019 15:36

BendingSpoons that is just what I needed. And congratulations on your new addition!! Xx

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Bluebell9 · 20/02/2019 15:40

I'll join you too. I'm only 3+6 and don't feel like I can relax or get excited about being pregnant yet. I'm having lots of symptoms, the reason I tested so early, which I'm taking to be a good thing.
I just keep telling myself that every sucessful pregnancy had to get past week 4, 5, 6 etc so there is no reason that ours won't all go on to be healthy.

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Onlyinanemergency · 20/02/2019 15:43

I did the same as you, Bluebell, and tested really early. I've been doing a test every day since, terrified that the line will get fainter. I'm not going to do any more tests though - I'm just making my anxiety worse.

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MrsF90 · 20/02/2019 15:51

Bluebell9 that’s really good advice!

Onlyinanemergency I had one negative on the Monday. One positive on the Thursday and another on the Friday. Then I had to tell myself to stop. Well know if something has changed, surely? Xx

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Onlyinanemergency · 20/02/2019 16:08

BendingSpoons, you are right: most people are posting because they are worried or have a problem. I need to keep that in mind.

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Mrsmummy90 · 20/02/2019 17:54

I was absolutely terrified with my first! Was constantly checking for blood any time that I wiped, was always calling my midwife and had 2 reassurance scans before my 12 weeks scan even came around.
I was so stressed throughout the pregnancy that I didn't have time to enjoy it.

I'm pregnant again and this time I've made a conscience effort to relax and I'm loving it! Nearly 18 weeks and have only had one scan lol.
I hope it all goes well for you xx

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Megan2018 · 20/02/2019 18:04

I have found it very stressful, but partly because DH and I are older so time not on our side to try again and the miscarriage stats are actually pretty appalling past 40.
But we have got as far as our NIPT scan today (10 +2) so anxiety easing a bit and I am determined to be positive once we get the results. We will also get the sex which will make it real.
The MMC is what was freaking me out, I know statistically it isn’t common but every other poster on here has had one, so I went in today an emotional wreck. They had to pause the scan as I was sobbing so hard with relief Blush.

I also think I will feel better once we tell everyone, trying to keep my shit together with my team at work and friends has been so tough and lonely.

Good luck! It is a rollercoaster not helped by pregnancy hormones which make me very irritations at times!

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Megan2018 · 20/02/2019 18:05

*irrational! Bloody phone

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Amelia910 · 20/02/2019 18:24

This is my first ever pregnancy and I’m 20 weeks now :)

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bakebakebake · 20/02/2019 18:26

I have 3 children and i worried every single time until i felt them move (21wks, 20wks then 14wks). I think it's fairly normal to worry.

Congratulations!

My second was conceived first time we had sex after coming off the pill (she was very much unplanned - i was swapping contraception!) and she is 5 now!

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MrsF90 · 20/02/2019 19:53

Thank you all for the positivity. I do feel we need more of this sometimes (although I appreciate we need to respect other stories too)
TheOrangeOwl your photo only just appeared for me. How gorgeous!
Congratulations everyone on your little bundles, however far along you are! Xx

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Bluebell9 · 20/02/2019 20:10

It's nice to chat to people who are at a similar stage. Hopefully we can keep each other postive.

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hammeringinmyhead · 20/02/2019 20:22

Good luck ladies. I have had one pregnancy and he is four months old, currently breastfeeding before I put him down in the cot.

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Justus22 · 20/02/2019 22:04

I've conceived against the odds with all 4 of ours and so my husband and I together seem to be very fertile. I had my first at 23 and this is my 4th and I'll be 34 when she's born and despite a lot of ups and downs in each pregnancy they've all been very healthy and I've never suffered a MC yet the older I've got the more aware I have become of others experiences. Not many talk about the time it all went to plan so I think the terrible stories do stick with you despite your practical thinking. I keep coming back to statistically being more likely for everything to be fine and trying to hold on to that, it's got easier with the second scan being good so hang on in there. It's totally normal to worry, I hope you're OK. X

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HJWT · 20/02/2019 22:09

Hi @MrsF90 we conceived our daughter first try had a couple of 'scares' but she was just trying to catch our attention as she is a little rascal now at 2.5 years 😄 and we conceived this baby on our 2nd try I'm only 4+3 iv had an early scan but reality is, if your not in pain or have any spotting baby will be cooking nicely ! Try & enjoy your pregnancy it will soon be over and you will be up all night with a baby 😴 xxx

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Froglette16 · 20/02/2019 22:14

My first was much wanted but unexpected as we’d been trying for many years. I had 1 blood test to do before IVF would start. I got the forms, was going to do the test ASAP but started to feel queasy. Took a pound store test and it was positive. The gp sent me for a reassurance ultrasound at 5 +6. Heartbeat already there. DC is 5.5 yrs now. I wish you all the best but anxiety won’t help. Ask for a reassurance u/s... Even if you have to say you’re not sure about last period date! That will get you an ultrasound. Congratulations OP. And try to relaaaaaaaax

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MrsF90 · 21/02/2019 14:43

These are my favourite kinds of stories, thank you everyone for sharing. Xx

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Gobletoffire · 21/02/2019 17:29

I conceived the first cycle of trying too. I’m currently sat with my feet up because my feet are very achey and swollen as I’m now 36 weeks pregnant :) I’ve had a very smooth pregnancy. Congrats, try not to stress and just enjoy it xx

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MrsF90 · 23/02/2019 09:22

Hi onlyinanemergency, billyandthesillies, bluebell and all the other early mummies. How are we doing? Xx

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DustyDoorframes · 23/02/2019 10:54

Someone posted this on another thread and I've been sharing it wildly since, it's a brilliant calculator that points out how very likely your pregnancy is to keep going:

datayze.com/miscarriage-reassurer.php

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