I think I'm being a bit egocentric starting this thread but I'd really welcome some thoughts/advice/ experiences, esp. from Christians, pagans and anyone in between!
I've always been a Christian - in fact at one point I was going for the priesthood - but my faith has been expressed in different ways throughout my life. During my late twenties I became quite committed and was confirmed as an Anglican. But the church turned out to be quite unpleasant, and my intellectual study of my faith has led me to conclude that much of what Christianity teaches is false or unreliable in terms of the divinity of Jesus, although I still believe in his teachings as to how we should treat one another and ourselves.
My faith doesn't feed me any more. I've had a tough year and I get nothing from my faith, and the less I get the less I want to try. But I have tried, I pray, I read, I go to a different church - but it just isn't happening.
At the same time I've become interested in other spiritual ways. I have been collecting crystals and am starting to meditate. I've decided to get attuned so I can practise Reiki to help heal my children when they are ill. I want to start marking the solstices, and using nature in my sprituality more.
Although this doesn't really form a part of my tradition, it is a part of my family to some extent. My grandmother's family were Irish and I remember during my childhood little 'magic' things like she would never give a bag or purse without putting a coin in it 'so it would never be empty'. I am also sure that my mum described her grandmother as 'a witch'. I've also read a lot of the respected Christian author Elizabeth Goudge's works and her autobiography, and she clearly combined a belief in magic with Christianity.
I think that is what I am trying to do. I'm not interested in tarot or psychic awareness, that's not for me although I have no problem if it is for others. But still I am drawn to something.
If anyone has made it to the end of this, I'd really welcome your thoughts!
Thank you so much!
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Feeling really confused - any advice welcome.
76 replies
nearlythree · 15/01/2007 11:03
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