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School dilemma. What would you do?

(55 Posts)
MmeLindt Wed 06-Aug-08 18:24:39

DH has a new job, supposed to be starting 1st October so we are all moving to Switzerland soon.

The contracts were signed at the end of June and we are just waiting for the goahead from the CEO who has to approve the contract. According to the company this is a formality but they cannot start the ball rolling on the removal until it has been signed. It is a new job in the company that DH has been working for for about 5 years.

For some reason the contracts have not been approved yet although we have been assured that they will be.

Now to the part with the schools.

We are at present in Germany and the schools go back next Tuesday. I had decided not to put DD to school (she should be starting this year) here as she would only be going for 4 - 6 weeks before the move.

Now the move might be delayed, and I don't know what to do. Realistically we have to move in September as we are not goign to have a house here from 1st Oct.

If she goes to school next week I am worried that she will just get settled and then we will have to move her to a new school, where she does not know anyone and she does not speak the language. Logically, the new school is goign to come off worse in a comparison.

Would you put her to school here, even if it just going to be for a few weeks? Do we risk not putting her to school and if the move is delayed have her not starting school until perhaps November.

If you have got this far, then I would be grateful for any comments and suggestions as I am fed up with the sleepless nights while I lie awake and worry about her.

Have to go and make tea/put the DCs to bed but will be back later.

Elasticwoman Wed 06-Aug-08 18:40:56

yes, I would put her into school, but explain situation to the school and keep a close eye on her, to see how she settles. Four to six weeks is quite a long time at her age and what's the alternative - stay at home with you and the tv?

MingMingtheWonderPet Wed 06-Aug-08 18:41:10

How old is your DD?

Is she used to going to some kind of pre-school in germany at the moment?

As long as move is definite for before Xmas I would be inclined to wait and start her once you move, if it could drag then I would be more inclined to start school.

Will you have to buy a lot of school uniform that will quickly become redundant?

LadyMuck Wed 06-Aug-08 18:49:38

I guess that first of all I would check as to whether there was a legal requirement for her to be at a school. If there is no legal requirement then I would wait it out (unless she is so used to the daily routine of nursery etc that it would throw her more by not going).

MmeLindt Wed 06-Aug-08 18:53:01

She is used to kindergarten preschool so is already fed up being at home.

She is legally required to go to school but the school have said that they would not make her if it is a matter of weeks.

No uniform

MmeLindt Wed 06-Aug-08 18:53:47

She is 6yo and desperate to start school. She can't wait till she can read.

MmeLindt Wed 06-Aug-08 20:10:09

bump for more opinions

Hulababy Wed 06-Aug-08 20:13:43

I think I would send her, especially as she is keen.

Have you sat down with her and explained what is happening? At 6y I think she would be able to understand that this school is only for a little bit.

purits Wed 06-Aug-08 20:28:30

"For some reason the contracts have not been approved yet although we have been assured that they will be."

Sorry to be a doom-merchant but, what with the credit crunch and all that, are you sure that everything is on track?

MmeLindt Wed 06-Aug-08 20:48:31

I have spoken to her and she understands the situation. She is looking forward to the move but is sad to have to leave her friends.

No, we are not worried about that. It is a position that has to be filled. We have since found out that it is not unusual to have to wait a couple of months for the signature. I don't understand why, noone seems to know that. It is not really inkeeping with the company, they are normally really fab to their staff.

orangehead Wed 06-Aug-08 20:52:17

Would it be possible to home school her for a few months?

GrinningGorilla Wed 06-Aug-08 20:59:36

I can understand the stress this is causing. We were due to move country in October and now this has been delayed until January. Our move was end october initially and I wasn't going to put ds1 into school for 7 weeks. It seemed unfair that he would get settled and then move. Now its up to 4 months, so he will be going to school. IMO I would start her in school just in case the move takes longer than expected.

mrsruffallo Wed 06-Aug-08 21:19:22

I would keep her at home with me.
It is quite easy to access any educational information on the internet, or use the key stage one books that you can buy.
4-6 weeks is not such a long tme in a childs life, and going to school is such a big stage in their life that it is better to wait until you can offer more permanence

MmeLindt Wed 06-Aug-08 21:29:06

I would love to home school her, but it is illegal here in Germany. I could get away with it for a couple of weeks perhaps but then I would have SS at the door.

Uriel Wed 06-Aug-08 21:31:50

You're not going to the German speaking part of Switzerland, then?

I think I'd send her to school.

MmeLindt Wed 06-Aug-08 21:31:57

Isn't it horrible? We were all geared up to move, the kids were ok with it, even getting excited a bit. Now we are stuck.

I have stopped working as I thought we were moving. I just want to be GONE!

How did your DS take to going to school after all? Is it his first year too?

MmeLindt Wed 06-Aug-08 21:33:25

We are moving to Geneva, so the French speaking part. I just know that she is going to find it difficult to move schools and with the added problem with the language...

But leaving her at home is going to drive us all mad. She is so ready for school.

Uriel Wed 06-Aug-08 21:35:25

Would it be possible to help her learn some French before you go - either yourself or a tutor?

Frenchschoolat6 Wed 06-Aug-08 21:42:38

Changed name for this to avoid identification - but wanted to share my experience.

My parents relocated when I was 6, the same as your DD and the international school was not well thought of so they stuck me in a French Lycee. Every lesson in French and I couldn't even say my name.

You'd be amazed at how quickly I picked it up, really amazed. Being in an entirely french speaking environment forces you to learn so quickly, and 6 is the best of all ages to start. Within two terms I was perfectly fluent.

Don't worry. She'll be absolutely fine and it's the best thing for her. She'll thank you for it when she grows up bilingual.

MmeLindt Wed 06-Aug-08 21:43:52

She has been doing French lessons once a week for the last year. And a summer school this year once we realised that Geneva was finally going to happen.

DH's company have just sent an email to ask if we want them (DS too, although he is just 4yo) to go to a French school.

Feel like saying yes, just to cost them a lot of money for a private school to make up for the stress they are causing.

MmeLindt Wed 06-Aug-08 21:46:40

Thanks for that, Frenchy. I am pretty sure she will do ok when we finally get there. She is already bilingual German/English.

We decided against an international school too. Good to hear from someone who has had a good experience in a French speaking school.

MmeLindt Wed 06-Aug-08 21:53:03

I am off to bed now. Thanks for all your advice, it has given me some new ideas to mull over and helped me sort out my feelings a bit.

trockodile Thu 07-Aug-08 07:43:52

If she is happy to go i would send her to school-it is such a big deal in Germany, she may feel she has missed out on the good part!

If not is there any way she could stay at kindergarten?

MmeLindt Thu 07-Aug-08 08:30:07

I know, that is why I am leaning towards her at least having a proper Einschulung. She would not have that at all if we don't send her here.

She cannot stay in kita as she is 6yo already. They have to go to school here at 6yo. I don't know if that is just NRW

jimjamshaslefttheyurt Thu 07-Aug-08 08:34:23

Send her if she is a keen to go. Otherwise she'll be moping round your feet for weeks. If she didn't want to go I'd say leave it, but as she's keen and it may be for few months she should go.

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