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AIBU to not want to pay in full?

(185 Posts)
Lincspeeps Tue 26-Mar-19 07:57:52

DD is in before and after-school childcare in a small place near Peterborough. We used them for DS for three years and DD has been there for five years. Never had any problems with them and have got to know staff very well.

Last week we had a call to say that due to an admin oversight our cheques from May and July 2018 have never been banked (total of £580) and as they are almost 9 and 11 months old they need replacements as the bank won't take them.

We hadn't realised they hadn't been banked and, being honest, that money is no longer available. Obviously an error on their part and on ours. We have offered to pay them £100 per month but they want it all or they won't accommodate DS after Easter.

AIBU to not want to pay it all out. We would have to go into overdrafts to find the lump sum and would be charged. As it's a dual error I don't think £100 per month for six months is it?

Crossfitgirl Tue 26-Mar-19 10:35:08

@lincspeeps could you just get an interest free credit card and pay on that? Then pay it off at £100 a month. There's usually plenty that offer 12 months interest free.
They can take card payment right? In this day and age?
Then just cut up the card when you've finished with it.

oh4forkssake Tue 26-Mar-19 10:39:12

A payment plan is the fairest option here. It's a bit off that you didn't notice but it's ridiculous that they didn't either! They clearly don't need it that badly.

havingtochangeusernameagain Tue 26-Mar-19 10:42:21

It seems to me that you have met your obligations by providing payment promptly. They have failed to process that payment

This. I don't think it's the OP's responsibility to provide payment again. If I provide a business with a cheque, I expect them to cash it expeditiously.

All of you blaming the OP for this, if you received a cheque from a business and forgot to cash it, would you expect the business to write another cheque?

Thought not.

CluedoAddict Tue 26-Mar-19 10:49:57

@havingtochangeusernaneagain Yes I would absolutely contact the company to reissue a cheque. A cheque is a promise to pay an amount of money.

OVienna Tue 26-Mar-19 10:58:13

Agree with @havingtochangeusernameagain .

If is screwed up and not cashed a client's cheque after nearly 11 months I would approach them very tentatively indeed. It's crap organisation on their part. I'd offer a discount (and an apology) if they agreed to pay up immediately.

I can quite imagine a nursery that could fill its places quickly taking this line though. It's shit management.

MaybeitsMaybelline Tue 26-Mar-19 10:59:43

I also don’t get how you could not realise these cheques hadn’t cleared. To not be able to stump up 500 quid now suggests that an “extra” 500 quid a few months ago would have been very visible to you. I don’t think the child care provider owes you a payment plan. I suspect they have done n end of year audit which identified the cheques and you needn’t to make the cash available to them.

LoudBatPerson Tue 26-Mar-19 11:00:43

Yes, we are a bit shit at managing our finances but nothing more.

Hopefully, this will highlight the importance of keeping a proper track of payments, particularly when the exact date of them is outside of your control (as it is when paying via cheque).

The onus is on you to ensure that your account contains enough funds to cover any outstanding cheques which have not been cashed.

If the provider is not willing to accept a repayment scheme and keep providing care, I do not see you have a choice but to find another provider and make the repayments over time to the old provider.

I imagine that the terms you signed up for the provider will have a clause about removing the place if there is an outstanding debt, so I doubt you will get them to move.

Yabbers Tue 26-Mar-19 11:03:42

She doesn't have £500 spare and last year she did and it's gone now.

Not difficult to spend 500 quid extra over 9 months and not notice. As I said, how much I have at the end of a month fluctuates wildly. An extra 280 quid at the end of the month wouldn’t set alarm bells ringing that something hadn’t been paid.

but it's just adult financial management to keep an eye on your outgoings, she obviously isn't that flush with cash to have the luxury of ignoring it if she's not able to pay in this situation.
She did keep an eye on it. She had enough money to cover the cheque.

I’d consider myself to be flush with cash. If it were this month I’d manage to pay 500 quid, but if it had been last month I wouldn’t.

Lincspeeps Tue 26-Mar-19 11:05:26

Thanks for all your comments - even those having a dig.

I have cancelled both cheques and phoned the business just now and offered to pay 4 x £150 starting today. The person I spoke to is passing this offer on to the manager this afternoon.

Regarding my finances, we didn't go on holiday last year so had much more disposable income floating around. This year we are going away and are paying £400 towards it each month, which is why conjuring up £580 immediately is so difficult.

cstaff Tue 26-Mar-19 11:07:30

Hopefully your offer will be accepted OP. They are being very unreasonable if not.

LoudBatPerson Tue 26-Mar-19 11:07:50

if the OP had paid in cash which the child care shoved in a drawer, 9 months later they tell the OP they have lost the envelope would you all still expect the OP to pay again?...I am just trying to point out that the care provider needs to take some responsibility.

No, because in that case, the OP would have actually paid the provider. When you give someone a cheque, they have not actually been paid until the cheque is cashed and cleared.

The care provider has indeed not done particularly well, however when paying by cheque it is the person paying by cheque who makes the promise of the actual payment, and is liable for that payment when the cheque is cashed (unless the cheque is cancelled etc, which wouldn't matter here as the services have already been provided, so the OP is liable for the cost).

hahshbsbskao Tue 26-Mar-19 11:16:47

100% agree with your payment plan OP, you obviously made a mistake not realising it hadn't been taken, but then so did they! They're being ridiculous to not accept it.

Anique105 Tue 26-Mar-19 11:21:11

What it comes down to is that you need to pay. You should have noticed that amount in your account. As many pointed out if you didnt notice it then why cant you make that extra amount. Its obvious you spent it.

You can kick up a fuss but do you want it to come down to your ds not having a place there and finding somewhere else.

GabsAlot Tue 26-Mar-19 12:07:56

sorry your holiday shouldnt be the priority here-you owe a business money they should be paid first

Graphista Tue 26-Mar-19 12:19:07

How on earth could you not have noticed the money didn't come out of your account?!

You owe the money you need to pay up.

I'd have been chasing them after the first month if it hadn't gone out precisely to avoid just this situation and I'd have set the money aside so as to avoid spending it.

If it still weren't cashed after 2 months I'd have been cancelling the original cheques and made an appointment to speak to them about their lax accounting.

"No, I didn't realise the additional money was there. It's a joint bank account and money is coming in and out all the time". thats exactly why you SHOULD be keeping a closer eye - such an approach leaves you wide open to fraud or even as you're finding here coming unstuck due to others mistakes

"They normally bank cheques within a week so just assumed they had gone out" never assume when it comes to money. Always check on what's happening

I'm on a tight budget and check my budget weekly, I run a spreadsheet for working out what I can afford and to save for things like Christmas and to "forecast" what my balances should be. Makes it very easy to do quick checks and notice if something is amiss.

Sorry but I'm with pps who think if you're well off enough to not even notice a Cheque of over £500 hasn't been cashed (which I'm very sceptical about) then you can pay it off in full.

ScrewyMcScrewup Tue 26-Mar-19 12:43:35

A payment plan is very reasonable.

Some of these replies are really odd. Hope you enjoy the holiday!

Dottierichardson Tue 26-Mar-19 12:47:42

It seems that MN is full of people who do regular bank reconciliations how nice to see we're a nation of accountants. OP YANBU to ask for a payment plan, the business screwed up, they should go halfway to meet you in sorting this out.

CordeliaEarhart Tue 26-Mar-19 12:49:06

a Cheque of over £500

It wasn't. It was a cheque of less than £300 and two months later another cheque of less than £300. I'd notice if a cheque of £50 wasn't cashed, some would notice £5. It isn't that hard to imagine that some people have different levels of income and expenditure.

Nobody is saying she shouldn't pay it, we're just saying that a payment plan is totally reasonable considering the company were also at fault here.

skye199 Tue 26-Mar-19 12:51:24

Pay them obv!

Dreamingofkfc Tue 26-Mar-19 12:53:45

If you pay by cheque does this mean you don't use the tax free child care scheme? Are you both working? It will save you 20%

Lincspeeps Tue 26-Mar-19 13:02:22

I completely agree that I need to pay. Non payment is not an option - I'm not a thief and, having checked my bank statement for the past few years have worked out I have paid them a total of £23,260 - I just feel that this should 'buy' me some leeway in paying back their mistake.

If I was offering £1 per month for life I'd understand some of the negativity on here but I don't think my 'upped' offer of £150 x 4 is unreasonable for a business I have given so much to.

Other obviously have differing views and I respect that.

Pinkyyy Tue 26-Mar-19 13:04:47

I can't believe you're getting such a hard time. Of course they can't demand a lump sum-its their error not yours. Paying in installments should be fine.

septembersunshine Tue 26-Mar-19 13:11:18

Op, we pay for our ds nursery fees via bank transfear and use our ds name has the reference. That way we know the money was transfeared and have a record of it. Maybe do that next time?

Op, I would just pay up in full now and put it behind you. If you really can't afford that then offer to pay half immediately and the other half on a date agreed to by all the parties involved. Yes, it was their error but these things happen. I don't blame you for not noticing. The other day I found out my 10 year old son had unwittingly signed me up on Amazon (using his tablet that I opened with my Amazon account) to get music or was an ongoing payment, £10 a month. A year later I noticed this. A year. And I check my online banking account twice a week.

KittyVonCatsington Tue 26-Mar-19 13:14:31

Sorry but I'm with pps who think if you're well off enough to not even notice a Cheque of over £500 hasn't been cashed (which I'm very sceptical about) then you can pay it off in full.

What a heartless thing to say. Highlights the contempt some Mumsnetters have of those not counting every penny.

OP, you have handled this fairly. I hope that your latest offer to them is accepted.

TheFaerieQueene Tue 26-Mar-19 13:14:58

Cancelled the cheque 🤣

A MN oldie but goodie.

Raspberrytruffle Tue 26-Mar-19 13:29:24

Wow that would annoy me but unfortunately you do need to pay op.
Did you not notice that you had more money in your bank than expected? Money is tight for us so we watch every penny and if I were to pay by check I'd be ensuring that money was not touched and if they had not asked for it after a while I would of contacted them asking why? I can't sleep until I know the money has been taken but that's just me I'd worry if I had nothing to worry about grin

bbcessex Tue 26-Mar-19 13:30:35

OP - had the nursery lost the cheques?

Did you incur a charge for cancelling them?

I think you’ve been more than reasonable to be honest

lottiegarbanzo Tue 26-Mar-19 13:35:54

This thread is sanctimony-tastic.

BlueJag Tue 26-Mar-19 13:46:48

You been having free childcare. Do your best to pay them even if it mean an overdraft.

2rachtint Tue 26-Mar-19 13:49:31

I think your offer is totally reasonable!

I had my bank's home insurance and randomly they stopped taking the direct debit. I didn't notice until many months later when they sent me a final demand for the money (no previous comms of any kind) - when I called them I offered a payment plan which they said no to but suggested I complain higher up which I did and they wiped it. I was more than happy to pay but didn't have a spare few hundred at that time of the month.

A payment plan is a fair and good solution to their error.

swingofthings Tue 26-Mar-19 13:50:06

Let's hope they accept the arrangement. The reason why they will be insistent will be for auditing purposes, an accounting exercise, it won't be personal or them being difficult for the sake of it.

Really you were both negligent. Some posters said you paid, but you didn't. Writing a cheque is not paying. Having the money coming out of your account is. There are a number of reasons why a cheque can be rejected. I had one rejected recently because of a basic error most wouldn't have noticed.

You have to take responsibility for not managing your budget better. What if it had been the other way around and somehow they had cashed the cheque twice?

Purpletigers Tue 26-Mar-19 13:55:20

You should pay it now . Overdraft , credit card if necessary. They will have bills to pay too .

Cheby Tue 26-Mar-19 13:56:59

YANBU. A payment plan is perfectly sensible. It’s what they would get in small
Claims court anyway.

givemesteel Tue 26-Mar-19 14:10:03

It doesn't matter what we randoms on the internet think is reasonable or not, the nursery are not accepting a payment plan (reasonable on my opinion) so you either need to pay them or risk your credit rating being messed up for the sake of £500 as well as not having any childcare.

Use your overdraft or get a credit card, or if you know anyone who can lend it to you borrow it from them instead and pay back in £100 installments.

You sound like you need some better financial management strategies, do you have text alerts that tell you in/outgoings?

flowery Tue 26-Mar-19 14:10:46

” don't think my 'upped' offer of £150 x 4 is unreasonable for a business I have given so much to.

Other obviously have differing views and I respect that.”

Ultimately the only person whose view is relevant about whether your offer is reasonable is the business owner/decision maker. Either they’ll accept it or they won’t, and if they won’t you’ll have a decision to make about your DC childcare.

Starch Tue 26-Mar-19 14:13:22

Yes they will accept a payment plan to get the money if there’s no other option. They just won’t provide the OP with childcare in that case.

Hopefully the increased offer will make the difference.

Numptysod Tue 26-Mar-19 14:18:25

At end of day, they got cheques they didn’t bank them, they’re falut tbh.

RavenLG Tue 26-Mar-19 14:22:34

OP, I don't think you're totally unreasonable asking for a payment plan, and your suggestion is sensible. However, I do hope this will make you more aware of your incomings and outgoings, as not noticing 2 fairly substantial cheques haven't gone out is a bit irresponsible.

It seems that MN is full of people who do regular bank reconciliations how nice to see we're a nation of accountants.
On the other hand, it's clear not checking your bank and having a clue what is going in / out is very damaging and people often end up in situations worse than the OP here. This is why we are a nation of debt. It's not about tallying up every single penny, but it's about being financially responsible. Comments like this is why more finance/budgeting needs to be taught in schools.

Lincspeeps Tue 26-Mar-19 14:43:36

UPDATE: Business owner has been on and apologised for their error. The person who did the banking last year has left the organisation and I am not the only parent affected.

She says she is more than happy to accept 4 x £150 and says her manager should have accepted the offer of 6 x £100 when offered as it was their mistake.

All's well that ends well. I will keep a closer eye on my financial outgoings in the future! Thanks for all who contributed to this discussion, even those of you who were extremely sanctimonious ;-0

oh4forkssake Tue 26-Mar-19 14:46:23

Good result OP

MissConductUS Tue 26-Mar-19 14:46:33

It seems that MN is full of people who do regular bank reconciliations how nice to see we're a nation of accountants.

It's not like you have to do them manually with a quill pen and green eye shade. It's quite quick and easy with some software. I track it in Quicken, which will download my transactions from my bank, so minimal effort. Not doing so might mean missing a bank error or fraudulent withdrawal.

My daughter's rowing association takes months to cash her registration checks. It drives me batty.

cstaff Tue 26-Mar-19 14:48:27

Great result OP. I am sure you are relieved.

StealthPolarBear Tue 26-Mar-19 15:00:03

Glad it's been resolved.
To all those people saying how come you were so rich you didn't notice and now you're skint? Have you come across the concept of people's circumstances changing?

havingtochangeusernameagain Tue 26-Mar-19 15:04:55

Glad they've agreed to a payment plan - pity they didn't offer a reduction given it was their error, not yours. But anyway, maybe you could suggest to them that you set up a standing order in future. Cheques seems like a high maintenance way to pay - both for you having to write them and them having to cash them.

PandaBlue Tue 26-Mar-19 15:24:42

Glad to hear the owner is much more reasonable than some posters on here!

Urgh2019 Tue 26-Mar-19 15:31:22

I used to pay DDs nursery electronically using Busy Bee vouchers.
I got a threatening letter saying I hadn’t paid for 6 months.
I had. The business has changed email addresses but hadn’t changed it with busy bee so hadn’t had notification.
This was part of a large chain of nurseries with a finance office. It took weeks to sort out. They also tried to remove DD whilst it was being sorted out.
These are businesses making a lot of money, they need to act like it sometimes.

Rockmysocks Tue 26-Mar-19 16:17:39

I'm just gobsmacked so many people commented that she didn't notice an extra 500 odd.... It wasn't ever that in any one month, it was 2 or 3 cheques not cashed so either half or third of the total. A much smaller amount to be extra and very easy for it to go unnoticed.

Glad it's sorted out OP.

Pinkyyy Tue 26-Mar-19 16:40:06

I'd like to see all the posters who have berated the OP put themselves into debt to pay a lump sum, just to rectify someone else's mistake. Glad it's sorted OP.

aspoonfulofyourownmedicine Wed 27-Mar-19 17:44:18

I don't think the OP is being unreasonable either. She's offered to pay the money owed, in instalments and I don't think it's all her fault, if at all.

I can't honestly say that I would notice money not going out of my account and I'm usually skint. This is because I get paid monthly on 2 different days from 3 different jobs, plus commission on another day from my other job, the my DH gets paid weekly for one employment and monthly from another employment, so there's always cash moving around the account. I have in the past failed to notice a failed DD for a gas account, but thought nothing of it as a DD was coming out for the same company - I hadn't realised it wasn't a dual fuel payment. And I've also not noticed an ongoing issue with NT membership not being taken properly, until I got a letter saying they'd been unable to take a direct debit for 3 months.......

PurplePenguins Wed 27-Mar-19 17:47:44

Have they definitely not cashed the cheques? I had a debt letter saying similar but they had cashed the cheques and I proved it it was an admin error. They had the receipt but hadn't put it on the system. As it's their error too, I think YABR.

Relaxitsonlyababy Wed 27-Mar-19 17:51:40

Wow. I can’t no believe how rude people are being. It’s not like she said she wasn’t gonna pay just that she needed a bit of a compromise - maybe circumstances ahve since changed given it was 9 & 11 months ago. Is there proof it’s her cheque missing and not someone else’s? It’s a pretty epic admin error. she’s used this nursery / childcare option for what 5yrs+ And never had an issue. As a gesture of goodwill I’d be accepting the payment plan. I guatentee there’s people owing far more And being far leas reasonable.

We have a separate bills account. Which is backed up by an overdraft but I don’t flick through it to see what’s been in and outX we always add extra and it once took us 5months to notice British Gas he changed our DD amount. I can see how it was missed especially if there’s been a change in circumstance.

RomanyQueen1 Wed 27-Mar-19 17:55:23

Can you borrow the money or ask if you can pay in two instalments rather than £100 per week.
They need a new system so this doesn't happen again, and you need to be vigilant and check regularly.
The tax year finishes at the end of March, they obviously need to have the books straight.

aspoonfulofyourownmedicine Wed 27-Mar-19 18:01:03

I've just read the OP properly again and realised that it was 2 separate months - May and July - so it's not like the OP had £580 randomly sitting in the account - that's £290 in May and £290 in July, not £580 in one go. Sometimes I have a little bit extra money where I've worked extra shifts on my 'zero hour' contract bar job, or where I've worked during school holidays doing extra holiday work so would have bit extra cash.

** Glad they've accepted a payment plan OP

floribunda18 Wed 27-Mar-19 18:04:42

Bollocks that you didn't notice the cheques hadn't been cashed. If you can't afford £500 now then you would have noticed.

However, it is shitty on their part. I'd find somewhere else to take the kids, and pay them back £100 a month.

ToftyAC Wed 27-Mar-19 18:05:43

Yes they might take you to court and win, but the court would also take a dim view that a sensible repayment plan had been put forward and would possibly order that you do pay it monthly.

JustTwoMoreSecs Wed 27-Mar-19 18:14:01

I don't get how you don't notice the extra £580 but now don't have enough money to pay at least half My thoughts exactly.

Ipithombi Wed 27-Mar-19 18:14:53

I think you knew the money hadn’t gone out and thought you’d got lucky! You owe them the money. You need to pay it.

Beeziekn33ze Wed 27-Mar-19 18:23:07

Lincspeeps - Glad to see that they saw sense and accepted £150x4.
What a lot of hypercritical posts from those with impeccable financial acumen.
And then there are the ones who (wilfully?) misunderstood and decided you were trying not to pay 🙄

MsAdorabelleDearheartVonLipwig Wed 27-Mar-19 18:26:53

I don't get how you don't notice the extra £580 but now don't have enough money to pay at least half

My thoughts exactly.

Well, if you won’t read the bloody thread... hmm

MadMadaMim Wed 27-Mar-19 18:32:17

I'd offer £280 now and then 3 installments of £100.

I don't have much money but also wouldn't notice an extra £580 over a 3-4 month period. I never know how much I have until I haven't got any....

I check maybe 2-3 x per month

SnowyAlpsandPeaks Wed 27-Mar-19 18:32:59

I didn’t know anyone had cheque books anymore......

Sara107 Wed 27-Mar-19 18:35:36

Some harsh comments. I could easily not notice the cheques not being cashed. We don’t get bank statements any more and I don’t regularly check the account- same amount goes in every month, roughly the same comes out as we pay all bills by monthly direct debit. We would run at a slight surplus so that over time a nest egg builds up to deal with one off bills like the house insurance., school shoes etc. The nursery have messed up on 2 separate occasions so they clearly have a systemic problem in dealing with cheque payments - I would want to know how they are going to do things differently to stop that happening again. I think, as the mistake is theirs, it is absolutely reasonable to pay them off in instalments.

BlueCornishPixie Wed 27-Mar-19 18:37:59

Some posters on here are such dicks. Being a sanctimonious arse doesn't make you look clever or better than others.

I can see how you might not notice, I am self employed so my monthly income fluctuates for example. And my monthly expenditure could easily fluctuate by 200 if it had been an easy month ( no surprise spends etc)

It was their mistake, it's been 11 months. I think if you go to a customer and say we haven't cashed your cheque from 11 months ago you have to show some leniency for your mistake! You can't expect someone to be able to pay you nearly 600 in one go if you failed to cash their cheques. That's totally unreasonable. I wouldn't dream of doing that to someone who had paid me nearly 25k over the years!

OP never suggested not paying, this is a totally fair arrangement, preventing the OP going into debt and the business getting their money. Some people on this thread act like owing a business money is the worst thing in the world.

springbreak3 Wed 27-Mar-19 19:06:46


Also confused as to how you didn't notice £580 not going out, but now cannot afford to pay it. Have your finances got severely bad in the last few months?

It's bad that they only just realised it, and it would be nice if they let pay instalments. However, they don't have to do that.

As a few pps said though, they can't need the money that bad if they didn't notice the money missing (when you paid it to them in the middle of last year!)

I agree with the posters saying it's their fault as much as the OP's and they should let her pay in instalments. Threatening to not take her DD after Easter is nasty. It's basically blackmail.

springbreak3 Wed 27-Mar-19 19:07:50

Not having a go OP, I just struggle to get why anyone wouldn't notice the money not going out, but I know we are all different....... I hope it works out OK for you. smile flowers

springbreak3 Wed 27-Mar-19 19:09:30

JUST NOTICED they accepted the £150 x 4.

Sorry! I did all read the thread except the last 2 pages.

What a tit.

Good result smile

Bessica1970 Wed 27-Mar-19 19:19:11

Not everyone checks their bank statements - I certainly don't. You haven't done anything wrong and have not said you won't pay. As it's their mistake, they should allow you to pay in instalments. I would repeat your offer, and tell them that if they withdraw your childcare offer you will be writing to Ofsted. After all it could unsettle your child to have to go to a different nursery.

If however you can manage to pay in one go somehow, I would do it, just to avoid any bad feeling between you and the nursery. They may be less likely to overlook minor problems if you dig your heels in over this.

Bessica1970 Wed 27-Mar-19 19:22:11

Oops - didn't see the later posts until now!

Playmytune Wed 27-Mar-19 19:27:49

If you are on a tight budget you need to keep on top of your finances. If you aren’t checking your outgoings against your available finance you are, at the very least, being very foolish!
I check my statement every month to ensure the numbers tally with what I think is in the account.
You should pay this money owed now as it your responsibility to do so. Get an overdraft or bank loan and clear your debt! Then take more responsibility for your finances!

RomanyQueen1 Wed 27-Mar-19 19:31:53

I check regularly now as something similar happened to me once with dancing fees, costumes etc. Thought I'd paid and they hadn't put it through.
Every month or more often is checked now, if you have online banking it takes no time to check.

sewingismyhobby Wed 27-Mar-19 19:32:00

You did pay them at the time with a cheque.

Their issue is their crap admin processes and it makes it their problem that the bank will no longer honour the cheques.

I'll wouldn't be offering to pay them anything without a court order.

Iseewhatyoumeanthistime Wed 27-Mar-19 19:46:57

I know your issue has been resolved OP, but it can happen and it happened to me. I used to give nursery a cheque every week, (they didn't at the time take card payments) which would be cashed within a week or so. The manager left then I noticed the cheques would be cashed sporadically, 2 or 3 at a time, once 6 cheques were cashed at a time but were about 2 or 3 months old and out of sync. It was when they came to me with 2 old cheques that couldn't be cashed and returned to them as I had changed bank accounts and the account was closed. Luckily nursery agreed to me paying a bit extra every week to cover the outstanding amount. I didn't notice because my DH is self employed and pays all different amounts in to our bank account each week and i didn't religiously check they were cashed. Plus my fees could be different each week. I then started to transfer the money to a saving account and put it back into current account once the cheque was cashed and I even started making a note of the cheque number and ticking it off when cashed. Much easier now you can bank transfer or make card payment .

flowergrrl77 Wed 27-Mar-19 20:21:25

Glad that it all ended well!

Like someone else on here, I too have a separate account for cheques, I transfer funds as I write the cheque so I know I can’t accidentally spend money twice!

Good luck xx

Yabbers Wed 27-Mar-19 20:44:47

They will have bills to pay too
Then they should be more careful with banking cheques.

If you are on a tight budget you need to keep on top of your finances.
She’s wasn’t on a tight budget. It’s only now it’s tighter because of a booked holiday.

Bollocks that you didn't notice the cheques hadn't been cashed. If you can't afford £500 now then you would have noticed.
Last month I had a whole load of cash in my account. I paid off the flights for my holiday last week then a week later got confirmation my daughter’s SN trike was ready (three weeks earlier than expected) and could I pay 560 quid for it. The holiday was three times that amount and I could pay it out of my account. This meant I couldn’t send a cheque for the bike and it went on the credit card until next payday. It is possible to have a lot of money one month but not have it the next, even more possible for things to change over 9 months. It is also entirely possible for people not counting every penny not to notice two separate 290 cheques not being cashed over a 3 month period. Why is that so hard a concept to grasp?

nuxe1984 Wed 27-Mar-19 20:53:04

Do you not keep monthly accounts? A running total from which you take off your commitments, like mortgage, bills, etc? And checked your bank statements against payments made, cheques written, etc?Surely you'd have noticed this much spare cash left ... sounds to me as tho you were hoping they didn't noticed that the cheques hadn't been cashed.

M4J4 Wed 27-Mar-19 21:01:33

And how would you feel working for 2 months, realising you didn't get paid, and then find out your boss won't pay you.
This will go to court they will win.

Are people really this thick?


She wanted a payment plan, which is more than reasonable.

I bet lots will be pissed off that OP is not being forced now to pay it off at once. Who gives a shit if she has rent and bills to pay hmm

manicmij Thu 28-Mar-19 08:47:16

You should pay. They seem to be a bit harsh though not accepting a payment plan however they are due the money. Trying to find a new place may be difficult if the new place contacts your current one for info a out child/reference. You may be black listed. Hard lesson.

lottiegarbanzo Thu 28-Mar-19 09:37:00

You should definitely cancel the cheque wink

Faultymain5 Thu 28-Mar-19 09:48:14

How hard is to to read the thread before giving an opinion that doesn't even count anymore?

Mememeplease Thu 28-Mar-19 09:48:15

Good because they'd be cutting off their nose to spite their face if they were prepared to lose such a loyal customer over their mistake.

Teacher22 Thu 28-Mar-19 10:21:55

My advice is to keep an account book. I do and I would have taken the nursery fees off my running total of disposable money. It would have been sitting in the account if the cheques were not cashed and I could have rewritten the cheques with no problem.

I cannot see how you can order your finances if you do not know the true position of your income, liabilities and disposable money at all times.

Lweji Thu 28-Mar-19 10:28:32

I think they are lucky that parents are prepared to pay in installments at all and the manager should apologise to you for having insisted on full payment immediately with threats of not having the child over Easter.
What if you had given them the money but they had lost it? Would they still want you to pay them twice?
Glad the business owner has more sense. Maybe that's why she's the owner. wink

Aveeno2017 Thu 28-Mar-19 10:34:16

How can anybody not know that money hasn't been taken out of their account for months? Of course you need to pay...maybe that's why you lack funds now!

Lincspeeps Thu 28-Mar-19 14:03:58

OMG - I can't believe the number of comments that have continued coming in criticising me LOL.

Some points:

1. Yes, my financial acumen is poor. I will be keeping a much closer eye on my accounts in future.

2. We pay by cheque as that's the only payment method accepted.

3. For the third and final time, no matter what some (many!) of you appear to think, I didn't not miss the money. I was not trying to steal it. I did not think I was going to 'get away without paying'.

Thanks again for all your comments. It has genuinely been helpful.

However, to all of you who made comments along the lines of "I don't believe for a second you didn't notice the cheques hadn't left your account" (or words to that effect)….….this approach to dealing with people will win you absolutely no friends in life and result only in sadness.

You may feel superior and all-knowing when you type it but, with no evidence whatsoever to back up your claims, then you are really not much more than a troll.

Thanks again to all who gave their time and constructive advice.

FaveNumberIs2 Thu 28-Mar-19 21:11:52

For all the people wondering how the op can't know there was an extra £580 in the bank ... the cheques were over two separate months, so not £580 all in one go.

Secondly, I never have a clue what's in my own bank. It's true, I don't have to fork out for childcare, but I do have regular bills and shopping to do. The only day I could give a clue as to what's in the bank, is payday. And even then I'd probably be wrong.

So get off the op's back about it being impossible to know that there was extra funds in her account.

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