To think it’s a bad sign when people suddenly start messaging less?

[AisleWindowSeats]

Had first date with someone, he asked me out again same night and we had a bit of chat after saying how much had both enjoyed it. He sent last message, ended on a statement.

He had promised to send me some recommendations for somewhere and messaged again a couple of days later with them. I replied back thanking him and restarted the convo, answered his questions etc. Nothing since :s This was all yesterday afternoon...

Before the date, we’d been texting a fair amount to establish a connection...

[GreyGardens88]

Block him

[MyGastIsFlabbered]

Are you me OP? I've had the exact same thing happen to me this weekend. I can't help but think it's a bad sign

[HollyBollyBooBoo]

Or they're busy and don't sit on their phone all day?

[AisleWindowSeats]

They knew I was busy all weekend too. Everyone has time to send a message though. A friend thinks he’s playing it cool - especially given he double texted etc. Urgh oh well. It’s annoying m

[DickensianHysteric]

So it's only been around 24 hours since the last message? Maybe he's just been busy.

[BackforGood]

Like Holly - I'd assume they were busy. Or they just weren't attached to their phone all day. Or the phone wasn't charged.
Yesterday afternoon is no time at all.

[AlphaBravo]

Or maybe he just doesnt know what to say? The build up is always chatty then after the high the low happsens and you get a lull in texts. It's totally normal. Text him tomorrow and ask him if he fancies a drink next week

[AnotherDayAnotherName745]

I think you said the next date was arranged before the end of the first? He may just feel that there won't be as much to chat about if you exchange texts all the time. Or he may be busy. I know how u feel, but I don't think you should read too much into this, just leave home a while and see if he texts again.

[MellowMelly]

It could be ‘the game’. A few male friends I know like to go cool for a while in the early stages of the dating ritual. They reckon it keeps us thinking about them

[AisleWindowSeats]

Ugh I get it but it’s annoying. I’m not going to double text but won’t leave it a long time if he does message. Yeah next date has been arranged in terms of day but not place/time etc. Will see I guess

[AisleWindowSeats]

If we do have a second date and it goes well but he keeps this up, think I will leave it. Not really what I want :s

[HollyBollyBooBoo]

OMG you are way over thinking this...it's a very scary insight into dating!!

[PerverseConverse]

I had this and was told on here that I was BU and to chill. My gut said the guy was not making an effort and that something was "off" but I listened to those on here saying to go on the date and give him a chance. Worst date of my life. Deleted and blocked within 10 mi utes of the date ending. Listen to your gut! Everybody is busy but when they go from chatty to not then they are usually backing off. Usually. IME. Takes seconds to send a text. Gut. Listen.

[JustlikeDevon]

So you have another date lined up?
I don't text. I have zero interest in being harassed by a phone. Maybe he just prefere real life to inane conversations by text?

[Frosty66612]

My DP and I were texting constantly when we found each other on OLD. Literally all day long! After the first date it become much more infrequent (one long message per day usually). I asked him recently why he had dropped the contact so much back then and he admitted that all the constant texting was fun for a few weeks but it was impacting his work and he was getting nothing done. He said it didn’t mean he was getting bored of me or anything like that.
Maybe give him another 24 hours as he could just be busy, ill or somethings come up. If nothing by tomorrow eve then maybe text him asking how his Monday was and if he still doesn’t reply then perhaps think about moving on as it only takes 10 secs to let you know that he’s busy and can’t talk

[Trills]

I’m not going to double text

If everyone abides by that rule then ALL conversations will die out.

[Notmorewashing]

Not that into you ignore and move on

[AisleWindowSeats]

I think not that into me! He seemed very keen on the date etc but this is annoying and rude. Moving on

[Tink1990]

This is why i will be messaging 3/4 at a time so as not to get hung up on one, until the time is right of course

[BlueTears]

🙄 really? 🤦🏼‍♀️

[PerverseConverse]

My rule now (after a few OLD disasters) is that if anything feels off or the communication changes for no known or good reason, or the situation causes you to question things or makes you look needy (look not be) then move on. The dating scene is harsh. Think of it like shopping for something and if one aspect doesn't match your needs then keep looking. Try it on if you like as you never know, some things look better on than on the hanger so to speak

[AisleWindowSeats]

I’m not even hung up :/ Just don’t understand the mixed signals! He insisted on paying, asked me out again immediately, we texted on the night, he followed up a few days later. And now just seems to have fizzled. I know a lot of you will think that it’s only 24 hours but that’s pretty big when you’re still trying to get to know someone/make them interested in you/keep momentum.

[LavendarGreen]

It's only been 24 hours.

Stop stressing - and being so clingy. You will drive him away

[LastNightsMakeUp]

The 'it's only been 24 hours' pp's potentially don't seem like they have dated recently. Before meeting OH a few years ago I did quite a bit of dating. Going quiet so soon after a date isn't a good sign, especially when they had previously been messaging lots. They should be more keen after a date IMO. You can't dwell on it though, set up some more dates with other people and forget about him til he contacts you. Good luck!

[TheSassyAssassin]

I second listen to your gut. If it doesn't feel right for whatever reason then delete and move on. Can't stand anyone who follows "game rules". Ridiculous. You're either into each other or you're not and if it's the latter then better not to waste time investing on any level. Good luck!