Dear All,
I am a male and wanted to get the opinion of this forum rather than a 'forum for dads'. Here are the 2 situations I seek your advice on:
1st situation:
I had an unplanned pregnancy with a woman that I had been dating - we never lived together or had any shared assets. Our daughter is now 4 years old and has been with the woman all that time. We have a reasonably good relationship- it's cordial at best. I am named on the birth certificate and see the little one every weekend for usually the whole day (Saturday or Sunday) and treat my ex and daughter to lunch/dinner. I spend approx upwards of 160 per month on weekly travel to where they live and restaurants, museums, the zoo etc. I have also paid for some large items- cots, TV, scooters, items of clothing etc etc.
We haven't come to an agreement re-maintenance money however I've been paying £500 per month into a savings account for the little since she was born. I was asked for £800 per month initially by my ex however that's beyond my budget. I have a meeting with her in a few weeks to finalise the maintenance amount but I just know she's not going to agree to an amount I suggest and she will ask me to forward her the money in the savings account to hers. I want to do things properly and fairly. What do you think I should do?
2nd: I really want to change this situation and spend more quality time with my daughter but I don't know where to begin. Last week I mentioned taking my daughter to see her grandmother (my mum) but the child's mother said that she needs to accompany us in case my daughter needs to go to the toilet! I found that a slightly bizarre excuse and it revealed how much she is looking to control the situation. As I write this, I sometimes find it hard to believe that I've let things get to this situation!
Thanks for your time reading and getting back to me- it's very much appreciated.
Chris
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Child Maintenance and getting more quality time with my daughter
73 replies
ChrisN2 · 27/05/2018 17:59
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