To sometimes pay for DP's meal when we eat out and vice versa

[LionAllMessy]

If you eat at a restaurant with your DP/DH/DW, do you split the bill based on what you individually ate and drank? Or does just one of you usually pay for the whole meal?

I'm curious as to whether it's common to split the meal when you're in a long-term serious relationship or marriage.

[AnneProtheroe]

We pay on the credit card which we split evenly so I guess it's 50/50 no matter what we ate.

[lanbro]

Not normal. If you manage your individual finances just take turns. Very odd but Even with my friends I'm very relaxed about that sort of thing so wouldn't even occur to me with a long term partner...

[expatinscotland]

We share all money, so one of us pulls out a card.

[T1M2N3T4]

Dp and I take it turns

[arethereanyleftatall]

We just share all our money anyway, so it doesn't matter who pays.

[Shoxfordian]

My dp pays for most of our meals out

[Marmite27]

My DH also pays for most meals out.

We share bills only.

[MissCalamity]

Normally we get it on the joint account, sometimes DP pays, sometimes I pay, regardless of what we've eaten.

[DitheringBlidiot]

We just take it in turns. You’ll get a lot of “it’s family money and your relationship is a sham if you don’t have “our” money” on this post by the way.

[Jozxyqk]

Sometimes DH & I split it, sometimes one pays, sometimes the other one does. If we're out for the day, or on holiday, we usually alternate. So I'll pay for train tickets, he buys lunch, I'll get us a coffee, etc. We don't have shared finance as he's a "spend it now & treat yourself" type, whereas I'm much more of the "save for a rainy day" mindset.

[Love51]

We are married but have separate accounts. Whoever is feeling flush pays. If we are out with his friends he pays, my friends, I pay. We'd never split it. But we might say 'I'll pay, you paid breakfast club and the car bill already this month'. Usually Before we go out.

[Aria2015]

Well now everything is joint we just pay but prior to that we used to fight over who should pay (wanting to pay for the other each time). We never split it, he either paid the whole thing or I did. He did mostly pay but that's because he would sneak off and do while I was in the loo! If I'm with friends we just divide it by the number of us, even if one of us has had a slightly more expensive meal. The only time we don't split it equally is if one is is pregnant and not drinking and alcohol is on the bill. There has to be some small compensation in not being able to drink after all!

It's too much fuss and a bit tight imo to break the bill down and pay exactly for what each person had.

[Bluntness100]

I think it would be very unusual to pay for what you consume in a long term relationship.

We either pay from the joint account, or one of us uses our own account to pay the whole bill. We don't keep a tally or give it much thought.

[fussychica]

We share all money so it's never an issue. There is no his money or my money, it's all our money.

[Mouseville65]

We tend to take it in turns or the flush one says 'shall we eat out' and then pays - have never split based on who ate what.

[JustHereForThePooStories]

I'm curious as to whether it's common to split the meal when you're in a long-term serious relationship or marriage

Wouldn’t have thought it was all common. I don’t know any long-term couples that do this.

We have separate finances and I tend to pay for most meals out.

[19lottie82]

If you are in a relationship it’s a strange set up to get your calculator out and split the bill based on who had what!

We just take it in turns to pay.

[Pikachuneedshelp]

It's pretty random, sometimes I pay, sometimes DP pays.

It wouldn't even enter my head to figure who ate/drank what and pay separately!

[Breakfastofmilk]

We roughly take it in turns. Often if we eat out it's because we're at the theatre or a concert so usually the person who bought the tickets doesn't pay for the meal, but it varies and there's no strict tally, whatever feels fair given our relative finances at any given time m

[mummmy2017]

I used to hand over what I though meal would cost sometimes to OH...
Outside so he could just top it up if it and drinks was more... save an arguments inside....
But he paid more as earner more and he didn't care... but it did mean when we split he would complain about how new GF never ever paid....
Used to make me laugh as he said he didn't realise how good I was about not using him as a bank.

[AndNoneForGretchenWieners]

We have a joint account so whoever gets their card out first pays.

[LeeValley2]

My husband always pays for everything. It would be terribly mean and calculating to split it exactly half. If I saw a couple doing that I’d think it’s sad.

[AllMYSmellySocks]

Joint accounts here. Before we had joint accounts we just took it in turns. Definitely wouldn't add up exactly what we each had - surely it would even out and I wasn't bothered if I was a few quid out of pocket to my partner. We had exactly the same income but if one of us was better off that person would have paid more often.

[AllMYSmellySocks]

My husband still makes the joke every time "I'll get this love" while reaching for the card for our joint account.

[IceBearRocks]

We just have a joint account so we both pay!!??