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That this is the school's responsibility?

(69 Posts)
NeverUseThisName Wed 13-Dec-17 08:39:12

Dc's school have some sort of church activity 3 times a year. I let my dc choose whether they participate. We are not Christian. They used to have a TA supervise one classroom with, say, a film and an art table, for non-churchgoers.

But, as the cohorts have moved the n, fewer and fewer children across the school are being withdrawn from RE activities. The school tend to schedule these trips in the afternoon, and now encourage non-participating children to be collected from school after lunch. Often my youngest dc is the only child remaining at school.

AIBU to r fuse to collect him? I'm at work, and he is registered at school that afternoon.

Auspiciouspanda Wed 13-Dec-17 08:41:33

I can see why they are doing this but I don't agree at all with you having to get them for the afternoon when they should be in school!

Crumbs1 Wed 13-Dec-17 08:41:48

You’re not being unreasonable but it will be a bit boring for him sat outside the school office or somewhere similar whilst others go off home or on a jolly.
Could granny or someone not collect him?

HuskyMcClusky Wed 13-Dec-17 08:42:45

If it is a religious school, I think YABU. Religious activities go with the territory, so if you won’t let him particulate, it’s not reasonable to expect 1:1 staff for him.

sirfredfredgeorge Wed 13-Dec-17 09:06:42

Nope, you have the right to withdraw, they have to come up with something.

Emerald92 Wed 13-Dec-17 09:11:46

YABU, you send your child to a religious school so obviously this was to be expected. It's three times a year. It wont do your DC aby harm to praticipate and learn about religion. RE is compulsory in secondary schools to a certain age so either way they're going to have to learn about different religions.

Hanuman Wed 13-Dec-17 09:12:39

Yanbu. Even if a church school, you have the right to withdraw and they need to come up with something for him to do

halcyondays Wed 13-Dec-17 09:12:51

If he's the only one I'm not sure what they could do with him.

softkittywarmkitty28 Wed 13-Dec-17 09:15:56

Mines the only one in dds school who doesn't do this sort of thing, if there's another class she can go to or a t.a around they will watch her.
Otherwise I will offer to pick her up. Then she either comes to work with me if I'm working or she goes to her nans if she wants

CorbynsBumFlannel Wed 13-Dec-17 09:17:57

Yanbu at all. I don't agree that just because he attends a church school you have to suck up the RE. Some people have no choice if it is the school they are allocated.
You can't be expected to collect him if you work.
What would your son prefer to do? Go along with the others or stay in school alone? If he and you want him to stay in school he is entitled to.

JacquesHammer Wed 13-Dec-17 09:18:11

For the people saying yabu because it's a faith school, you do realise that for some people there is no option?

Where I am 6 out of 7 of the nearest schools are faith schools.

YANBU OP. You have a right to withdraw, they have to sort the issue

chickenowner Wed 13-Dec-17 09:18:18

I think if it's a church school then YABVU.

Emerald92 Wed 13-Dec-17 09:26:08

I'd like to hear what suggestions you have for the school those of you who doesn't think the OP is BU. Schools cant have 2 members of staff stay behind in school for 1 child out of 80. It's a sensible suggestion that the child is collected. Schools are for educating children, not babysitting them.

JacquesHammer Wed 13-Dec-17 09:27:38

Tell the school you won't authorise the absence grin

Jessbow Wed 13-Dec-17 09:33:56

How old is your child? if he cannot stay in school and you cannot collect, why can he not go and sit at the back of the church ( or wherever they are going) and quietly read.

he doesn't have to participate

I feel sorry for the member of staff that has to miss out on things like school carol service in situ such a these

abbsisspartacus Wed 13-Dec-17 09:36:22

I'd it a church school?

swingofthings Wed 13-Dec-17 09:38:05

We're a non-religious family, and yes, there were a lot of such events around Christmas time during primary school years, with a xmas ceremony at the local church with a long speech from the priest, but I didn't feel that our choice of non religion meant that the kids should be excluded from it.

I just told the kids that they were attending as observers of those who follow the religion, so therefore as an event of interest, not that they had to follow on any actions. I told them that the songs were just that, songs that they could enjoy for the sake of singing rather than what was said and to be fair, the priest's speech was very modern and preaching values that were very much those I agreed with, religious or not.

Ironically, although my kids are like the rest of the family not affiliated to any religions, DD found the concept of religion very interesting and decided to take RE at GCSEs and loved it. She visited a mosque and temple during these lessons and loved it. She gained a wide understanding of religions and how they impact on society and is able to respect all of them.

PurpleMinionMummy Wed 13-Dec-17 09:38:45

Yanbu. I would collect mine but I don't work.

Indeed Emerald. So during school time a teacher should be educating him then.

Chaosofcalm Wed 13-Dec-17 09:40:06

Emerald92 RE is Compulsory until a child finishes sixth form but parents do have the right to withdraw students. The OP is describing collective worship.

OP do you withdraw your child from all collective worship eg assemblies and classroom prayers. Classroom prayers are common in my religious schools.

Surfingwhippet Wed 13-Dec-17 09:40:52

He has a right to stay in school but, the school doesn't have a duty to provide alternative activities for him. They just have to supervise him.

AnnieAnoniMouse Wed 13-Dec-17 09:41:17

I don’t have a single religious bone in my body, I’d go as far as to say I think it’s ALL a load of nonsense (but each to their own, worship whatever you like as long as you’re doing no harm to others).

It will do your child no harm to go along to the event...they aren’t going to be converting them with the holiest order of holy things. Singing a few carols & sitting through the others saying the Lords Prayer won’t hurt them. Your child might even enjoy it 😳

You clearly don’t have strong feelings about it either way as you let your child choose 🙄 so stop causing so much hassle for the school because your snowflake doesn’t want to sit still for an hour. Honestly.

SnowJokeNow Wed 13-Dec-17 09:42:02

Yanbu but I used to let DS go to the 3x a year church services when he was at primary school. Waste of school time, in my opinion, but he managed to endure 7 years of it without being indoctrinated.

CorbynsBumFlannel Wed 13-Dec-17 09:43:18

The school need to have the staff to cover as many children who don't wish to take part in RE. Whether that's 1 or 100. Parents have the right to withdraw their kids and schools have to provide a full time education. If they don't have the staff to meet these obligations then they don't have enough staff to run.

SnowJokeNow Wed 13-Dec-17 09:43:43

Annie - don't be a twat, calling the OP's son a snowflake.

user1495451339 Wed 13-Dec-17 09:46:42

It is wrong, but personally if I didn't want to pick up I would let my child attend the religious activity. Think of it as an educational experience. Schools have had massive cuts recently so probably don't have as many TAs as they used to - why not try and be a bit accommodating.

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