DP has suggested I post for some perspective as he can't see my problem. I have been in my job for six months and took over from someone who was really close to my colleagues. This person left a lot of mess behind which I have obviously had to speak about but have tried my best to be diplomatic about. I consider myself to have a good relationship with them too and when I started they said I fit in, was great at the job and they wanted me to stick around. The thing I'm confused about is that one of them added me on Facebook so a couple of months later when a new person joined and added all of us I added 3 of the others I work with most closely as I saw they were friends with her. They rejected my request. They openly talk about stuff they posted making no reference to my friend request. There was talk of going for lunch last week. No one openly invited me but they talked about it in front of me. On the day they said they weren't sure where they were going so I took it as it was a relaxed invite and went with them but as there were five of us they said to follow on in my car as the other 4 were going in my colleague's. It's quite difficult to explain in text but I got the feeling they weren't bothered if I came but I was tagging along. I ended up wishing I'd had the indifference to just say no I'm not bothered about going. One of the colleagues decided just before that she wasn't going but I hadn't said I was at this point so I'm not if she just didn't feel like it or it was because I was. We all have lots of banter in the office and they do take the piss out of me but they do it with each other too. They do get a bit funny if I'm a few minutes late due to school run as they're all in really early in the morning. But they are genuinely friendly with me too. Sometimes I go off on my own at lunch to read my book and I know they think people who sit in their car at lunch etc are weird and antisocial. I just don't know if I have a problem with big groups of people or if I should just take it as it comes and step away from these people a bit. For background in my last job a woman bullied me really badly and tried to leave me out of stuff although the others still included me. Also I do suffer with anxiety and so am more alert to this kind of stuff than others might be hence why I wanted to get some perspective. Thanks if you've made it this far!
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