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Should I ask GP to sign me off?

(79 Posts)
Justcurious000 Mon 03-Apr-17 21:54:29

Really could do with someone to talk to about this, besides friends and family who are probably sick of hearing it. I feel so low and don't know at to do. I am 36 weeks pregnant, my job is becoming increasingly stressful. I work 4 days per week but the workloads coming in lately are hideous and have been for a few weeks now. We are quite a lean team and others in my team feel the same, whereas some people don't have that much work to do. However our particular little team is always at the forefront of everything and are like the back bone of the department, as a result taking the most pressure.

Just lately there have been a few hiccups due to working at a fast pace and the increased workloads. I have been addressed about these hiccups which are genuine, and I've explained to my manager I feel these are down to me working too,quickly etc and wouldn't have happened otherwise. I am a long serving employee with a great track record, have won awards, got promoted etc. My other colleagues have made some equally as bad hiccups, which was just down to rushing etc as well. However these people are full time and my manager doesn't seem too fussed, i.e. they might get an email about it and thats it, whereas I'm asked to go to a meeting to discuss my issues. It seems my manager is a lot more focused on what I do wrong rather than anyone else. That's not paranoia or anything, that is how it is.

She accused me of trying to pass things over to other colleagues all of the time, which is absolutely way off the truth, I rarely pass things over, and am very conscious that i do the exact opposite. You can't challenge her as she's very outspoken and shoots you down quick and fast. She is piling the pressure onto me, constantly emailing me, micromanaging me, where are we at with this, have you actioned this (request from previous day which is extremely low priority) giving me increased work etc. One thing in particular was a project that was optional, but she then shouted across the office that she'd like me to do it to get exposure etc, despite me saying I am reluctant to take it on because of my work pattern and the fact I have a few days annual leave coming Up and I didn't want to delay the project, she insisted I do it. Making me feel bad by saying I already passed up the pervious project where a workshop fell on a day I had a hospital (baby related) appointment that I couldn't rearrange, I therefore had to pass this project onto someone else. She wasn't afraid to tell me that project was for 'me to manage around my part time hours' and she didn't understand why I couldn't have tried to get on another workshop a week later, I told her due to the project deadlines this wouldn't have been the sensible thing to do as it would be pushing things and that it made sense from the outset to decline it and let my very willing and eager colleague to take it on. After all this was optional and for exposure only and in her words this type of stuff shouldn't interfere with business as usual. This latest project is taking up SO much of my time and it isn't my business as usual job, it's something she's passed our way for 'the exposure'. It is taking up so much of my time, I can't do much of my other work and have had annual leave that I booked ages ago and had plans for, which is making it even more intense. I come back to emails from my colleagues with requests from clients that were emailed 3 days previous asking me to 'pick this up'. I tell my manager Im not too pleased with that and it also makes us look bad to the client that they've waited that long for a response and she agrees. Yet the very next day she emails my colleagues and copies me in asking them to do something urgent on Monday, but states as I am on annual leave that they are to forward their low priority work to me to action when I am back. It's like it's a deliberate disregard for what I said the day before.

In addition to this, I have had to leave some of my project work (the project I said I was worried to take on) with another colleague, who said she is More than happy to help while I am off. However I've seen an email today where this colleague has emailed my manager to say she's unsure what she has to do as she's had no information from me. I am puzzled because we had a detailed handover about it. All she needs to do is draft a letter for me and I've emailed her the bulk of what needs to go in it. My department can be extremely bitchy and we've had a couple of people submit grievances because of it. I feel like she has tried to stab me in the back.

I am just so fed up. I work to a ridiculous pace (so do my other 2 colleagues in fairness) but I feel my part time working is just not took into consideration, it is looked at as a hinderance to the team, and that impression I get from my manager more than anyone else. Just lately I never take a proper lunch break, engage in conversation with my colleagues because I am simply too busy, or even look at my phone for 5 mins on lunch etc. I am worrying about work all of the time, checking my emails on days off about 30-40 times a day to see what's coming in, or what I fear I may have messed up on etc due to rushing. I asked to get paid my annual leave because it's so busy but my manager said no, so I had to take it. It's pointless me taking holiday because I don't enjoy it anymore as all I do is think about work. It consumes me. I did tell my manager this and all she said is slow down and take my time. But then emails my colleagues inviting them to email me more work during my time off and she is always on my tail asking for updates, actions on everything.

I can't talk about work without getting quite upset about it. I feel people are now starting to become bitchy towards me for working less etc. I have an appointment at my GP tomorrow and I plan on asking to be signed off but I am nervous and not sure whether to. I've not had a sick day for 3 years and I'd never normally consider being signed off, but I am seriously worried my health is having an an effect on my unborn baby. My house is an absolute mess as I have no desire to clean etc, which for me is quite odd. What should I do?

NinaMarieP Mon 03-Apr-17 22:00:50

If you're signed off you'll be counted as off sick and if your employer considers it pregnancy related they will most likely start your maternity leave as you are 36 weeks.

If you're happy with using up maternity leave with four weeks to go, then do it. You might get lucky and they'll let you be off sick then start you

MaudGonneMad Mon 03-Apr-17 22:01:29

I think being signed off at 36 weeks will trigger your maternity leave.

NinaMarieP Mon 03-Apr-17 22:01:45

... your maternity leave when your baby is born.

Sounds like a pretty tough environment for you at the moment, being off either way might be the best thing for you.

Babyroobs Mon 03-Apr-17 22:03:38

Signed off ? You are 36 weeks pregnant, why on earth don't you just start your maternity leave now? When were you planning on finishing.
I think your employer can make you start maternity leave rather than you go off sick.
I don't understand why so many people put their health at risk by working until they are about to give birth .

Impatientwino Mon 03-Apr-17 22:05:05

The sheer length of your post alone tells me that you are not happy and need to get out of that environment.

Get some rest before baby arrives flowers

TotalPineapple Mon 03-Apr-17 22:07:13

As others have said, sickness at this point will trigger the start of your Mat leave.

If you want to try to avoid that you could go in and see her and say that you feel your pregnancy is affecting your ability to cope with the work load and that you either need to lighten your duties or start your Mat leave now.

From the sounds of it I'd be triggering Mat leave now and planning to never go back.

Justcurious000 Mon 03-Apr-17 22:07:30

I thought maternity was only triggered if the sickness was pregnancy related? I am due to finish at 39 weeks. I didn't anticipate things being so difficult, it wasn't las time around sad

DipsyLaLa22 Mon 03-Apr-17 22:08:58

If you are signed off sick now, your employer can make you start your maternity leave.

A sick note (MED3) is only needed after a week. You need to self-certify for the first 7 days if you are off sick. Many GP's won't do one for the first week.

Justcurious000 Mon 03-Apr-17 22:11:59

I am supposed to give 8 weeks notice to change my maternity leave. They haven't even got my replacement sorted, have done interviews but nothing finalised. I am also expected to train this person when they join. My partner says I shouldn't do going off sick because it will make things awkward and pointed out how will I be able to go back to that once I've been signed off with stress? I wish my gp could write something else on the note, naughty I know but I am worried what work will think as well.

Babyroobs Mon 03-Apr-17 22:15:16

Just ask the Gp to put that the stress is causing risk to your baby and you need to start mat leave early. there's not much they can do then surely ?

Babyroobs Mon 03-Apr-17 22:18:03

I'm not sure how people think they can carry on working in a busy , stressful environment until a week before they are due to give birth !. With my ds2 I was meant to finish work at 34 weeks ( which years ago was the norm). I was in a very stressful , physically hard job. I didn't even make it until then and went into premature labour.

TotalPineapple Mon 03-Apr-17 22:21:00

Are you sure it's not eight weeks notice to change your return date or to move your leave date later?

I was under the impression that you could always move your leave date earlier - what if the baby came early?

To be honest they're idiots if they haven't lined up your replacement - you only have three weeks left anyway.

If you'd rather get the GP to sign you off because it 'looks better' than telling them you're want to start Mat leave now just tell the GP you're really tired and not coping, that your back hurts and that you've got terrible reflux and feel sick all the time (those are just some of the reasons I started my Mat leave a week sooner than planned).

isupposeitsverynice Mon 03-Apr-17 22:22:50

Do you want to go back there after maternity leave anyway? It sounds pretty grim. I'd be tempted to go sick now, triggering maternity leave, and then just look for a different job when it comes to time to go back.

Justcurious000 Mon 03-Apr-17 22:26:24

What would anyone else do now? I'm worried that going off now will leave them in the shit as I have lots of emails already to action and stuff on my maternity handover that I've prepped ready etc, but they don't know where it's saved etc.They'll be one down, I'll look the bad guy etc, but I can't bear the thought of going back in and dealing with the repercussions of my colleague not understanding how to pick up,this project work. I'll get quizzed and questioned by my manager, why didn't you do the letter yourself etc. I'm just so tired of it all.

Justcurious000 Mon 03-Apr-17 22:29:33

I realise by reading my original post that I'm losing the plot slightly with it all.

It states in a letter I had 8 weeks notice is required. They'd say no anyway and say it's too short notice.

Hawkmoth Mon 03-Apr-17 22:30:47

Get signed off and email them where the handover is. Then unplug yourself and take care of your own wellbeing.

Ihatethedailymail1 Mon 03-Apr-17 22:31:15

Just finish now. Do you really need all this hassle? Start your mat leave now and it's your managers job to pick up the slack, not yours. If they haven't got your replacement already they are idiots. Why don't you want to start it now?

TotalPineapple Mon 03-Apr-17 22:34:57

I'd go back one more day, dropping massive hints about how I'm starting to feel really shit all morning, then after (your non-existent) lunch go see the manager and tell her you're feeling awful and you think you should get the handover stuff as done as possible because you're worried you might be preggo-poorly. Then I'd get signed off/call in sick the next day.

Or I'd just call in sick now, depending on how 'fuck 'em' I was feeling.

I had a bloody awful pregnancy and certain elements at work weren't great about it, I had very few fucks left to give by the end.

TestingTestingWonTooFree Mon 03-Apr-17 22:35:06

Start maternity leave now. Get medical advice that you should. Don't worry about the company. They don't sound worried about you.

elodie2000 Mon 03-Apr-17 22:37:05

Are you planning to go back after the baby is born? It sounds awful. How hard would you find it to get a new job later on- when your maternity ends?

brownmouse Mon 03-Apr-17 22:41:30

Totalpineapple is spot on. Go in tomorrow, start preparing the handover. Grab your bump and wince a few times 'when no one is looking.' Say you feel a bit queasy.

Bingo - off you go and CHILL. No one will question it.

Helbelle75 Mon 03-Apr-17 22:42:22

I have stressful job and was planning on working until 37 weeks. At 35, I'd had enough and work was seriously affecting my health. The gp signed me off for a week and I started mat leave at 36 weeks.
Best thing i've done.
Sod work - nothing's more important than you and your baby.

unfortunateevents Mon 03-Apr-17 22:43:03

Forget about emails ready to send, where things are saved etc. You might go into labour tonight and they'd just have to manage! They sound like a shit company to work for so I wouldn't worry about how they will cope. They obviously don't care very much or they would have sorted something before now. I'm not sure if someone already mentioned it but, at 36 weeks pregnant, I'm sure your doctor will easily find a reason other than stress for which you need to be signed off, if that is a concern.

Twopeapods Mon 03-Apr-17 22:43:07

Honestly I think you should just start your Mat Leave. Explain to your GP and then call into your work to say that your doctor thinks it would be in your best interest to stop working now. He may or may not write a letter. Give them the information required then leave them to it. They seem to have pretty unrealistic expectations from someone who works part time and is heavily pregnant. Take the last few weeks to rest and relax.

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