Just that really, I am a full time working mum, I am the main wage earner and DH works part time and mainly does the school runs etc. We're happy with this, it was a joint decision - Dh is a brilliant father, a fantastic partner and we work well together, but I get so utterly fed up of the language it's encased in! It is constantly portrayed as he is doing women's work. His mother constantly jokes about him being honorary mum, this has translated into the school mums at the play ground, if doing the washing or something he will joke that he is being 'washer women' (loads more examples but you get the picture) - all said in good humour but when I correct or challenge people on it I'm accused of being over sensitive (this irritates me even more!), but all of this screams sexist crap to me!
It drives me nuts on two levels (in no particular order btw!); 1) there is an underlying assumption I should be doing this and somehow failing by not. No-one ever calls me 'honorary dad', no one ever masculines my work or role, nope - I get comments such as being called a 'career woman' and not built to be a 'stay at home mum' - it is simply suggested that I am somehow falling short and DH has to step in to make up for my failings - oh and isn't he great to drop himself down to 'women's or mums work'. It is all crap - I was at home for 3 years when children were really small and loved it - I simply do what WE decided was best for our family!
2) I have 2 boys aged 4 and 6 - I don't want them caught up in the patriarchal rubbish - I don't want them having to grow up thinking this is women's work and this is man's. They hear all of this and sometimes even imitate the language. Great they've got a role model who is a fabulous dad and they see their parents work as a partnership but they still are influenced by this gendered rubbish.
Am I over reacting....
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DH is 'honorary mum' who does 'women's work' - absolutely fed up with it - my morning feminist rant!!!
61 replies
smyle · 06/02/2017 08:56
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